The ECW Palace Perspective: 7.22.08

Posted by Daniel Wilcox on 07.23.2008

Can John Morrison recover from Black Sunday and go on to Summerslam? Perhaps not, but it's a fantastic main event nonetheless.

Disturbance at the Palace!: This past Sunday at The Great American Bash, The Miz and John Morrison lost their WWE Tag Team Champion, thanks to The Miz's incompetence. For the record, Miz doesn't make mistakes, he makes Miztakes.

Reason Why John Morrison is Better Than You of the Week: Despite the tragic events of Sunday, Morrison will bounce back and be better than ever.

From Philly, The Tazz and Mike Adamle welcome us to the show.

Teddy Long is out with a brand new ECW Championship belt, which gets boos. In honor of Mark Henry's first title defence, he wll present the title to Mizark. Mark Henry comes out with Tony Atlas. T'Lo congratulates Henry, who holds the title above his head to show off to the disapproving Philly crowd. Atlas says they are happy to receive the title in the home where ECW began. Tonight, it begins again. This is the new ECW. Really, I can't tell the difference. This title has prestige and credibility and no history of drug-smoking champion. And for those trying to hold on to yesteryear, you are going to get squashed. Insider terms~! Atlas introduce Colin Delaney, complete with new music. Colin shakes the hand of Atlas and Dreamer. He says everyone has been asking him why he did what he did at The Bash. He says he got nothing out of his friendship with Dreamer, and became a laughing stock. He was sick of it. He got with the program. Delaney says if Henry needs his bags carrying, car washed, dick sucked, he's your man. T'Lo says Dreamer is not the past, he is the future, because Delaney has a match with the Dream Machine, right now! Atlas says Colin is on his own and he leaves with Henry.

Match 1: Tommy "Dream Machine" Dreamer vs. Colin "Dream Crusher" Delaney

Colin tries to leave the ring but Dreamer grabs him, tosses him down, drives him into the corner and slaps the piss out of him. Big beale by Dreamer now, shoots him off, but Colin grabs the ropes and ducks out to the floor. Dreamer won't allow that though, and tosses Colin back in. Colin catches him with a low dropkick and then goes on the assault with a variety of kicks and punches and a leg drop for 1. Dreamer comes back with a right to the gut, and a knock down and a big clothesline. Tree of woe as big Dreamer chants go up. HESITATION DROPKICK, with not much hesitation. Compare that to the hang time Chris Sabin gets on that move, and it's laughable. Massive pumphandle throw now by Dreamer, and Colin begs off. Tommy says fuck that, and drops him with a DDT for the win.

Winner: Tommy Dreamer

Match Thoughts: Logically, this feud is now over. They've had their one-on-one match, Dreamer gets his revenged and that's that. What they should have done is have Colin win by interference, leading to an Extreme Rules match in a few weeks where Teddy Long ensures no interference. Instead we got this, and the feud will probably continue anyway. The match was pretty good as Colin sold his ass off and Dreamer had a little bit of fire. The hot crowd helped as they really wanted Tommy to kick ass here and he did just that. **

John Morrison says this past Sunday will forever be known as Black Sunday. Miz says they weren't even pinned, and Morrison correctly points out that that is because no one can beat them, because they are the greatness (also correct). Iz says they have a fatal four way tonight with the winner going on to face Mark Henry for the ECW Championship at Summerslam. Morrison thinks Miz will defy the odds and win the match (although I'm sure that's mind games by Morrison. Damn, he is just so smart). Morrison says Miz is a chick magnet, Michael the Miz. "Look at that hat!" Look at that hat, indeed. Miz got it from a playmate, dude. Miz says Morrison should not sell himself short, he is a former ECW Champion. Morrison points out he beat CM Punk last year at Summerslam. Miz praises Morrison's coat. Morrison says it's farm-raised jackel, because he cares about the environment. Miz wishes Morrison luck, and Morrison hopes the Buddha of luck sits in Miz's corner too. Miz thanks Morrison, but Morrison's all like "thank you." Possibly the greatest segment ever? I think so.

Jenny McCarthy is hot.

Chavo Guerrero and World's Worst Bodyguard Bam Neely join the commentary team.

