411’s WWE Heat Report 11.18.07
Posted by Scott Slimmer on 11.18.2007
Tag team wrestling is alive and well on Heat. Carlito’s career, on the other hand…
Hey guys and gals, I'm Scott, and this is 411's WWE Heat Report.
You're probably aware that unlike Raw and Smackdown!, Heat is now available exclusively on WWE.com. You may also be aware that Heat is now only available as full-length episodes instead of individual segments. This change in presentation means that the previous Preview / Review format of the Heat Report is now somewhat obsolete. So from now on I'm going to be using a more traditional recapping style that will be most similar to the Review section of previous Heat Reports. Be sure to email me and let me know what you think of the new format. I want this Report to be as useful as possible, so I'm always open to suggestions. Okay, enough with the boring stuff. Let's get to the wrestling.
Match 1: Snitsky vs. Carlito
We start off with the new WWE: The Power is Back video followed by the Heat opening video. Todd Grisham, alongside Jonathan, welcomes us to Heat. Carlito's music hits, and WWE's new Dead Man Walking makes his way down the ramp. Seriously, even Carlito seems to be resigned to the fact that his days in WWE are numbered. And that number is probably low enough that even Eugene could count that high. He gets jobbed out… TWICE!... in Puerto Rico, his WWEShop.com merchandise goes on clearance, and now he's curtain jerkin' Heat. Anyway, Carlito climbs into the ring and waits for doom to arrive. And no, I don't mean Butch Reed. Snitsky's music hits, and WWE's own Morning After Pill makes his way down the ramp. Snitsky climbs into the ring and heads right for Carlito. This is gonna get ugly. Both men (well, at least Snitsky…) seem ready for action, so the referee signals for the bell, and this match is officially underway.
Carlito takes several large bites out of his apple and heads right for Snitsky, but Snitsky grabs him by the throat and tosses him into the corner. Snitsky charges after Carlito, connects with a running back elbow shot in the corner, and causes Carlito to shoot his wad high into the air. And yes, I do mean the apple, you sick freaks. Snitsky drags Carlito back to the middle of the ring, gives him a scoop slam, hits the ropes, and connects with an elbow drop to Carlito's chest. Snitsky drags Carlito back to his feet, locks in a double underhook, and shakes the shit outta the poor schmuck. Carlito refuses to submit, so Snitsky breaks the hold, drives Carlito down to the mat with a clubbing forearm shot to the back, drags him back to his feet, lifts him up onto his shoulder, heads for the corner, and goes for snake eyes, but Carlito floats over lands on his feet behind Snitsky, and shoves him to the corner. Snitsky slams shoulder-first into the top turnbuckle, connects with two punches to Snitsky's injured shoulder, and tries to whip Snitsky to the opposite corner, but Snitsky puts on the brakes and instead whips Carlito to the corner. Snitsky charges after Carlito, but Carlito gests both feet up and plants them firmly in Snitsky's shoulder. Carlito leaps out onto the top turnbuckle but then comes back in with a springboard drop kick to Snitsky's shoulder. Carlito covers Snitsky but only gets a one count before Snitsky kicks out.
Both men get back to their feet and Carlito connects with a punch to Snitsky's face before trying to whip Snitsky to the ropes, but Snitsky puts on the brakes and instead whips Carlito to the ropes. Snitsky waits for Carlito to rebound and ducks his head to telegraph the back body drop, so Carlito pulls up short and kicks Snitsky right in the chest. Carlito hits the ropes and charges at Snitsky, but Snitsky damn near decapitates him with a Big Boot. Snitsky drags Carlito back to his feet, hits the Pump-Handle Slam, and gets the three count. Snitsky's music hits as the referee raises his hand in victory. Snitsky climbs out of the ring and heads back up the ramp as Carlito wonders where it all went wrong. So horribly, horribly wrong…
Match Result: Snitsky defeats Carlito with the Pump-Handle Slam Match Length: 1:44 Best Spot: Carlito's springboard drop kick
We move on to a commercial for Paul London & Brian Kendrick vs. The Highlanders vs. Cody Rhodes & Hardcore Holly in a Triple Threat Tag Team Match to become the Number One Contenders for the World Tag Team Championships, still to come on Heat.
