411’s TNA Impact Report 5.03.07
Posted by Larry Csonka on 05.03.2007
Abyss is apparently dead, but Chris Harris has been healed! Oh yeah, and they set the main event for Sacrifice.
Remember to send your thoughts on the show for the 3R's!
TNA Impact Begins…NOW!
-We get a video recap of last week's show.
-Tenay and West welcome us to the show.
-Sting makes his way to the ring. Angle attacks with a chair, Sting blocks with the bat and they brawl. Security is out to stop that.
-JB is with Cage. He calls them pathetic, and agrees that they have a gripe. He'll go and sort it out.
-Back in the ring Sting and Angle argue over the title shot. Angle says he has a problem with Sting, and Sting says he attacked him because Angle cost him the title.
-Christian Cage makes his way out to the ring. "Can't we all just get along?" He says JJ handed Sting a title shot, and that means he didn't earn it. He also agrees that Angle is an asshole, but he also has a point. But also Angle did cost Sting his chance at the title. Since Cage is a humanitarian, he'll solve the problem. Sting and Angle team to face AJ and himself. Whoever gets the pin or submission (Angle or Sting) they get the title shot at Sacrifice. If they lose, neither get the shot. Sting says he already has a title shot, and then Angle asks if he is an ICON or a pussy? Sting accepts.
-Leticia is with Team 3D. Their legacy has been achieved, they are the NWA Tag Champions, and hold the most important titles of all time. They will be fighting champions. At Sacrifice they will face Steiner and Tomko and LAX, but tonight it is Joe and Rhino. They have fought with Rhino and against him, and he is a bad mother. Joe, they've heard about him and look forward to seeing how great he is. TESTIFY~!
Rhino and Devon to begin. Shoulder block by Rhino, and then one by Devon. Ray in, they take Rhino down and Ray wants Joe. That's a mistake. Joe in and they lock up, headlock by Joe. Off the ropes and a snap mare, chops and kicks. Misses the knee drop, SICK GERMAN by Ray! T BONE by Joe in return! Ray trips him, misses an elbow drop and they stand off. Lock up, to the corner and Joe fights them off, Devon stuns him and Ray gets a back suplex for 2 as Rhino makes the save. All 4 in, Uranage by Ray on Joe. GORE by Rhino! Christopher Daniels runs in with the bat and attacks Rhino.
Winner: No Contest @ 2:35
-Joe gets the clutch and tosses him in the ring. Slam by Ray. Rhino and ray hold Daniels, head butt by Devon. They all slap each other and do the get the tables deal. Devon and Rhino toss in a table, Enziguri by Joe. GORE through the table by Rhino. 3D, Rhino and Joe celebrate.
-JB is with Cage and AJ. AJ says he always goes to Cage first. AJ doesn't like being volunteered for these matches. Cage says when they beat Sting and Angle, and they will, they will pick the bones and then, there will be no contenders. That leaves a "phenomenal" opportunity. AJ says he stole his hood and now he wants to steal his title shot. Cage says that makes them a team, like their chest hair. He says AJ will be that contender. AJ hugs him and says he is sorry.
-Back from commercial with highlights of the Roode/Young drama.
-Roode and Brooks are in the ring, and he isn't happy. He hates Young and he will fire him tonight. Traci is sporting a neck brace, nice. He demands Young come to the ring. Cornette is out and says to back up and listen. Cornette told JJ to stay home tonight, because he won't have men beat up women, no matter how deserved. He also says the only people that should be fired are he and his floatation floozie. He stayed out of this, but it has to come to an end. Well, he signed Young when he already had a TNA contract, and breeched it. HE could fire Young, but since he signed the contract with you, that means Roode tampered with TNA contracts. Cornette could take him to court or fire HIM. What he suggests is that Roode needs to drop it and then it is all over. Roode doesn't like that idea and says Cornette should leave. Roode says if he could have done something he already would have, and he will fire Young anyway. Cornette calls him a punk and Roode tosses him down and tells him not to touch him. Young makes his way out to the ring and he and Roode brawl. Young fires up and Young gets a guitar! Roode stops him and DDT's him. Brooks has handcuffs again and they cuff him in the corner. Brooks slaps him repeatedly, and Roode has the guitar. Crowd chants "WE WANT JARRETT" as Roode kills him with the guitar. Security and refs finally come to the ring. Cornette is back in the ring and says if Roode thinks he is a bad man, well he will make his life worse. At Sacrifice Roode will face JJ at Sacrifice. Eric Young on a pole match?