Match 2: Evan Bourne vs. James Curtis

Curtis is going for the gay-Chris Jericho look tonight. Wait, isn't the Chris Jericho look gay by default? I don't know, ask the sparkly waistcoat. We get replays of Chavo losing to Evan From Heaven (Adamle-ism there) last week, which Chavo blames on the wedding drama. They lock up and Curtis grabs a waistlock so Evan has to block a German attempt, and counters into an arm drag and works the arm, rolling through into an arm bar. Curtis takes over and pounds on Evan in the corner, but Evan comes out with a kick and lands on his feet from a snapmare attempt. Dropkick by Bourne, followed up with a rana for 2. Evan avoids a charge in the corner and hits some high kicks and forearms, but Curtis blocks a monkey flip and Bourne lands on his head. Curtis takes over again with right hands and kicks and hits a back suplex for 2. Bourne fights out of a neck vice and lands on his feet off of another back suplex attempt, then follows up with a series of round kicks for 2. Another rana by Bourne, then a dropkick to the face sets up the BOURNE ULTIMATUM for 3!

Winner: Evan Bourne

Chavo and Neely hit the ring and fall all over themselves trying to get their hands on Bourne, but he's quicker than a hiccup, you see, so they can't get him.

Match Thoughts: Another decent little match for Evan Bourne and an impressive win. Curtis didn't get too much offense, which was important to make Evan look strong. Evan's offense is very crisp and precise, and is the sole reason he is getting as over as he is with the crowd. I liked them going with a Chavo/Evan feud because Chavo is a great guy to put people over and have good matches with. **1/4

Finlay says you don't need luck when you have a shillelagh, but John Morrison would point out that you don't need a shillelagh when you have abs with which you can't grate cheese.

Ricky Ortiz does that man thing where they pretend to listen to a hot chick in the hope of having sex with them. Tiffany has a degree in marketing. Which qualifies her for Teddy Long's assistant, how? Teddy says he had hair like Ricky's back in 76… on his balls. The way Tiffany is laughing makes me think she's known Teddy since '76, but then again, she only looks about 21, which causes me some confusion and concern. Ortiz has been working on some T-shirt ideas, catchphrases and nicknames. Great, just the ring work to go! He calls himself the Latin Assassin, complete with LAX hand gesture. Teddy slows him down. He's only been here three weeks and has had one match, and it sucked. Teddy didn't say the last bit, but it's implied. Ricky points out that he's undefeated. Teddy says Ortiz will be in action next week. Tiffany asks if Teddy really had hair like that and T'Lo responds with "NO BITCH, I WAS JUST FOOLIN' AROUND!" He gives her a backhand and storms off.

We get a Mike Knox video package that actually makes him look impressive.

Matt Hardy says tonight he has a huge opportunity. A huge opportunity. Ashley's dropped her prices?

Match 3: John Morrison vs. The Miz vs. Matt Hardy vs. Finlay w/ Hornswoggle
Winner to meet Mark Henry at Summerslam for the ECW Championship

