The Impact Crater 02.22.07

Posted by Ryan Byers on 02.23.2007

This is truly an historic column, as I give Vince Russo credit for doing at least three things right. Be sure to read it, because this may never happen again.

Welcome, folks, to the Impact Crater. As always, I'm your host Ryan, and here's our look at all things TNA for the week of February 22. This week we've got Bobby Bacala hitting the TNA rings, Kurt Angle going face-to-face with Scott Steiner, and more gimmick matches than you can shake a stick at. Let's see if it produces a quality wrestling show or more of the usual crap.

Quick and Dirty Results

Segment #1: AJ Styles vs. Rhino promo
Segment #2: The Dudley Boys defeated LAX in Country Whipping Match
Segment #3: The Voodoo Kin Mafia and Lance Hoyt defeated James Storm, Bobby Roode, & Eric Young
Segment #4: Scott Steiner vs. Kurt Angle contract signing
Segment #5: Jerry Lynn defeated Austin Aries, Sonjay Dutt, Jay Lethal, & Low Ki in a ladder match for the number one contendership to the X Division Championship

Angle Numero Uno: There Won't Be Any Questions When You Get Steiner-Signed

Of course, TNA continues to revolve around Kurt Angle, this time with his contract signing against Scott Steiner. The idea of Steiner being the money-hungry prima donna and Angle being the upright defender of TNA is a unique way of starting a feud, though it could have been fleshed out a little bit more in the promos between the two men. In fact (and I can't believe that I'm about to say this), what this entire segment needed was more talking and less action. The back and forth between Steiner and Angle was rather good, but then it was abruptly cut off well before it should have been.

And what was it cut off for? A three-on-one beatdown that probably shouldn't have happened. When Angle single-handedly took out Steiner, Tomko, and Christian last week, I mentioned that it was a dumb idea because now there's no reason for fans to buy Angle versus Steiner. TNA could have undone some of that damage here by having Scotty destroy Kurt. That way they're even headed in to the pay per view, and you can pay to see who will win the series of encounters. As it stands now, Angle has already destroyed Steiner once, and Steiner hasn't been able to beat up angle without the help of two other men. So Angle is still clearly the tougher of the two, again leaving no real intrigue as to the outcome of the pay per view match.

I will say, though, that I've been waiting for Scott Steiner to headbutt somebody with that metal headdress ever since he started wearing it. It's about damn time.

Angle Numero Dos: AJ and Rhino Get High

The opening segment between AJ Styles and Rhino was EXACTLY what professional wrestling as a whole and TNA specifically needs more of. It was about five minutes long, established that one wrestler does not like another wrestler, and established that those two wrestlers will fight each other in a match at the next pay per view. That's what professional wrestling is at its very essence. IT'S SIMPLE. You don't need twenty minute long promos to establish these things. You don't need wacky characters. You don't need to be giving away PPV caliber matches on free TV. You just need to create an issue between two guys, create some legitimate question as to who will win, and then let them go. History has proven time and time again that this will make money for your wrestling promotion, and I don't understand why so many people seem to have forgotten it in 2007.

However, you also need to have a good match to blow off that feud, otherwise people eventually lose faith in your company and stop coming back for more. Sadly, I don't think that TNA is in a position to cap off this feud with a good in-ring encounter. No matter how often Mike Tenay calls it "innovative," Elevation X is a glorified scaffold match, and I don't know that there's been a good scaffold match in the history of professional wrestling. It also completely fails to play to AJ's strengths, as he won't be able to do any of his high flying on top of that structure. (And, in the event that he tries, he'll probably just wind up hitting his head on the ceiling.) Plus the stipulation completely telegraphs the winner, as there's no way that the 280 pound Rhino will be the guy taking that massive bump down in to the ring . . . unless they think of a logical way in which to get a bunch of tables set up down there.

So, after botching the beginning of the feud (in that we never actually learned why these guys hate each other or why AJ turned heel), TNA seems to at least be giving it a decent middle. Unfortunately, I don't have much faith in the ending.

Angle Numero Tres: Belting Out the Hits

Before we get in to the storyline advancement, I want to briefly make an observation about the in-ring. What the hell is the deal with the Dudleys stealing everybody else's moves? D-Von busted out the Austin/Thesz Press at the beginning of the match, and then, towards the conclusion, Bubba Ray busted out the Rock Bottom. Sure, Austin and the Rock aren't wrestling these days, but using their signature moves so closely to the height of their popularity makes the Duds look pretty low rent.

I'm still a little bit uncomfortable with the fact that TNA is basically promoting the Dudley Boys versus LAX as a race war, but the "Belting Pot" match accomplished exactly what it needed to accomplish. In order for the feud to continue, the Dudleys needed to show that they could beat LAX. Doing it in this match allowed for the victory to take place without making the heels look too weak, as they can claim that they were prejudiced by the presence of the Italian crew at ringside. Plus Bobby Bacala was worked in to the match without actually getting in the way, so it was certainly one of the less offensive celebrity guest appearances on record. However, I still maintain that if the Dudleys really wanted to strike fear in to the hearts of their opponents, they would've gotten Janice Soprano in their corner.

