Dark Pegasus Video Review: The Best of Smackdown (Disc Three)

Posted by J.D. Dunn on 09.11.2009

A fitting day to post the #1 moment.

The Best of Smackdown: Disc Three

by J.D. Dunn
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Your hosts are Michael Cole and Matt Striker.

#39 – Motherslapper (03/23/00): Stephanie calls Linda a "conniving bitch" and slaps her.

#38 – A Celebration to Remember (02/19/04): I mentioned that Jeff Hardy's victory celebration was probably the biggest since Eddy's. Well, here's Eddy's. Great moment.

#37 – Big Show Returns (09/09/04): Eddy and Kurt Angle were having a lumberjack match on Smackdown. Things broke down, leading to the Big Show coming back and destroying everyone. Funny seeing John Cena getting manhandled.

#36 – Sexy Kurt (03/24/05): In an effort to get inside Shawn Michaels' head, he brings out the late Sensational Sherri to sing along with him. I'll refrain from commenting out of respect for the dead and crazy.

#35 – WWF Tag Team Titles: The New Age Outlaws vs. The Rock 'n' Sock Connection (10/14/99).
This is supposed to be the last match ever for the Rock 'n' Sock Connection. Man, Mick's choice of tie was unfortunate. So it was either the WWF logo or Chris Benoit's picture. Rock and Billy renew acquaintances. Can you believe there was a time when Rock was supposed to get him over? Things break down, so *two* referees get involved. Road Dogg suckerpunches Mankind and signals for the doin'-it-da-butt-slam. Rock breaks it up, but Mankind is your face-in-peril. Billy piledrives him, which looks brutal now that you don't see them every day. Rock gets the hot tag and Rock Bottoms Billy. Roadie makes the save but eats Socko. Fameasser to Mankind. Crash Holly tries to attack Billy but hits Mankind instead. Hardcore Holly does it right and waffles Billy with the title belt. Mankind rolls over and gets the win and the titles at 8:29. The Hollys were supposed to face the New Age Outlaws, so they just screwed themselves out of a tag title shot. No one ever accused them of being smart. The Rock, who though he had gotten rid of Mankind, is now stuck with him because they're tag team champions together. Oh, the hilarity. **

#34 – Houdini of Hardcore: Crash Holly won the Hardcore Title leading to the 24/7 rule and a series of skits with him defending the title at Funtime USA.

#33 – Mysterio Flies (07/25/02). This was just after Mysterio's WWE debut. Edge and Jericho, future tag champions together, were involved in a bitter feud. At the end of the match, the Un-Americans attacked Edge. That led to Mysterio coming out to dive off the cage onto Christian and Lance Storm.

#32 – Undertaker's Revenge (09/26/08): According to Vickie, Undertaker thre'ened to take her soul. In fairness, he did threaten to choke her to death with one hand.

#31 – Divorce Court: Vince was so angry about Linda McMahon siding with Mick Foley that he screamed that he wanted a divorce. Linda was so distraught that she had a nervous breakdown and went to a sanitarium where he had her medicated. Even though she was unresponsive, she could see and hear him boinking Trish Stratus. Christian: "I guess it's not cheating if you're wife's standing there watching you." Stephanie says both she and Shane gagged.

#30 – Kurt Angle vs. John Cena (06/27/02):
Kurt Angle is so drunk with power off his victory over Hulk Hogan that he challenges anyone from the locker room to come out and face him. John Cena, yet another member of the Class of '02, makes his WWF debut and slaps Kurt upside the head. Cena clotheslines Angle over the top and hits the Stinger Splash for two. Kurt goes for the Anklelock, but Cena rolls through. Angle breaks his momentum with the German Suplex. Cena counters another to a rollup for two. Angle freaks out and grounds the match with the front facelock. Cena powers out of it and hits a flying forearm a la Shawn Michaels. That sets up a spinebuster and a DDT. ONE, TWO, THRE-NO! Small package. ONE, TWO, THRE-NO! Angle says, "To hell with this," and pins Cena with a double-chickenwing at 5:37. And with this auspicious start, John Cena's career kicked off. The rapper gimmick would follow later in the year and get him over to the point where he annoyed the hell out of people with his milk-and-vitamins marine act. This was about as good as you can get coming in cold with just five minutes, though. **1/2

#29 – Icon Destruction (08/08/02): This is about as close to dominated as you will ever see Hogan get. Heyman breaks up his usual comeback, leading to the F5 and a bearhug that squeezes the Rogaine and Neutrogena Natural Glow out of Hogan's body.

