411's ECW on Sci-Fi Report 10.28.08

Posted by Michael Bauer on 10.28.2008

Imitation is the greatest form of flattery. Too bad for The Miz and Morrison, they didn't do a good job of either one of them in The Dirt Sheet.

Welcome to the ECW on Sci-Fi! As always, I am Michael Bauer, your 411 ECW Re-capper.

In Memory of Special Delivery Jones.

We open with Teddy Long wearing a stupid wig and thinking he is Ron Burgundy. He hypes up The Dirt Sheet for tonight and a six man tag as Mark Henry teams with Chavo and Bam Neely vs. Evan Bourne, Finlay, and Matt Hardy. He ends by saying he is a moron. Teddy wonders who messed with the teleprompter… Hornswoggle appears laughing. HA!

Opening video brings us to Todd Grisham and Matt Striker.

Evan Bourne, Matt Hardy, and Finlay (with Hornswoggle) vs. Chavo Guerrero, Bam Neely, and Mark Henry (with Tony Atlas)

We get pictures of Evan Bourne's chance against Matt Hardy from Sunday. Matt and Evan shake hands again immediately. Bourne deserves it as he has been amazing lately. Chavo and Bam has had problems lately and then even exchange words at ringside as Mark Henry comes out quickly. The bell rings as Bourne and Chavo start. Lockup goes to Chavo with a single leg takedown. Chavo goes to the headlock, but Bourne is up. Chavo off the ropes, Bourne gets monkey flipped but lands on his feet, and Bourne gets a headscissors for two. Finlay tagged in and he has a headlock. Chavo whips him off the ropes, but gets taken down with a shoulder block. Finlay grounds Chavo with a headlock, but he gets backed into the wrong corner and Bam Neely tagged in. Bam and Chavo exchange words and Finlay gets an elbow to the nose. Bourne tagged in and whipped off the ropes. Bam throws him up, but Bourne hurricaranas him to the outside. Bourne flips over to the outside and hits Bam, but lands on his ankle wrong. He rolls back in, where Finlay and Hardy are to make sue he doesn't get jumped. We head to a commercial at 3:04.

We return at 7:17 as Mark Henry gets tagged in and splashes the leg of Bourne. Henry throws Bourne into the corner and tags in Bam. Bam just stomps the leg and locks Bourne's leg in some ankle lock. Chavo tagged in and he sledge's the leg. Chavo punches him, but Bourne gets a quick kick to the head. Chavo stops the tag and brings in Henry. Mark drops elbows on the leg again and wrenches at the knee. Chavo tagged back in and Bourne tries kicking with his good leg to get away and brings in the champ. Matt Hardy with a clothesline in the corner, followed with a bulldog on Chavo for a two count. Hardy to the second rope and he hits and elbow. Bam gets taken down and Chavo turns into a side effect. Hardy gets the cover, but Bam tries to break it and hits Chavo instead. Chavo gets dumped to the outside, as does Bam. Henry walks in and nails Hardy with the World's Strongest Slam. Hornswoggle runs in and bites the leg of Henry. Finlay gets the shillelagh and nails Henry. Tony Atlas drags out Finlay, but Hornswoggle hits the Low-Pe on Tony Atlas! Chavo runs around and see Hardy down. Chavo heads up top, Hardy is up, but Chavo shoves him back down and hits a quick Frog Splash! Chavo gets the cover and the pinfall on the ECW Champion at 12:20!

Winners: Chavo, Bam, and Mark Henry

Match Rating: *** This was a great six man tag. Bourne looked to really hurt his leg, but if he didn't, he made us all believe it nicely. Chavo now gets set as a new contender for Matt Hardy, which is needed, since Henry really looks to deal with Bourne and get the kid over. Overall, the match was fun and really didn't make anyone look bad.

We get a John Cena video package to hype up his return at Survivor Series. Very well done, showing his history before he got to the WWE. It was a little bit long, but I think it did Cena justice.

We go to a clip of Jack Swagger totally no selling Tommy Dreamer with his cheesy smile.

Tommy Dreamer is with Lena, who has his 19th Anniversary tonight. Dreamer says he still loves performing despite every injury he has had. Dreamer's legacy is about the fight, not wins or losses. Tommy asks Jack what happens if Tommy was to beat the All-American American.

Tommy Dreamer vs. Jack Swagger

Jack Swagger finally gets something of a real opponent. The bell rings and they lockup, but Swagger takes him down and gets a reverses headlock. Swagger kicks at Tommy while he is down, but missed an elbow. Dreamer with an arm wrench and then he catches Swagger with an arm breaker. Dreamer ducks a clothesline and punches away at Swagger. Swagger bails to the floor and Dreamer hits a baseball slide. Dreamer rolls Swagger into the ring, but walks into a knee to the head as he comes in. Both men try to shake off the early part of the match as we head to a commercial at around 2:00.

We are back at 5:28 as Swagger has Dreamer in a headlock and hits a belly to belly suplex as Dreamer tries to escape. Dreamer kicks out at two as Swagger's smile is gone. Dreamer in the corner and Swagger locks in a Dragon Sleeper. Dreamer escapes with knee strikes and Swagger just punches away. Dreamer gets dropped with a huge powerslam. Dreamer avoids an attack from Swagger and punches away. Swagger kicks out after a swinging neckbreaker. Swagger gets drilled by Dreamer's knee. Dreamer can't lift up Swagger, but Swagger walks into a boot. Dreamer hits a second rope clothesline. Dreamer goes up top, but Swagger catches him. Dreamer drops Swagger on the rope and he catches his hand. Dreamer tries a DDT, but Swagger reverses into a Northern Lights Suplex for two. Swagger tries the gutwrench powerbomb, but Dreamer rolls through with a bridge for what should have been three. Swagger somehow rolls through the kickout and gets Dreamer up for the gutwrench powerbomb. Swagger makes the cover and gets the pinfall at 9:32.

Winner: Jack Swagger

Match Rating: **1/2 Finally, Swagger gives us a match which makes us care about him. Swagger elevated his game and finally did something more than just toss guys around. Dreamer did a hell of a job in this match also as it was possibly his best match in quite a while.


The Dirt Sheet with John Morrison and The Miz

This should be something. Morrison opens his shirt and ladies scream. He has diamonds on his chest, enough to deport every illegal alien in San Diego. The Miz introduces himself with too many names. They then start going over their match with Degeneration X, promising to give a fair look at them. They were formed in 1997 and both of these guys were in high school. They hype themselves up as the greatest team of all time. Shawn and Triple H have a ton of title reigns, have families, but what do we know about them? In the spirit of the political times, they have a video package to compare Morrison and Shawn Michaels. It then compares Triple H and The Miz. For Shawn, it's about his dancing in manly chaps. For Triple H, it's about using a big sledgehammer to compensate for something and how The Miz has more game than The Game. They say they are feeling the McPain. Now they bring out "Degeneration X" to The Dirt Sheet. Oh boy, here we go again. But it's funny, since they invented this shit. Miz comments on Shawn's high pants and asks them if the have any funny jokes to start with. The fake Triple H asks if they are ready. Morrison says they don't do bad humor and call themselves A-Listers. The Miz says that if you don't get their humor, too bad. Miz says they have done more than DX's 11 years in one year and they will prove it on the 800th episode. Shawn stops and says he has two words for them. Miz has five and pie faces Shawn. They take down both fakes with neckbreakers. Morrison says there are winners and losers and they have two words for them: Be Jealous!

Segment Rating: *** I admit, this was funny in a small way. But remember, Triple H invented this stuff, so it was a decent shot at flattery.