411’s WWE Heat Report 09.09.07
Posted by Scott Slimmer on 09.09.2007
We’ve got angry rednecks on Heat. And I’m not talking about everybody that paid to see Delta Farce…
Hey guys and gals, I'm Scott, and this is 411's WWE Heat Report.
You're probably aware that unlike Raw and Smackdown!, Heat is now available exclusively on WWE.com. You may also be aware that Heat is now only available as full-length episodes instead of individual segments. This change in presentation means that the previous Preview / Review format of the Heat Report is now somewhat obsolete. So from now on I'm going to be using a more traditional recapping style that will be most similar to the Review section of previous Heat Reports. Be sure to email me and let me know what you think of the new format. I want this Report to be as useful as possible, so I'm always open to suggestions. Okay, enough with the boring stuff. Let's get to the wrestling.
Match 1: Super Crazy vs. Shawn Spears
We start off with the new WWE: The Power is Back video followed by the Heat opening video. Todd Grisham, alongside Jonathan Coachman, welcomes us to Heat. "I am super! I am crazy! I am Super Crazy!" Super Crazy's music hits, and the last Mexicool standing makes his way down the ramp. Crazy slides into the ring where Shawn Spears is already waiting for him, hits his spectacular head-stand forward flip kip-up, and then heads to the corner to get some lovin' from the crowd. Dude, Spears is totally the new poster boy for the WWE Wellness Program. He stands about 6'4" or 6'5" but looks like he barely weighs two bills. Wellness, baby! Anyway, both men seem ready for action, so the referee signals for the bell, and this match is officially underway.
Crazy and Spears circle each other to start before locking each other up in a collar-and-elbow tie-up. Crazy switches to a standing rear hammer lock, breaks the hold, and gets a single leg takedown. Crazy locks in a sweet rolling leg lock, but Spears makes it to the ropes to break the hold. Both men get back to their feet and circle each other for a second time. Spears connects with a kick to the gut and a punch to the face. Spears traps Crazy in the corner and gives him a series of shoulder blocks to the gut. Spears whips Crazy to the opposite corner and charges after him, but Crazy floats over and gets the Sunset Flip for a two count. Spears comes back with a Side Russian Leg Sweep, but that only gets a two count.
Crazy fights back with a kick to the chest, but Spears retaliates with a clothesline and three fist drops. Spears covers Crazy but only gets a two count before Crazy kicks out. Crazy connects with a back kick to the jaw, but Spears hits a standing suplex. Spears covers Crazy but again only gets a two count before Crazy kicks out. Spears locks in a modified rear chin lock, but Crazy fights back to his feet and breaks the hold with a series of punches to the face. Spears goes for a sunset flip, but Crazy rolls through and lands a basement drop kick to the face. Crazy slams Spears and connects with a springboard moonsault for the three count. Super Crazy's music hits as the referee raises his hand in victory. Crazy rolls out of the ring and heads back up the ramp as Spears ponders a career in accounting.
Match Result: Super Crazy defeats Shawn Spears with a springboard moonsault. Match Length: 4:19 Best Spot: Super Crazy's springboard moonsault
We move on to a commercial for The Highlanders vs. Lance Cade & Trevor Murdoch later on Heat.
Next up is the new WWE: DO NOT Try This At Home video, now featuring footage of the Shawn Michaels casket bump from Royal Rumble 1998. Sweet!
Match 2: "Hacksaw" Jim Duggan vs. Some Dude
"HOOOOOOOO!" "Hacksaw" Jim Duggan's music hits, and the Tomorrowland Transit Authority to Ric Flair's Space Mountain makes his way down the ramp. Duggan climbs into the ring where Chad Collier is already waiting for him. Duggan parades around the ring and seriously considers beating Collier with the 2 X 4 before the match even begins. Dude must be traveling with Sandman these days. Anyway, both men seem ready for action, so the referee signals for the bell, and this match is officially underway.
