The Dope on Smackdown 11.07.08

Posted by Michael O on 11.08.2008

Miz & Morrison beating Hardy & Hunter? Undertaker losing to Kozlov? Man, everything really HAS changed...






We were LIVE from Orlando, FLA with J.R. & Tazz.

The V.I.P. Lounge:

MVP is all up in here and he's mo better than you and he's ballin' and he's a playa and everything else. Montel halts the boasting to talk trash about Hurricane Helms, who coincidentally pops up to mouth along. MVP goes on to talk about how much money he makes and how great he is and how nothing is going to stop him until the The Great Khali comes out for the Punjabi interruption. Much to the displeasure of MVP, Ranjin highjacks the segment and it's time for the Kiss Cam! Montel leaves and Ranjin picks a big fatso to lock lips with his man. Ranjin decides to once again double his pleasure and encourages Khali to let him pick another girl for their sexy party. He settles on another "beauty" and the demure giant eventually makes their (or at least, Ranjin's) dreams comes true, first with some one-on-one, and then with some boner inducing doubles action.

MVP, who had been watching all this from the aisle, decides he's seen enough and runs in to hit Khali with some forearms that barely go noticed, before hightailing it to the back. Vickie Guerrero is watching in her office and likes what she just saw, so much so that it has her questioning whether or not she could have chosen a better big man to do her bidding. This causes the always sensitive Big Show to take off before anyone sees him tear up. His vacancy in the room is filled by MVP, who is unhappy with the sexy interruption of his VIP lounge. Vickie makes him a match tonight against Khali, a bittersweet contest for those of us who lament MVP's losing ways and celebrate the Great Khali's sudden, sexy resurgence.


United States title match: R-Truth vs (champion) Shelton Benjamin

R-Truth back suplexes out of a headlock, followed by a fancy reversal sequence that sees Benjamin take over. Shelton hits a rib breaker and keeps hold of Truth, turning it into a submission. Truth breaks free and hits a clothesline, followed by a fancy kick for 1. Shelton takes over, but a spinning corkscrew forearm out of nowhere gets a big pop and a 2. Benjamin goes up but lands right into a kick to the gut and rolls to the outside. Truth launches himself over the top onto Shelton and goes up to hit a missile dropkick for 2 back inside. Shelton counters a suplex to the outside by hanging Truth up on the ropes and hits Paydirt out of nowhere moments later for the win.

Shelton pinned R
Though I'm thrilled that Shelton retained and the WWE has seemingly decided to not cram Truth down our throats, this needed more time if it ever was going to be anything more than OK. Still this was a much better, longer match than the one they had a few weeks ago. **3/4


THE Brian Kendrick w/Zeke confronts Jimmy Wang Yang and quotes some Pulp Fiction at him.

Zeke w/THE Brian Kendrick vs Jimmy Wang Yang

Jimmy loses a brawl but uses his fast feet to take over before getting floored with a shoulderblock. Zeke mauls him some more and plants him with the release Uranage for the win. Kendrick runs in and hits The Kendrick afterwards, because despite what the flashy jacket might say, he is a very small man.

Zeke pinned Yang
Squash. 1/2*


Michelle McCool is with some chick, where she drops a few candid and catty remarks about Maria. Maria happens to show up and Michelle zips it. I guess Michelle is set to become the bitchy "elitist" heel, but Maria is a bit of ditz and she sucks in the ring, so my allegiance shall lay with McCool.


Jeff Hardy is in the back sucking up to Vickie for another title shot. She totally burns him, saying he's not even that extreme anymore and to go get ready for his tag match, which is what he does best anyway. Man, Vickie is a total ball buster tonight!

Triple H and Jeff Hardy vs Miz & Morrison

Triple H hits the suplex on John and tags in Jeff, who goes for the Twist of Fate. Morrison shoves it off, but gets dispatched to the outside where he and his partner are hit with a flying splash over the top rope as we head to commercial. Back from, with Miz & Jeff duking it out. Jeff hits the leg drop to the balls for 2 but gets distracted by Morrison and knocked off the apron. Jeff makes it back in and assumes the face-in-peril position.

Jeff eventually comes back but refuses to make the hot tag and sidesteps a Miz corner clothesline to hit his fancy corner dropkick and a Whisper in the Wind for 2. Jeff counters a Reality Check to a facebuster, takes off his shirt and goes to the top. Miz comes over for the distraction, causing Hunter to run in and clean house. Jeff retrieves a chair and unloads on Miz & Morrison for the blatant DQ. Proving that he can out petty Kendrick, Hunter delivers a Pedigree to the Miz after.

