411’s Smackdown Report 12.15.2006

Posted by Arnold Furious on 12.15.2006

The end is near…

411's Smackdown Report 12.15.2006

The end is near…

We're in Boston, Massachusetts. Hosts are Michael Cole & JBL.

TONIGHT – Brothers of Destruction v Mr Kennedy/MVP. Also…

PROMO TIME – John Cena. The (other) champ is here! He wonders out loud why he's on Smackdown. He's here for 3 reasons. 1. He lives here. He makes a point of going and giving his Dad some love down in the front row. 2. It's the holiday season. He discusses the WWE's secret santa program. This year he has Michael Cole. He's gotten Cole everything he wants for Christmas. Let's see there's an enormous hard sausage, a picture of David Hasselhoff without his shirt and a giant bag of salty nuts. "Everyone knows Michael Cole loves to eat salty nuts". 3. At Armageddon (not the movie he loves or his favourite Deff Leppard song of all time) but the PPV this Sunday. He has a history making chance of teaming up with the other world champion, The Mighty DAVE~! This brings out KING BOOKER with the Queen. Also FINLAY is out here. Booker says the only history this Sunday will be he and Finlay destroying two world champions in one match. Booker points out he humbled Batista last week. We get footage of that. Booker says they beat him so bad he's not here tonight. He says they don't want Cena to feel left out so they're about to give him the old ‘Batista beatdown' this week. This doesn't go down though because out comes BATISTA. Heavy bandage on the left arm to sell last week but otherwise fine. This brings out TEDDY LONG. He decides to make his own history here tonight by booking Cena in a match with Finlay.

PAUL LONDON/BRIAN KENDRICK/JIMMY WANG YANG w/Ashley Massaro v WILLIAM REGAL/DAVE TAYLOR/GREGORY HELMS

Two feuds get condensed into one match to help build towards the PPV. Helms goes after London to start and tries to school him. London comes back with an armdrag and in comes Kendrick for the double team work. Flying forearm from Kendrick gets 2. Regal & Taylor position the referee and lay in a cheap shot. Regal with the big left hand punch. Taylor comes in and dumps Kendrick on the ropes. Regal in to just grind on Kendrick's face with his knee. Regal throws more knees and tries to remove Kendrick's head but the ropes save him. Ashley & London try to get the support going as Kendrick battles out of a chinlock. So Regal just suplexes out of it. Taylor in and he headbutts the midsection. Kendrick tries for a sunset flip so Taylor punches him in the face. Helms comes in and works a front facelock and takes it down with a twisting takeover. Taylor in but Kendrick dodges in the corner and hits an Enzuigiri. Helms prevents a hot tag but Kendrick suplexes him and brings in Yang. He cleans house and hits a nifty rana on Regal. Spinning heel kick for Helms gets 2. Everyone spills in there with London throwing dropkicks all over the place. Regal and Taylor walk out on the match leaving Helms on his own. Yang hits him with a moonsault press and that's enough for a pin at 5.26.

Winner: Jimmy Wang Yang via pinfall. Served it's purpose of keeping these two feuds fresh in everyone's mind ahead of the PPV. Meanwhile Yang scores a pinfall over Helms that he talk about if he comes up short on Sunday. Meanwhile Regal & Taylor can claim their only aim in the match was to wear down Kendrick, which they did.

PRESS CONFERENCE – Armageddon. Chavo rants at Benoit who retorts saying the only woman who's getting hit is Chavo Guerrero. There's talk of sizzling flesh. Batista tells Finlay & Booker they're getting the "ass whuppin' of a lifetime".

MATT HARDY v JOEY MERCURY

During the entrances they show footage from the December to Dismember match. No tag partners here and no Melina. Matt starts faster and hits a bulldog for 2. Matt goes up possibly for the Yodelling Legdrop but Mercury yanks him off by the leg. Mercury works on a chinlock while JBL suggests that Hardy is the better singles wrestler given his experience in said area. Mercury hits a neckbreaker and goes up for the Yodelling Legdrop, well, fistdrop. That gets 2. Hardy gets up a head of speed and hits a clothesline. Yodelling Elbow drop gets 2. Side Effect followed by the Twist of Fate and that'll do it at 3.59.