#28 – Get in My Belly (04/13/00): For whatever reason, Big Show decided to be a goof in early 2000, leading to the Immortal Showster and this skit in which he dresses up as Fat Bastard.

#27 – Bald is Beautiful (06/13/02): Angle got his head shaved by Edge earlier in the year and adopted the Buddy Roberts tack of trying to disguise it with a wig and his wrestling headgear. Eventually, HHH and Hulk Hogan (HHHHH?) cornered him and ripped off the headgear exposing ::gasp:: a bald head.

#26 – Border Patrol (4/08/04): JBL was feuding with Eddy Guerrero over the World Title, so JBL snuck down to the U.S./Mexico border to attack a bunch of people sneaking into the U.S.. Of course, it's possible their car just broke down and they were looking for a ride. "YOU TELL EVERYBODY SOUTH OF THE BORDER, THEY BETTER STAY SOUTH OF THE BORDER BECAUSE JOHN BRADSHAW LAYFIELD WILL BE WAITING!"

#25 – Handicap Match, No DQ: Big Show vs. Stephanie McMahon & Zack Gowan (07/03/03).
If Stephanie and Zack win, Zack gets a contract. If not, he's back in the indies. This leads to the ridiculous sight gag of Big Show having to sell for Zack Gowan. I mean, Stephanie I can understand. She's got some weight to her. Gowan *might* weigh 150 with his prosthetic leg. Show chokeslams Gowan and lets Vince step on his throat. Stephanie saves and is about to get chokeslammed, but Kurt Angle makes the save. Vince nails Kurt with a chair, but here comes Brock Lesnar to jump Vince. Oh, but Show saves *him*. I'm thinking this is getting too convoluted. F5 to Big Show after all the shenanigans. That sets up Gowan's one-legged moonsault on Show for the win and the contract at 4:44. Eventually, Gowan's presence became all about Stephanie and her father, which is actually fine by me because it was more interesting than heels picking on an amputee. *3/4

#24 – Right Place, Wrong Time (07/27/00): So Hunter and Stephanie are just hanging out backstage when Commissioner Foley puts HHH in a mixed-tag match with Trish Stratus as his partner. HHH tries to give Trish some pointers and winds up looking like he's boning her in the pooper when, wouldn't you know it, Stephanie just happens to walk in.

#23 – Ultimate Opportunist (05/11/07): After a grueling cage match between Batista and the Undertaker over the World Title, Edge cashed in his "Money in the Bank" title opportunity and defeated the Undertaker to win the title.

#22 – Angle vs. Lesnar (09/18/03). This is all we get of the Iron Man match. Just a series of clips.

#21 – DX-Plosion (04/27/00): The Rock guaran-damn-tees Austin will return from injury to face the McMahon-Helmsley facgime. Austin shows up outside and destroys the DX Express. Striker explains that Austin does all the things people want to do – like slapping their boss or blowing up their boss' car. Jesus Christ, what kind of people do they think we are?

#20 – Batista Forfeits Title (01/13/06): Batista gets injured and has to forfeit the title, which leads to a battle royal with surprise entrant Kurt Angle (with manager Daivari). It comes down to Angle and Mark Henry (with manager Melina). Angle wins and becomes champion once again. Weird managerial relationships back in late 05/early 06.

#19 – People's Elbow (09/30/99). The Rock is selected as the special referee between HHH and the British Bulldog. Instead of doing that, though, Rock stops to do commentary and mugs for the crowd. This led to the sliding People's Elbow on the Bulldog.

#18 – WWE Tag Team Titles: Billy & Chuck vs. Edge & Hulk Hogan (07/04/02).
Edge has been elevated to honorary American for the holiday. Hogan and Edge dominate early, and Hogan is hugely over in front of the Boston crowd. Chucky finally hits a belly-to-belly to give the champs the advantage. Rico accidentally tags his own man with a superkick, but Billy spikes Edge's face into the ring steps. "Call me 'Billy Bitchcakes,' will ya!" Edge sunset flips Chuck but can't quite… make… the tag. Hogan cleans house with the usual, but Chuck tags him with a superkick to break up the legdrop. Edge tags back in and hits Chuck with the Edgecution. Rico trips up Edge from the outside but gets taken out by Hogan. Edge recovers and spears Billy, but Chuck pulls him off. The challengers hit double boots and double legdrops for the win and the titles at 10:04. Feel good moment for us Americans, who finally vanquished those evil… quasi-gay Americans… with the help of a Canadian. ***

#17 – Kurt Kisses Stephanie (08/24/00): As with many angles involving Stephanie, they usually end up with her getting kissed against her will and slowly melting into sweet, sweet passion. This came about when Rock and Lita took on Kurt Angle and Stephanie. During the match, Stephanie got knocked off the apron and carried to the back. Angle ducked out when HHH came out to help him. Stephanie, lying semi-conscious in the back, was easy pickings for Kurt's sexual advances. Kind of puts that Rhaka Khan thing in perspective.

