The Lockdown 2008 Breakdown

Posted by J.D. Dunn on 05.07.2008

Joe finally reaches the top of the mountain.

Lockdown 2008
by J.D. Dunn

April 13, 2008

Live from Lowell, Mass.

Your hosts are Mike Tenay and Don West.

Opening Match, X-Division Xscape: Jay Lethal vs. Curry Man vs. Johnny Devine vs. Consequences Creed vs. Sonjay Dutt vs. Shark Boy.
It's elimination until we get to the last two guys; then, it becomes escape rules. Devine and Sonjay start. Sonjay hits a sloppy rana, but then he and Lethal team up against everyone else. SoCal Val approves. Shark Boy and Curry Man team up for a Pyramid of Doom spot, but Devine blocks. Creed hiptosses Devine to the mat while Lethal and Sonjay continue to doubleteam. Shark Boy hits Lethal with the Stunner, allowing Devine to schoolboy Sonjay for the first elimination at 2:47. Sonjay gets mounted punches on Devine. Curry Man avoids a Creed avalanche and hits the flying hipblock. Creed blocks the Stunner and hits a CreeDDT (hammerlock DDT) to eliminate Shark Boy at 4:30. The fans don't care for that. Curry Man goes to the top, but Johnny Devine crotches him. Lethal recovers and makes the save. Devine misses a Shooting Star Press and gets in a fist fight with Creed and Lethal. Curry Man hits a front flip block on all three guys and finishes Creed with the Spice Rack at 7:13. Curry Man and Lethal team up for a Hart Attack on Devine. Curry Man turns on Lethal with the Spice Rack, but Devine boots him in the head and eliminates Curry Man with Devine Intervention (the Jaydriller) at 8:33. Devine tries to go out while they're pulling Curry Man out, but Lethal grabs him. Devine ties Lethal in the ropes so he can't move, but Sonjay keeps the door locked. Devine goes over the top as Sonjay hands Lethal a knife. Lethal is able to cut himself free and dive through the door to retain his title. (10:26) Like a lot of X-Division matches, this packed a lot of spots into a small amount of time. It could have used a longer escape portion. **1/2

Jeremy Borash asks resident expert Frank Trigg what's going through the two main eventers' minds. Trigg says Joe is probably more nervous because he hasn't been able to make it over the top.

Queen of the Cage: Roxxi Laveaux vs. Rhaka Khan vs. Angelina Love vs. Velvet Sky vs. Traci Brooks vs. Jacqueline vs. Salinas vs. Christy Hemme.
It's one of those reverse battle royals where you have to fight to get in the ring, and the two who get in have a match. Angelina Love quickly makes it up and into the ring as everyone else brawls on the floor. Roxxi squirms free from Velvet Sky and makes it in. Well, that was worthwhile. It took all of 90 seconds for them to get in the ring. If you're going to book a match like this, the point is to have the heel crawl up and get in quickly while the babyface has to fight and claw and scratch on the outside and race to the top against one of the other heels so that she has nothing left when she gets back in. Instead, they just scurried up and started the singles match. Love hits her version of the Flatliner for two. She rolls Roxxi up for two, but Roxxi's kickout sends her into the cage. Roxxi hits the Voodoo Drop for the win at 5:27. Brisk. The right person went over the right other person, though. *

New interview mannequin Lauren asks Samoa Joe what he's going to do if he loses. Joe says he hasn't thought of it. He gives a good intense promo on Angle. If you close your eyes, he sounds just like a pissed off Rock.

Cage Match: BG James vs. Kip James.
Kip blindsides BG and pummels him. Kip hits an early Ace Crusher. BG doesn't get in a move as Kip keeps on top of him. Kip hits the Fameasser but takes his time in covering, so BG is able to kick out. BG goes low and hits the kneedrop. Kip tunes up the band but misses the Stinger Splash. That allows BG to end with a schoolboy rollup at 6:46. Laaaaaaaaame. Kip offers to raise BG's hand, fooling only Tenay and West. Sure enough, he suckers him into a clothesline. 1/2*

Kurt Angle says Samoa Joe has taken him to the limit every time they've wrestled.