Winner: Matt Hardy via pinfall. They sure dumped Joey's push in a hurry. He was made to look effortlessly inferior there.

SHILL – the Inferno match. Cole points out it's been 7 ½ years since the last Inferno match. Here's a history of the previous matches…

1. Taker beat Kane (Unforgiven '98) – Kane's arm on fire.
2. Taker beat Kane (RAW Feb '99) – Kane's leg on fire.
3. Triple H beat Kane (Smackdown Dec '99) – Kane's hand on fire.

Kane doesn't have a great record in these matches, huh?

BACKSTAGE MVP threatens his agent on the phone until Mr Kennedy comes in there. He points out their match is next. They talk about their matches at Armageddon and which one is worse. MVP says tonight they're on the same page only if it's just for tonight. Kennedy agrees.

ELSEWHERE the Brothers of Destruction stare at each other then the camera.

MVP/MR KENNEDY v UNDERTAKER/KANE

There's a hearse in the entranceway, which freaks out the heels. MVP's pyro scares him. Kennedy opens up the hearse to make sure it's really empty this week. JBL sells the Last Ride match claiming his bout with the Undertaker "ruined" his career. He goes as far as to question why Teddy Long remains on as GM after booking all this. This bout ends up being joined in progress thanks to a well placed ad break. Kane is working over Kennedy and he holds him up there with a choke. Kennedy gets a back elbow in and panic tags MVP in. He throws some close quarters knees but Kane sideslams him. Diving clothesline from Kane before he sets MVP up for Taker. The dead man strikes away in the corner and intimidates the referee. Taker decides to grind his arm across MVP's face instead of covering him. He goes to work on the arm and goes for the Old School but Kennedy distracts for long enough for MVP to armdrag him off. Kennedy comes in and wails on Taker beating him down in the corner. Kennedy gives Taker such a kicking he falls outside where MVP takes over bouncing Taker's head off the steps. Kennedy tags out and holds Taker for MVP to kick at him some more. MVP gives him enough time for Taker to turn the tables and beat him down. Old School connects. MVP gets whipped into the BOD corner. Kane comes in blind allowing Kane to run into a big boot. Kennedy runs into one too. Kennedy is left alone and double chokeslammed. He isn't legal though. BOD call to finish and Taker goes for the Tombstone but MVP pulls him out of the ring. Taker bails after him and they brawl into the entranceway. Bell rings at 6.32. Decision? Kennedy DDT's Kane on the floor thus doing his buddy MVP a huge favour.

POST MATCH Kennedy gets in the hearse and threatens to run Kane over but the lights go out as Taker's music starts. When they come back on Taker is in the passenger seat of the hearse. Heh, neat trick. As he and MVP go to run Kane sits up and starts laughing.

Winner: no decision

CHAVO GUERRERO w/Vicky Guerrero v SHOICHI FUNAKI

Chavo gets on the mic to further berate Chris Benoit to hitting a woman. He demands Benoit come down here right now to apologise. This eventually brings out CHRIS BENOIT. He's not dressed to compete. Chavo continues to berate Benoit while hiding behind Vicky. Benoit says he doesn't owe anyone an apology and he won't apologise for what he'll do to Chavo this Sunday. Benoit stays at ringside while Chavo wails on Funaki. Back suplex and Chavo stops off to shout at Benoit. He just stands there shaking his head. Saito suplex and Chavo reminds Benoit that'll happen to him too. Another Saito suplex. Funaki starts getting a few punches in but Chavo soon puts a stop to that. Whirl backbreaker. "That's you Chris". Brainbuster. Funaki is out. Chavo wants to add in "the message", which would be a frogsplash at 1.57.

Winner: Chavo Guerrero via pinfall. It's good they made Chavo look strong by winning so easily.

POST MATCH Benoit jumps in there for a brawl, which he wins with a Sharpshooter in quick order. Chavo is tapping. Vicky comes over and slaps Benoit. Again. How much of this will Benoit take? He just laughs and Vicky screams and crumples.