-Back from commercial and they discuss Abyss. We see the beat down that happened. During it, Mitchell says Abyss is finished and has been replaced. Ricky Banderas from WSX?
STREET FIGHT: Jackie vs. Gail Kim
Jackie has a bull rope with her. Kim has a cookie sheet and a bag of toys. Sex toys? Kim attacks first with the sheet and to the floor, slam by Kim. Kim slammed to the railing, they go up the ramp and rights by Jackie. Cover for 2. Back ringside and into the ring they go. Kim finds a trashcan of fun and tosses toys in. Con on Jackie, she gets a stick and beats the can and covers for 2. Jackie NAILS her with the cane and then chokes her out with it. To the corner, head butts by Jackie. She grabs the cane and POWDER by Kim! She gets a bra and chokes out Jackie. Jackie stops that, and gets a chair. Dropkick into the chair by Kim and that's all. I think that is where she supposedly lost teeth.
Winner: Gail Kim @ 3:00 via pin
-Storm is out and Jackie beats down Kim. DDT and she holds up Kim, Storm has the beer bottle and Harris is out to make the save. He takes off the eye patch and he's HEALED~! THE POWER OF CHRIST COMPELLS HIM~! He clears the ring.
-Hemme is backstage and VKM w/Hoyt is here. She has a surprise for Sacrifice. That's all.
-Back from commercial with the continuation of the Paparazzi stuff from last week. Sabin and Backlund brawl and Backlund owns him. Shelley scores points and they them jump him. They steal his book. THUGZ~!
NO DQ MATCH: Sting & Kurt Angle vs. AJ Styles & Christian Cage
Whoever gets the pin or submission (Angle or Sting) they get the title shot at Sacrifice. If they lose, neither get the shot.
Cage and Angle to begin, off the ropes and a shoulder block by Angle. Uppercuts to Cage, but he fights back with chops. Elbow to Angle and off the 2nd rope, caught and a toss by Angle. He covers for 2. Tag to Sting, rights to Cage. Off the ropes and a boot by Cage, but he eats a dropkick from Sting. He tosses AJ, press slam on Cage and drops him. Vader like splash gets 2. Cage battles back, knee by AJ and he trips Sting. They crotch him on the post. Elbows by AJ and we head to the commercial @ 2:15.
Back from commercial @ 5:40 with Sting taking the beat down. He fires back against Cage, but is dropped with an elbow. AJ in and covers for 2. Rights by AJ, Sting battles back again and AJ trips him up, and Sting tosses him via his legs. Tag to Angle and he cleans house. Clotheslines, GERMAN on Cage. AJ counters and then eats a SICK release German for 2. Cage pulls Angle to the floor and they brawl. Back in and attacks Sting. He and AJ talk, Cage misses Sting and he lays them both out. DOUBLE Stinger splash! Death drop on Cage gets 2 as Angle stops it! AJ in, double Uranage on him! Sting says if you want it, take it. Cage breaks it up with a chair. AJ gets a chair as Cage works over Sting. AJ in, conchairto try on Angle…he ducks and they miss! Belly to belly on Cage and he goes all the way to the floor. They get a double ankle lock on AJ and he taps.
Winners: Angle and Sting @ 9:30 via double submission over booking
-Cornette on the mic and he asks who AJ tapped to? He doesn't know, so the title match will be a 3-way at Sacrifice.
-We get the closing wrap up video do hickey.
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