Cuffed-in-the-Cage Match: The Rock 'n' Rave Infection vs. Eric Young & Kaz vs. Black Reign & RelliK vs. The Motor City Machine Guns vs. LAX vs. Scott Steiner & Petey Williams.
The monsters attack and lay out Eric Young before the match. Everyone teams up on Scott Steiner and cuffs him to the cage, thus negating his presence. EY makes his way down to ringside, but the cage is locked. The monsters make faces at him until EY turns tail and heads to the back. Sabin and Shelley get cuffed. Too many bodies in there to focus on any one thing. Rave saves Hoyt from taking the Border Toss into the cage but gets Crackerjacked. Kaz hits the Flux Capacitor off the top of the cage, but he tries on Hoyt and gets chokeslammed. Super Eric storms down and hits a crossbody onto the pile. The monsters try to cuff him to the cage, but he turns it around and cuffs RelliK (which is "killer" spelled backwards). Eric cuffs Black Reign for the win at 10:43. TNA always seems to fall victim to trying to get EVERYONE on the roster onto the PPV, even if they don't need to be. This is one of those cases. Outside of Hoyt, no one else really offered anything interesting. **1/4

Awesome Kong & Raisha Saed vs. Gail Kim & ODB.
Saed is wearing a burqa to protect her identity, which is not a bad idea because Cheerleader Melissa has been making appearances as herself on Impact. She gets the best of both worlds. Chills it out, takes it slow, then she rocks out the show. I also like that she wore turquoise bottoms. Nice touch. Saed outwrestles Gail and targets her wrist. Kong occasionally provides a clubbering move from the outside. Saed stomps a mudhole in Gail's face. OUCH! Kong tags in and squashed Gail with an avalanche. She tags in Saed, though, and Gail is able to come back with a spear. HOT TAG TO ODB! ODB takes on both Kong and Saed. Fallaway Slam to Saed, and ODB kips up. Kim goes up, but Saed catches her and goes for a superbomb off the top. Kim reverses to a huracanrana in mid-air, though! Awesome. Gail stops to celebrate and gets steamrolled by Kong. Saed grabs ODB and holds her for the spinning backfist from Kong, but ODB ducks out of the way, and Kong nails Saed. Kim missile dropkicks Kong out of the way, and ODB finishes Saed with a bodysplash at 8:27. **3/4

In the back, Karen Angle returns and says she's concerned about the toll this match is taking on Kurt.

Booker T & Sharmell vs. Robert Roode & Payton Banks.
Sharmell actually distracts Booker early, trying to get in. He puts her out, but that gives Roode the opening to attack from behind. Booker chops his way back and hits a back kick. Roode ducks a swing and hits a dropkick. Sharmell's contributions pretty much amount to "Jack him up, baby! Don't hurt that face, baby!" Roode hits a spinebuster and rips at Booker's nose. Booker comes back with his own spinebuster. SPINAROONIE! Roode avoids the Axe Kick and tosses Booker into the cage. Sharmell tags herself in and slaps the hell out of Roode. Roode grabs her, though, and holds her for Banks. Banks stops to talk trash to Booker. Probably something along the lines of "I'm going to turn and slap whoever is immediately behind me without looking, and I'm going to naturally assume it's your wife." In fact, that's just what she does, but Sharmell has slipped away from Roode and he takes the slap instead. Banks is so shocked that Sharmell is able to roll her up for the win at 7:37. After the match, Roode berates Payton for her stupidity (well, it *was* pretty stupid). She begs for forgiveness, but he leaves her in the ring. Not a whole lot of tagging going on. It was basically Roode vs. Booker with a Sharmell vs. Payton coda. **