And the Rest . . .

~ The delivery in Sting's promo on Abyss was solid, but what the hell was he talking about? The two guys are going to have a match in which one of them is strapped to a metallic bed and lifted up to ceiling of the Impact Zone. (Hopefully not getting crushed in between the bed and the Elevation X scaffold in the process.) Somehow, hanging from the ceiling of the building will kill him and force him to choose whether to go to heaven or hell. To quote Steve Austin, "What?"

~ Did we really need a two minute long six man tag to set up ten seconds of Chris Harris chasing James Storm through the crowd? It's these kinds of worthless throwaway segments that TNA needs to get rid of. Do that and you don't NEED a second hour, boys.

~ Ditto for the bit with Abyss roughing up the football player, though I still have to give that segment ***** for Don West asking Abyss "Do you have something that you want to say?" in a tone that indicated he thought he was talking to Lassie.

~ Nice, quick promo from Samoa Joe hyping up his title match with Christian. For the past year or so, Joe has been the most underrated mic worker in pro wrestling. He's not an ultra-charismatic, Rock-like entertainer, but he has a gift for making his words sound like they're being delivered by a legitimate competitor in a legitimate sport. Given that a legitimate sport was PPV's biggest draw in 2006, that's not a bad thing.

~ The second round of Paparazzi Idol fell just as flat as the first one did. Jay Lethal is still doing his Randy Savage schtick, leading to Don West referring to him as "a man who is reluctant to do his impressions." A MAN WHO IS RELUCTANT TO DO HIS IMPRESSIONS. Is this what passes for a gimmick in 2007 in TNA?

~ So Jerry Lynn is the number one contender for the X Title. Great. So the X Division match was the main event of the show. Great. So Bob Backlund, essentially a midcard (if that) comedy character, is the guy that we see going over at the end of our main event. Not so great.

Overall

There was more good stuff than usual on this edition of Impact. As previously noted, the Rhino/AJ Styles promo was great, the mic work in the Angle/Steiner segment was similarly strong, and the outcome in the Belting Pot Match was the best finish that they could have done. On top of that, the in-ring, though brief, was of a higher quality than usual on an Impact broadcast, as LAX and the Dudleys are working well together and the ladder match had a couple of interesting spots. Plus it seemed like there was less of an effort by the company to cram every single wrestler that they have on to the program. Just about everybody was there, but guys like Abyss, Sting, and Joe were all limited to bit parts while Angle, Steiner, and Christian were allowed to take on major roles. It's this sort of "cycling" talent that I've advocated for a while, as TNA needs a system like that in order to keep everybody involved in a feud without overloading the shows.

However, despite the good, there were still some problems with the program. I understand that putting the ladder match in the main event spot was probably an attempt to make the X Division feel important again after it's essentially been trampled under the weight of Vince Russo's idiocy for the last several months. Yet, if the company was going to do this, did they really need to involve Bob Backlund? If they're really serious about rebuilding the X Division, it needs to be divorced completely from this lame schtick, and having Backlund as the focal point of the post-match happenings took away a lot from Jerry Lynn's win and reburied the entirety of the division in one fell swoop.

The other big problem that I have with TNA these days is it seems that every last match must have some sort of gimmick tied to it. Though I previously stated that I liked how the gimmick of the Belting Pot Match played in the LAX versus Dudleys feud, they still shouldn't have done it on the same program as a ladder match. Two gimmick matches in the same one hour show is overkill. Things have been even worse on the last several pay per views, and this one doesn't look like it's going to be any better. We've already got AJ Styles versus Rhino in the Elevation X match and Sting versus Abyss in the Last Rites Match. Plus I'm willing to bet that the company won't let the Dudleys versus LAX and Sabin versus Lynn rematches happen without some sort of stipulation. If you have too many of these big gimmick matches in your promotion, they start to mean less and less. Not only that, but your regular matches also mean less, so it's harder to get the crowd excited for what could otherwise be a great, straight up rasslin' contest in the main event. Unfortunately, this sort of hotshotting is a Russo trademark and has been for quite some time, so I don't see it going anywhere anytime soon.

As a whole, this was one of the better Impacts in a while thanks to the positive aspects of the show mentioned above. However, there are still some lingering problems with the company that will hopefully be dealt with sooner rather than later.

That does it for this week. I'll see you all again on Tuesday with the unfortunately-delayed WSXtra report, and I'll be back in seven for another Crater. Until then, check out my MySpace profile for exclusive blog content, links to my favorite wrestlers' profiles, and bulletins indicating every new column I post on 411.