Miz & Morrison won by DQ
Good match, and Jeff did a great job wearing his hang-ups on his sleeve. And it was cheap, but M & M get bragging rights over two of the top stars. **3/4

Jeff gets in Vickie's face, and she gives him a little extreme credit, though not enough to buy a WWE title shot with.

Big Show comes out to ask Undertaker to save the last dance for him and think about him before he goes to bed tonight. Awwww. He's figured out the secret to Undertaker's powers: he doesn't have any. Whaaa? My mind is being blown here. But if the Undertaker doesn't have any magical powers, how did he get such a great match out of the Big Show at Cyber Sunday? And how did he do all that other stuff, like continually rise from the dead, or make the lights in the arena go off and on? Big Show is a big fat liar. Show challenges Undertaker to a casket match at Survivor Series, because he's figured out that Taker hardly wins any of them. Hmmmm, can it top their Last Man Standing match? I guess we'll see, but I think these two should have gone out on top, so to speak.


MVP & The Great Khali

MVP charges right into a shoulderblock. Clothesline! Khali goes on the attack in the corner. Montel turns it around and charges but runs right into the Brain Chop. Khali slaps on the head vice and lifts him up for the Khali Bomb. Oooh, the triple finisher treatment.

Khali pinned MVP
Ska-Wash! 1/2*


Brie Bella vs Victoria w/Natalya

Victoria takes her down with a headlock, but Brie eventually does an awkward flippy thing out of it. Vic punishes her with a Hangwomen's chokehold and hits her fancy sidewalk slam for 2. She goes for a standing moonsault but Brie gets her knees up and takes over with a monkey flip. Bella comes off the top, Vic catches her and slams her for 2 and Brie gets a small package out of nowhere for the win.

Brie Bella pinned Victoria
Crap, and worse yet, crap we've seen many times over. 1/2*

After the match, Brie gets exposed for being the filthy twin that she is when Nattie and Vic each yank one of the Bellas out from under the ring. So they've finally let the cat out of the bag and Carlito and Primo thinks that's cool! They would, wouldn't they?


Vladimir Kozlov vs The Undertaker

Koz and Taker take turns headlocking and shoulderblocking each other down. Vlad gets caught with a big boot and Taker clotheslines him to the floor, where he follows that up with a fancy apron leg drop. Back inside, Koz powers him into the corner and makes with the firsts but gets caught with a clothesline for 2. Vlad counters an irish whip to a a belly-to-belly and takes the action back to corner. They trade blows, Vlad takes over with a knee to the gut, hooks arms and it's headbutt city! Koz gets 2 off a kick to the sternum and lands more blows in the corner.

Taker reverses the tide and hits a big corner splash, followed by Snake Eyes. Taker charges, and gets caught with powerslam. Vlad looks to scoop him up but gets caught with the gogolplata, which J.R. calls the Devil's Triangle, and which the referee says he can't use. The legality of the move becomes a moot point, as Jeff Hardy shows up for the EXTREME run-in and waffles Vlad with the chair. He nails Taker for good measure, before taking off, leaving the Dead Man to sit up and hit the Moscow Mauler with a chokeslam.

Kozlov won via DQ
Nobody loves a main event DQ finish, but it worked in this case, as I don't think Vlad is ready for, or needs, a real win over Taker, especially if he is just going to go on to lose at Survivor Series. Not terrible, not great, with lots and lots of punching. **1/4.

Jeff runs to Vickie and proves how extreme he still is by requesting an extreme rules match against Taker. Vickie says it's on like Cheech & Chong...next week!


The Dope:

Smackdown has really been strong in crafting episodic storylines that make you want to watch next week instead of just resigning yourself to the inevitability. This week was no different, as Jeff's pursuit of title matches and extreme credibility crescendoed with his losing it and an exciting match being made for next week.

It's also nice to see Khali continue his surprising ascent from random Kiss Cam host to opening segment dynamo and we managed to get both Benjamin and Kendrick on the show at the same time. With their every other week appearances, I was beginning to think they might have been the same man. Throw in a few decent, if unspectacular matches, and I'd say this was an easy 3.


4= Super Crazy
3= Paul London
2= Chuck Palumbo
1= Hardcore Holly (What? There's a good chance he'll be gone by the time this goes to press)

C U Next Time!