We move on to a commercial for Randy Orton vs. Shawn Michaels for the WWE Championship at Survivor Series, live on Sunday, November 18 at 8e/5p, only on pay-per-view. Wait, so Michaels can't use Sweet Chin Music? Dude, he's fucked, right? I mean, that's his finishing move, right? I mean, it's not like he can win a match, much less a championship, with any other move, right? I mean, there's no way that Michaels could ever win the WWE Championship… at Survivor Series… with a move other than Sweet Chin Music. I mean, he'd have to use something completely different… maybe some sort of submission… maybe something like the Sha… Oh, I get it now…
Match 2: The World's Greatest Tag Team vs. Steve Fender & Dinn-T Moore
The World's Greatest Theme Music hits, and two guys who clearly shop at the same ring gear store as AJ Styles makes their way down the ramp. Benjamin and Haas climb into the ring where Steve Fender and Dinn-T Moore are already waiting for them and hit the corners to rile up the crowd. Benjamin and Haas remove their warm-ups and lay out their game plan. All four men seem ready for action, so the referee signals for the bell, and this match is officially underway.
Haas and Fender head to their respective corners and climb out onto the ring apron, so it looks like it's going to be Benjamin and Moore to start the match. Benjamin and Moore circle each other to start before locking each other up in a collar-and-elbow tie-up, but Benjamin quickly transitions to a standing side head lock on Moore. Moore tries to counter into a standing rear waist lock on Benjamin, but Benjamin counters into an arm wringer on Moore instead. Benjamin leverages Moore down to the mat and transitions to an arm bar, but Moore fights back to his feet and breaks the hold with two forearm shots to Benjamin's face. Moore tries to whip Benjamin to the ropes, but Benjamin reverses and instead whips Moore to the ropes. Benjamin waits for Moore to rebound, charges towards him, and absolutely levels him with a running back elbow shot to the face. Benjamin drags Moore back to his feet, applies a standing front face lock, drags him over to the corner, and allows Haas to tag himself into the match. Benjamin holds Moore as Haas climbs into the ring and kicks Moore right in the gut.
Benjamin climbs out onto the ring apron as Haas connects with a clubbing forearm shot to Moore's back. Haas whips Moore to the ropes, waits for him to rebound, and ducks his head to telegraph the back body drop, so Moore pulls up short and kicks Haas right in the chest. Moore staggers over to his corner, tags Fender into the match, and climbs out onto the ring apron. Fender climbs into the ring and charges at Haas, but Haas catches him with a front kick to the gut. Haas whips Fender to the corner, and Fender slams shoulder-first into the top turnbuckle. Fender staggers back to the middle of the ring, so Haas puts him in a standing hammer lock, guides him over to the corner, and again slams him shoulder-first into the top turnbuckle. Fender again staggers back to the middle of the ring, so Haas hits him with an arm breaker followed by a standing arm bar. Haas drags Fender all the way down, pins his arm on the mat, and connects with three knee shots and a kick to Fender's injured shoulder. Haas drags Fender back to his feet, applies an arm wringer, guides him over to the corner, and tags Benjamin back into the match. Haas holds Fender as Benjamin climbs up to the top turnbuckle and connects with a flying knee drop to Fender's shoulder.