Lethal Lockdown: Christian, Sting, Kevin Nash, Matt Morgan & Rhino vs. Tomko, AJ Styles, James Storm & Team 3D (w/Jacqueline).
They tease Christian vs. Tomko early, but Tomko is just distracting him while AJ goes up behind Christian and nails him with a flying elbow. AJ hits the over-and-under dropkick, but Christian chops his way back. AJ hits the Quebrada DDT. AJ goes for a rana, but Christian counters to a powerbomb. AJ blocks the Unprettier and hits the Pélé (OH, IT JUST COMES OUT OF NOWHERE!). Brother Ray is the second guy out for Team Tomko. He wears a Derek Jeter jersey, which works okay at getting a "Yankees suck" chant, but if he wanted REAL heel heat, he should have worn a Giants jersey. The Yankees have been the Red Sox' bitches for nearly half a decade. Ray slams the cage door into Christians head, and he and AJ work him over until Rhino evens things up. Rhino sets up for the gore on Ray, but AJ cuts him off with a dropkick. James Storm comes in and immediately hits Cage with the Eye of the Storm. AJ and Christian fight to the top of the cage and duke it out. AJ wins, and Ray runs into the cage, knocking Christian to the floor. Kevin Nash comes in and delivers the Snake Eyes to AJ. Christian climbs up to the top of the cage and delivers a GORGEOUS crossbody onto Bubba and Storm. Great visual there. Brother D-Von is next. Thing start to bog down a bit as the heels focus on Nash's knees. Matt Morgan comes in to destroy people. AJ backflips out of a chokeslam but runs into a sideslam. Tomko is the last of the heels, and they meander around the ring for a while. D-Von is busted open. The addition of Sting completes our motley crew, and the ceiling lowers with a bunch of weapons on it. Storm goes up to the top of the cage, but Christian chases him up. Storm's leg breaks through the top of the cage, and he gets trapped, allowing Cage to smash him in the head with a chair. Morgan and Nash hit double chokeslams, and Sting locks in the Scorpion Deathlock. AJ nails him in the head with a Kendo stick and spies Christian setting up a table on the top of the cage. AJ scales the cage and nails Christian with a trash can lid. He puts Christian on the table and sets up a ladder on the top of the cage. Storm holds the ladder, but they take so long that Christian is able to recover and climb up the ladder. AJ and Christian brawl on the top of the ladder, so Storm just tips over the ladder and sends them both through the table! Storm slinks back down into the cage and grabs a beer from Jackie. Morgan starts to stir, so Storm smashes the bottle over his head. He's all cocky for a moment, but he turns around right into the GORE at 26:30. Excellent finish, even though I don't care for Rhino getting the win when there were bigger names in the match that had issues with one another. Great, fun match, though. It would have helped had they not done the useless tag team handcuff match that also had a bunch of people doing aimless brawling and spots. ***3/4

TNA World Heavyweight Title: Kurt Angle vs. Samoa Joe.
So, after all the hype, it comes down to this. Frank Trigg provides commentary. Angle has boxing trunks on in lieu of his usual singlet. Good choice too, because the singlet makes him look positively scrawny these days. Angle has Karen ejected before the match. Also a good choice. MMA-feeling-out process to start. Angle dominates that, although there isn't much of a narrative to it. Sometimes he tries strikes, sometimes he goes after the arm, sometimes he goes after the leg. That's fine if you're really doing MMA because you're really trying to win. This is pro-wrestling, though, and your primary goal is to tell a compelling story. Finally, they do settle into Angle working the leg and applying the figure-four leglock. Joe turns it over, but Angle makes the ropes. Joe LEVELS Angle with a lariat, but Angle slips out of the Muscle Buster and grabs the Anklelock. Joe makes the ropes and hits an STO for two. A powerbomb gets two, and Joe segues to the Stronghold and then into a Crossface. Angle grabs Joe's ankle and turns it into the Anklelock. Joe reverses to the Crossface again, but Angle is in the ropes. Joe rides Angle down into the Crossface again, but Angle powers up into the Angleslam. He locks in the Anklelock, Joe shoves him away and turns it into the Coquina Clutch. Angle makes the ropes, though. Joe shoots him into the cage, hits a thrust kick, and finishes Angle off with the Muscle Buster at 17:35. I like that they were trying to integrate more MMA, but MMA is just another tool that should work in service to telling a story. That didn't really happen here. For an example of where that *did* happen, check out Angle's match with the Undertaker from No Way Out. After that opening sequence the match was almost completely made up of finisher reversals. There's a HUGE middle part in there that could have made this an all-time classic. As it is, it's just a good match that will be remembered as the match where Joe finally won the big one (about a year-and-a-half late). Given the stipulations, though, that was a foregone conclusion. ***1/2

The 411: Everything that was supposed to be good was, and everything else was about what you'd expect from the TNA undercard. While I liked the build for the main event over the previous few weeks, the match didn't live up to the epic feel they had created, and that's something TNA has to learn to do as well as the WWE does. The first half of the show is nothing to write home about, but the final two matches earn this a recommendation.

Thumbs up.