Miz foolishly tries to quickly roll up Morrison, and gets booted by both Hardy and Finlay. Finlay hits Miz with a head butt as Hardy controls Morrison in the corner. Hardy scoop slams Morrison and then tosses The Miz to the floor, while Finlay clotheslines Morrison over the top. Hardy and Finlay lock up and go to the corner and break, and Hardy talks trash and shoves Finlay. Mistake, as Finlay clotheslines Matt. Matt catches Finlay with a vicious right from the apron, but Morrison yanks him off from the floor. Miz and Morrison beat the hell out of Finlay and Hardy respectively with a variety of elbows, neck vices, forearms and kicks. Hardy comes back on Morrison with a clothesline and Finlay does the same to Miz. Morrison regains control over Hardy as Miz takes an uppercut. Stereo scoop slams by Hardy and Finlay, and Matt comes off of the second rope with an elbow to the back of Morrison's head for 2. Morrison and Hardy slug it out while Finlay gets 2 off of a roll up. Hardy backslides Morrison for 2, and they all stand off as we go to a commercial. We come back to Miz and Morrison in control. Miz gets a 2 count on Hardy off a back elbow. Morrison hits Finlay with a neckbreaker, but they roll through covers getting 2 count after 2 count. Head butt by Finlay, then he turns his attention to Miz, probably because he couldn't handle the sheer awesomeness of John Morrison. Atomic drop to Miz by Finlay, then Morrison takes Finlay out of the equation. Hardy nails Morrison with a big clothesline but Miz breaks that up, until Finlay rolls him up for 2. Miz and Morrison break up a small package from Hardy to Finlay. "Morrison" and "small package" in the same sentence is a rarity my friends, or so I've heard. Miz has to break up a pin attempt by Morrison. Finlay busts out a Fujiwara arm bar as Hardy side suplexes Miz. Finlay tosses Morrison shoulder-first into the ring post, and I think I heard the ring post cry out in pain. Miz and Hardy cancel each other out with clotheslines. Finlay tries to steal a cover on both, the cheap Irish bastard. Morrison's radiant glow cause Finlay to fall to the floor. Morrison goes for a dive but sees Finlay grab the ring skirt and stops himself. Fucking genius! Morrison hits a dropkick through the ropes to take Finlay out. Finlay stops Morrison going after Hornswoggle and whips him into the barricade. A fan pats Morrison on the back, and will likely never wash his hand again. Finlay clotheslines Morrison over into the front row and follows, but Morrison throws an undisclosed beverage into his face. Miz hip tosses Finlay back over the rail and drives him back into the rail. They hit their catapult-into-forearm-followed-by-elbow drop combo with Morrison hitting the elbow off of the barricade. Nice. Matt Hardy fights off both Miz and Morrison for a while. Why must evil Tazz make "house of fire" comments whenever he's around a Hardy? The power of the numbers game catches up to Hardy and the former tag champs hit hm with a double gutbuster. Miz shows Morrison how to hit a snap suplex. Morrison applauds and goes for one of his own, but first sends Miz to go watch Finlay, which allows Morrison to try a quick inside cradle on Hardy, but it only gets 2. Genius I tell ya, genius! Miz is upset and jaw-jacks with Morrison, so Hardy shoves one into the other and rolls Morrison up for 2, but Miz beheads Hardy with a clothesline. Miz and Morrison team up again but Hardy catches Morrison with a reverse elbow and then avoids Miz's running clothesline. Morrison blocks the Twist of Fate and attempts the springboard kick, but Miz gets in the way and pays for it. SIDE EFFECT! That gets 2. Finlay back in and hits Hardy with the Finlay Roll, which Morrison then breaks up the subsequent pin attempt for. Finlay cleans house on Miz and Morrison with clotheslines and other such manoeuvres, and even hits a second rope missile dropkick on Morrison for 2. Hardy then takes out both former tag champs with the running bulldog/clothesline combo, but Finlay sits on Hardy's face for 2. Not as pretty as Beth sitting on Kelly's face on Raw. Miz slips out of the Celtic Cross and hangs Finlay up on the top rope, but may have made the Miztake of landing awkwardly on his knee. Morrison catches Finlay with a running knee to the face but gets tossed, allowing Hardy to cover for 2. Miz breaks it up, but soon falls victim to the shillelagh. Damn Finlay, it sure was lucky Horny had the referee distracted. Morrison catches Finlay with a enzuigiri from the apron but then springboards into a kick to the gut and a TWIST OF FATE for the 3 count!

Winner: Matt Hardy

Match Thoughts:This was another tremendous main event on ECW, featuring four very hard workers who delivered the goods once again. It started off at a relaxed pace but I liked that all four guys were in the action at the same time and then after the break, the pace picked up and it was just balls to the wall action. They worked in some great spots, sweet moves and counters and such and the finish was very, very hot. While I would have gone for Finlay/Henry at Summerslam, I think Hardy can have a decent match with the champ. Major thumbs up for this match. ***3/4

Mark Henry comes out to stare at Matt Hardy. Take a picture, Mark, it'll last longer. In fact, thre are tons of pics on wwe.com!

Show Thoughts: Another very good show. The main event was fantastic and it was supported by two other solid matches. There was good development in the Evan Bourne angle with Chavo and we crowned a new number one contender for Summerslam. There were no bad matches, and no Mike Knox, so big thumbs up for this show.

That does it for another edition of the Palace Perspective, brought to you from the Palace of Wisdom, which is sadly no longer adorned with tag team titles.

Be sure to look out for my Thoughts From The Top Rope later today, and I'll be back with more views from the Palace next week.