Haas climbs out onto the ring apron as Benjamin gives Fender a shoulder breaker in the middle of the ring. Benjamin drags Fender back to his feet and Fender tries to create some distance with three punches to Benjamin's gut, but Benjamin immediately levels Fender with a single kick to the head. Benjamin drags Fender back up to his knees and hits him with three cross-face shots followed by a clubbing forearm shot to the back. Benjamin drags Fender back to his feet and hits him with a punch to the face, but Fender falls towards his corner and manages to tag Moore back into the match. Fender rolls out onto the ring apron as Moore climbs into the ring. Moore charges at Benjamin, blocks a punch, and connects with three punches to the face of his own. Moore tries to whip Benjamin to the ropes, but Benjamin reverses and instead whips Moore to the ropes. Benjamin waits for Moore to rebound and ducks his head to telegraph the back body drop, so Moore pulls up short and hits Benjamin with a clubbing forearm shot to the back. Moore goes for a suplex, but Benjamin floats over into a neck breaker on Moore. Benjamin gets back to his feet, heads over to the corner, and tags Haas back into the match. Benjamin drags Moore back to his feet as Haas climbs into the ring. Benjamin and Haas hit The World's Greatest Stun Gun on Moore before Benjamin climbs out onto the ring apron.
Haas gives Moore a belly-to-back suplex and covers him but only gets a two count. Haas breaks the pin himself and gets back to his feet to deal with Fender, who seems to be a bit late with his interference. Anyway, Fender eventually does hit his cue and takes a swing at Haas, but Haas ducks the punch and turns fender inside-out with a SWANK German suplex. Fender lands on his face, rolls out onto the ring apron, and continues rolling all the way down to the arena floor. Yeah, I'm guessing that's the last we'll be see of young Mr. Fender this evening. Anyway, back in the ring, Moore climbs back to his feet, but Haas kicks him in the gut, guides him over to the corner, and tags Benjamin back into the match. Benjamin climbs into the ring and guides Moore to the middle of the ring as Haas positions himself in the corner. Benjamin whips Moore to the corner where Haas gets both knees up and drills them into Moore's back. That was basically a reverse two-man Elijah Express. Moore stumbles back to the middle of the ring where Benjamin hits the T-Bone Suplex and gets the three count. The World's Greatest Theme Music hits as Charlie Haas climbs back into the ring and the referee raises their hands in victory. Benjamin and Haas hit the corner to celebrate their victory, and I'm pretty sure Fender literally fell off the face of the earth.
Match Result: Shelton Benjamin defeats Dinn-T Moore with the T-Bone Suplex. Match Length: 3:39 Best Spot: Haas' SWANK German suplex.
We move on to a commercial for Batista vs. The Undertaker in a Hell in a Cell Match for the World Heavyweight Champion ship at Survivor Series, live on Sunday, November 18 at 8e/5p, only on pay-per-view. Um, am I the only one who finds it really amusing that that both the opening and closing shots of that commercial are actually of a normal cage instead of a Hell in a Cell? WWE's production work is usually second to none, but that's just plain sloppy right there.
Match 3: Paul London & Brian Kendrick vs. The Highlanders vs. Cody Rhodes & Hardcore Holly in a Triple Threat Tag Team Match to become the Number One Contenders for the World Tag Team Championships
We're back on Heat, and it's time for our MAIN EVENT! Paul London and Brian Kendrick's music hits, and my boys run their crazy little asses down the ramp. London and Kendrick slide into the ring, hit the corner, and flip back to the mat. Is it crazy that I really hope these guys win even though I've already read the spoilers and know how that match ends? Anyway, The Highlanders' music hits, and William Wallace's evil cousins make their way down the ramp. I'm guessing these guys are kinda like the Coy and Vance of the Wallace clan. The Highlanders climb into the ring and stare down London and Kendrick, but we still have one more team yet to join the fray. Hardcore Holly's music hits, and WWE's newest master and apprentice make their way down the ramp. The crowd pops like crazy for these guys, and I'd be interested to know which one of them the crowd is actually popping for. I'm guessing Cody, but there's always the chance that the crowd really just wants to see somebody damn near disemboweled in the ring again. Anyway, Rhodes and Holly climb into the ring, and Holly hits the corner to pose for the crowd. All six men seem ready for action, so the referee signals for the bell, and this match is officially underway.
