Your hosts are Michael Cole and John Bradshaw Layfield.
Theodore Long announces a Last Man Standing match between the Undertaker and Batista at Backlash. Fit Finlay and Mr. Kennedy come out for their match, but Mr. Kennedy wants to make nice. Finlay accepts his apology as long as he doesn't touch his Hornswoggle. They're always after me Hornswoggle. Teddy Long comes back out and says, since they're so chummy, they can team up against Batista…and THE UNDAHTAKAH!
In the back, Jillian injures Ashley's leg to keep her out of Timbaland's video.
WWE Tag Titles: Paul London & Brian Kendrick vs. Deuce & Domino (w/Cherry).
JBL calls London & Kendrick one of the greatest tag teams in history, which is kind of odd to hear because they've had one memorable match in the year since they won the title. They need their Midnight Express, their Brainbusters. I don't think Deuce & Domino are it, but we'll see. The champs hit stereo armdrags early, and London dropkicks Deuce off the apron (and nearly catches the referee too). He nearly misses a somersault plancha. I guess that's why they call it high risk. When we come back from a break, the champs are working over Deuce's arm. Kendrick winds up playing face-in-peril for a bit, and the match bogs down. See, that's why D&D aren't primetime yet. London gets the hot tag and cleans house. D&D start to doubleteam and set up for the Flatbush Finisher (or whatever it's called), but the ref disqualifies them for excessive doubleteaming at 13:00. I'm guessing this leads to a "we're not satisfied with that" match at Backlash with a "No DQ" stip. **
In the back, Teddy makes plans with Kristal to go to Milan…ITALY! Deuce & Domino interrupt to complain, and Teddy tells them to obey the rules. You know, like the one about interoffice dating.
"The Condemned" trailer. I swear to you that the smarmy villain's quote about watching violence actually comes directly from Vince McMahon. Some peanut-brained actor says, "It's amazing that it's taken this long for a movie to challenge reality television." Yeah, like "The Running Man" or "EdTV" or "The Truman Show" or "Series 7: The Contenders" or "My Little Eye" or…well, I've made my point. No need to pile on.
Non-Title: Chris Benoit vs. MVP.
JBL busts out the "he smells like smoke because he's been through fire" line for MVP. Okay, that one's becoming clichéd and needs to be retired. Don't start relying on stock quotes now, JBL. MVP tries the same defensive strategy he tried at WrestleMania, but Benoit fires away with chops. Benoit charges into a boot but reverses a suplex to one of his own. MVP makes it to the ropes to avoid a Crossface and locks in a neckvise. Benoit powers up and reverses to a German Suplex. MVP retreats to the apron where Benoit tries to German Suplex him to the floor! Benoit has to settle for yanking him off the apron instead, and he pays for it by getting sent into the post. We come back from a break to Benoit in the neckvise again. Benoit elbows out of it but runs right into a belly-to-belly. MVP goes after the shoulder again, refocusing on his defensive strategy. See, this match has the time to establish a depth that the WrestleMania match was missing. Benoit hits a Northern Lights and knees his way out of a suplex. MVP makes the ropes to break a Crossface but winds up in ROLLING GERMANS! MVP cuts off the diving headbutt but gets chopped back down to the mat. DIVING HEADBUTT…misses! One match builds to the next! I love it! MVP hits a Yakuza Kick in the corner, but it only gets two despite him making the "touchdown" gesture. MVP blocks more Rolling Germans and tries to German Suplex Benoit OVER the top rope. Benoit counters to a rollup, but MVP blocks and grabs a handful of ropes for the win at 20:01. As impressive as the match at WrestleMania was, this is the match that one should have been. MVP continues to impress, and Benoit looks intent on bringing him along. ***1/2
Kristal interviews MVP on his win. The gist: I told you so.
Recap of Raw.
Kane vs. Daivari.
Kane is still pissed about losing to Khali. Doesn't he ever get over anything? "Wah! X-Pac stole my girlfriend!" "Wah! I got set on fire!" Pull yourself up by your bootstraps. Kane methodically destroys Daivari for poops and giggles. JBL starts pushing for a "Mercy Rule" in the WWE. The chokeslam finishes at 2:37. William Regal and Dave Taylor attack in retaliation for last week. Kane makes his own save. 1/2*
Mark Henry is apparently on his way back. I look for him to be re-injured by Summerslam. Michael Cole uses a tortured segue to a promo for "The Condemned."
The Undertaker & Batista vs. Mr. Kennedy & Fit Finlay.
Finlay makes Kennedy start with the Undertaker. Taker holds his own until the numbers overwhelm him. Kennedy chokes Taker with the tag rope as Finlay distracts the ref. Batista is kind of "ho-hum" about the whole thing. Taker gets sick of that and tees off on both of his opponents. Batista blind tags himself in as Kennedy cuts off the big boot. Batista cleans house on both Finlay and Kennedy. Batista stops to do the Ultimate Warrior pose, allowing Taker to tag himself back in. We come back from commercial to Taker and Batista arguing over who should be in. Taker goes Old School, but Finlay cuts him off. Things start to get boring as it's just a pissing contest between Taker and Batista while Finlay and Kennedy are only around to play punching bags. Taker goes for Old School again, but Batista tags himself in. He stops to smirk at Taker and gets blindsided. Kennedy clips Batista's knee for two, allowing the heels to get some offense in. Finlay nails Batista with the shillelagh, so Taker tosses in the ringsteps. That's what you call "escalation." Ha ha! Escalation…stairs. Taker's tantrum doesn't help much as Kennedy continues to work Batista's leg. Finlay grabs a half-crab. Batista powers to the ropes, but Finlay dropkicks his knee. Finally, Batista hits Finlay with a spinebuster and tags out. Taker cleans house, and Batista tags himself in again. Finlay sends Taker to the floor for a brawl while Batista finishes Kennedy with the Demonbomb at 20:53. What's with Mr. Money in the Bank…Bank taking the fall? Anyway, this was boring while the faces were posturing and slightly better when the heels took over. All their leg work never really went anywhere, though, and it was just to kill time. The point was to further the Taker/Batista match, though, and it certainly did that. Batista earned back a little of that 2005 edge that made him so popular in the first place. **1/2
The 411: Pretty good wrestling show this week, outside of Kane/Daivari. I know I'm one of the few who wasn't that impressed with Batista vs. Taker, but I think their match at Backlash will far surpass Mania, and people will see what they're capable of. Meanwhile, MVP looks like he may wind up fulfilling his potential sooner rather than later. Hopefully, they keep up the little heel rivalry they had between Kennedy and him over the winter, because these are the next two stars of Smackdown (assuming they don't dump the brand split altogether).