VITO v SYLVAN GRENIER

"There's the next Mr Cole" – JBL. Apparently Vito was looking for man love off Cole last week. Vito starts a lot quicker than Sylvan. JBL wants to blow up the ring and send both guys to "freak heaven". Vito minces around on the apron, which gets clotheslined off there. Sylvan pins for 2. Vito comes back with a few punches and a backdrop. Running clotheslines score. Crowd looks bored. Vito dances a bit and hits a legdrop for 2. Sylvan dumps him on the buckles and hits a version of the Samoan drop for 2. Vito hits the dress Thesz press. Vito with the roll up at 3.25 and this one is over.

Winner: Vito via pinfall. Bad match. Two bad gimmicks collide. Neither guy is over. No one cares.

PROMO TIME – The Miz w/Krystal. Miz has some covered plates out here. This is the Miz's "face your fears" challenge to prove he can eat disgusting stuff like the Boogeyman. He talks about how he was on Fear Factor. Tonight he's eating his fears. Plate one has pig's tongue. Miz happily chews away on that. It's salty apparently. It's also done. BAM! Plate two has monkey brains. "It smells like puke". He eats the monkey brains and Krystal looks ill. Miz enjoys the monkey brains. Plate three has worms. He can't manage the worms, which prompts JBL to suggest putting worms at the entrance so Miz can't get in the arena anymore. BOOGEYMAN pops his head out through the worm plate and scares off the heels.

FIT FINLAY v JOHN CENA

Booker and Batista are banned from ringside. Finlay has a shillelagh, which is in his corner. Cena overpowers and backs Finlay down. Cena dodges a few attacks and hits a hip toss. Elbow drop gets 2. Finlay tries to beg off but Cena boots him. Finlay gets his boots up in the corner. Short arm clothesline and Finlay ties Cena up in a nervehold. He keeps him in that with elbows. Cena gets out into a belly to belly for 2. Cena with a running splash for 2. Don't see that often. Impartial referee Nick Patrick backs Cena up so Finlay can get a breath in the corner. Finlay promptly takes over drags Cena onto the apron where he bounces his head off the edge of it. Cena with an inside cradle for 2. Crowd rallies behind Cena. He just about gets a drop toehold and tries for the STFU but Finlay gets the ropes. Outside and Finlay rams Cena back first into the apron. LITTLE BASTARD is out here. Finlay throws him at Cena but he's caught and thrown at JBL! He catches the Little Bastard and they have a brawl. Heh. Finlay has to calm his leprechaun down as we go into the ad break. We return with Finlay working a wristlock. Cena battles out so Finlay clotheslines him. Finlay is working the same arm as Batista's injured arm. Cena backdrops out but Finlay drop toeholds into the Fujiwara armbar. Knee into the shoulder joint and Cena gets thrown out of the ring. Finlay smacks Cena's arm off the steps. Back inside Finlay locks up the arm again. Cena powers up looking for the FU but Finlay gets out of it because Cena's arm hurts. He goes for it again but again Finlay gets out. Cena opts for a clothesline instead. Shoulderblock scores. Protobomb. Finlay can't see him. Five Knuckle Shuffle. Cena stops to sell the arm afterwards. Finlay baits him into the corner where Cena charges and injures his arm again. CELTIC CROSS! Cena kicks out at two and a half. Finlay messes with the turnbuckle and Little Bastard throws a chair in behind the ref's back. Cena kicks the chair back in his face and pushes through the pain barrier to deliver the FU at 16.41.

Winner: John Cena via pinfall. I don't see they couldn't have just put Finlay over in an upset. Still the crowd goes home happy and Cena still has a bad arm to add to Batista's bad arm on Sunday.

POST MATCH King Booker runs in for a slugfest. The heels have a two on one. Finlay blasts Cena with the shillelagh but BATISTA is out for the save. He cleans the ring out but Cena is hurt too now.

I'm back with Armageddon. I have your live coverage right here on 411. Join me for that.