Kendrick, Rory, Rhodes, and Holly all head to their respective corners and climb out onto the ring apron, so it looks like it's going to be London and Rory to start the match. London and Robbie circle each other to start before locking each other up in a collar-and-elbow tie-up. London goes for a single-leg takedown, but Robbie counters and shoves him to the corner. Rory tags into the match, but London fights back with a drop kick and an atom drop. Rory tags Rhodes into the match, and Rhodes takes control with a standing side head lock. Rhodes takes London over and London goes for the head scissor, so Rhodes kicks out. London whips Rhodes to the ropes, but Rhodes catches him with a flying cross body. London tags Kendrick into the match and they hit Rhodes with a double Japanese arm drag. Rhodes catches Kendrick with a body slam and then levels him with a shoulder block. Kendrick goes for a drop kick, but Rhodes swats him away to avoid contact. Rhodes goes for an arm bar into a standing side head lock and then tags Hardcore into the match. Hardcore is HUGE compared to Kendrick. And I think Grisham just referred to Hardcore as the WWE Champion. Good to see that you're still allowed to smoke weed while doing play-by-play.
Hardcore goes to work with the chops, and he's KILLING Kendrick. Kendrick goes up to the second rope and connects with a cross body, but Hardcore fights back with a power slam. Kendrick goes for a roll-up and a crucifix pin, but Hardcore kicks out both times. Kendrick hits a sloppy hurricanrana and drops Hardcore right on his head. London tags into the match, and London and Kendrick give Hardcore a double clothesline out of the ring. London goes for the plancha, but Hardcore chops him in the chest as he falls from the sky. Both men get back in the ring, but Rory gets the blind tag on Holly to get back into the match.
Rory drags London to the corner and tags Robbie into the match. Robbie scores a head butt but only gets a two count before London kicks out. Robbie chokes London against the bottom rope, and Rory hits him with a cheap kick to the head form the ring apron. Robbie locks in a chin lock, but London fights back to his feet. Robbie regains control with a clothesline and tags Rory back into the match. Looks like London is going to be our token face-in-peril for the match. Rory applies a surfboard, but London fights out and gets a near fall from a sunset flip. Rory tags Robbie back into the match, and Robbie connects with another head butt. Robbie hits a clubbing forearm shot to the back, but London fights back with punches to the face and chops to the chest. Robbie drags London down to the mat and gets another chin lock, but London fights out with a series of knee shots to Robbie's head. Robbie manages to tag Rory back into the match, and Rory goes to work with the mounted punches. Roby applies another surfboard to London, but London again fights back to his feet and muscles Rory to the corner to break the hold. Rory misses an elbow drop and tags Robbie back into the match, but London creates some distance and tags Rhodes into the match.
Rhodes charges into the ring and goes to work on Robbie. Rhodes his a back body drop and then slams Robbie's head into the top turnbuckle. Rhodes his a running bulldog, but Rory charges the ring to make the save. Kendrick rushes the ring and hits the Cactus clothesline to send them both out of the ring. Rhodes head to the corner and sets up for a flying cross body or maybe a missile drop kick, but Hardcore blind tags himself into the match. Hardcore hits Robbie with the Alabama Slam and gets the three count. Hardcore Holly's music hits as the referee raises his hand in victory, but Rhodes seems to be less than pleased about the blind tag. Do we have dissention in the ranks? Because Cade & Murdoch WILL take advantage of any weakness in a team. Rhodes climbs out of the ring and calls for Hardcore to join him, and there is definitely some bad blood there.
Match Result: Hardcore Holly defeats Robbie McAllister with the Alabama Slam Match Length: 11:48 Best Spot: Hardcore's chop counter to London's plancha
Okay kids, that's it for this edition of Heat. Hope you had fun. Feel free to email me with any comments or suggestions. I'll see you back here next weekend.