Duggan starts by dancing like Tatanka. I shit you not. This man gets more and more senile every week. Anyway, Duggan hits a back drop followed by a hip toss and a delayed scoop slam. "U.S.A.! U.S.A.! U.S.A.!" Collier connects with a knee shot to the gut, but Duggan levels him with a clothesline. And another clothesline. And a third clothesline. Collier gets back to his feet on the ring apron and drops Duggan's neck onto the top rope. Collier is in charge and levels Duggan with a head butt. Collier covers Duggan but only gets a two count before Duggan kicks out.
Collier locks in a rear chin lock, but Duggan fights back to his feet and breaks the hold with a series of haymakers. Collier fights back and locks in another rear chin lock, but Duggan once again fights back to his feet and breaks the hold with a couple of elbow shots to the gut. Collier goes to the top rope but misses a diving head butt. Duggan connects with the Three Point Stance Clothesline and gets the three count. Duggan's music hits as the referee raises his hand in victory. Duggan is insanely over with this crowd.
Match Result: "Hacksaw" Jim Duggan defeats Some Dude with the Three Point Stance Clothesline. Match Length: 3:42 Best Spot: Duggan's Three Point Stance Clothesline
We move on to a commercial for the WWE Magazine Divas Special, available on newsstands everywhere.
Match 3: The Highlanders vs. Lance Cade & Trevor Murdoch
We're back on Heat, and it's time for our MAIN EVENT! Lance Cade & Trevor Murdoch's music hits, and the World Tag Team Champions (at least in the Northern Hemisphere) make their way down the ramp. Dude, Lance Cade got his hair cut. Now he kinda looks like a guy that used to team with Mark Jindrak. What the hell was that dude's name? Garrison something or other… Anyway, the Highlanders' music hits, and Mosh & Thrasher version 2.0 make their way down the ramp and climb into the ring. All four men seem ready for action, so the referee signals for the bell, and this match is officially underway.
Looks like it's going to be Murdoch and Rory to start the match. Murdoch and Rory lock each other up in a collar-and-elbow tie-up, but Rory switches to a standing side head lock. Rory hits the ropes and levels Murdoch with a shoulder block, but Murdoch fights back with a knee shot to the gut. Murdoch traps Rory in the corner, but Rory retaliates by slamming Murdoch's head into the top turnbuckle. Rory follows up with a head butt but only gets a two count. Robbie tags into the match and hits the ropes, but Murdoch catches him with a back elbow shot. Cade tags into the match and slams Robbie's head into the top turnbuckle. Robbie whips Cade to the opposite corner and hits a monkey flip. Rory tags into the match and the Highlanders clean house as we head to a commercial.
We move on to a commercial for The Condemned, available September 13th wherever DVDs are sold.
We're return to the match to find that Cade & Murdoch have taken control. Cade and Robbie are the legal men, but Robbie is precariously close to getting counted out of the match. Oh shit. Isn't this how Cryme Tyme got the ax? Get back in the ring, mother fucker! Get back in the ring! Robbie makes it back at nine and Cade gets a two count. Murdoch tags into the match, and Cade assists him with an elevated leg drop. Murdoch traps Robbie in the corner and hits him with the chops. Cade tags into the match and lands a chop of his own. Cade traps Robbie between the ropes and connects with a series of cross faces. Murdoch tags into the match and levels Robbie with an elbow shot to the head. Murdoch locks in a rear chin lock, but Robbie breaks the hold with a jaw breaker. Murdoch does an awesome inverted Flair Flop but eventually manages to tag Cade into the match. Cade hits a Side Russian Leg Sweet and tags Murdoch back into the match. Murdoch heads to the top rope and flies off, but Robbie gets his legs up. Murdoch catches Robbie's legs but misses an elbow drop. Rory tags into the match and cleans house. Robbie comes in to help, but Cade sends him over the top rope. Cade distracts Rory, and Cade kills him with a top rope flying bulldog. Cade & Murdoch's music hits as the referee raises their hands in victory.
Match Result: Trevor Murdoch defeats Rory with a top rope flying bulldog. Match Length: 7:36 Best Spot: Murdoch's tope rope flying bulldog
Okay kids, that's it for this edition of Heat. Hope you had fun. Feel free to email me with any comments or suggestions. I'll see you back here next weekend.