#16 – JBL vs. Dollzilla (02/10/05): JBL tried to replicate Angle's success with the tranq gun, but that incompetent Amy Weber accidentally shot JBL with the tranquilizer. That led to a drunken JBL attacking an inflatable lizard. "JBL stands for 'just beat a lizard.'" "Big Show is a lizard. His name's Barney. He eats pizza." Silly stuff.

#15 – TLC III (05/24/01). Again, just clips, but this time for a more obvious reason. The whole thing is available on the ladder match DVD.

#14 – Blockbuster Champ (11/11/99): Vince McMahon brings in Arnold Schwarzenegger to present him with an honorary title. Arnie gushes about Vince. Michael Cole gushes about Arnie. I move on to the next chapter.

#13 – Intercontinental Title: Triple H vs. Jeff Hardy (04/12/01).
The Two-Man Powertrip had a mini-feud going on with the Hardyz and Lita, including a VICIOUS beatdown where Steve Austin beat Lita like she was… well, Debra. Jeff gave Stephanie the Twist of Fate in retaliation, so Hunter was irate and wanted Jeff in the ring. Hunter had just won the IC Title from Jericho, which started a trend of the title bouncing all around until it was meaningless because no one ever feuded over it, they just traded it. It's still that way today, actually. Anyway, this goes like every other Jeff Hardy match. Hunter shoves him around and beats on him, but Jeff hits the occasional big move to pop the crowd. Hunter blocks the rail run with a belly-to-belly suplex. Jeff reverses a whip and comes off the apron, but Hunter powerslams him on the floor. Hunter takes over back in and whips Jeff hard into the corner. Jeff hits a Russian Leg Sweep (possibly the worst in the business) and goes up. Hunter shoves the ref into the rope, crotching Jeff. The ref gives him what-for, so Hunter shoves him down and goes for a superplex. That brings out Matt Hardy (who was supposed to be recuperating at home) to nail the Game with a chairshot to the face. One Swanton later and we have a new IC Champion at 8:07. The match is a great example of what Jeff does best – take a beating. Pre-injury HHH is awesome as always, and it was a nice moment, even if it would be short-lived. I would have liked to have seen the WWF just do this feud on PPV instead of the tired Brothers of Destruction versus Two-Man Powertrip matches. **1/2

#12 – Champion Chairman (09/16/99): Hunter wanted a piece of Vince, so he put the title on the line. Vince: "I beat the holy hell out of HHH, and it was easy to do." At the last minute, Steve Austin did the run-in thing and Stunnered HHH. Vince was on top, so Shane counted three and gave Vince the WWF Title… and WCW fans exploded as they thought this would turn the tide back to WCW. Uh huh.

#11 – Thuganomics: Cena spent most of his Smackdown time as an edgy rapper. I miss this Cena.

#10 – Tribute to the Troops: This has become a yearly tradition and one of the nicest ones.

#09 – Supermarket Brawl (12/13/01). Oy. This is the fight between Steve Austin and Booker T that takes place in the Green Frog supermarket. Some people love this, I thought it dragged on way too long for the jokey premise.

#08 – Edge vs. Eddy Guerrero (09/26/02).
Ah yes, this match. Back and forth action early. Some woman in the crowd provides a really distracting scream until some industrious fan shoots her in the neck with a poison dart… hopefully. Eddy grabs a chinlock, but Edge fights out of it and hits a powerslam. Edge goes up, but Eddy catches him with a superplex for two. Eddy fires away and hops on Edge's shoulders, but Edge drops him on the top rope and pulls out a ladder. He charges with it like a battering ram but knocks out the referee. EPIC BUMP~! Eddy jumps Edge from behind and tosses him back in, but he misses the frogsplash as we go to break. When we come back, Eddy is stomping Edge down in the corner. We have a new ref, and no one is even bothering to check on the health of the first one. Finally, the other refs come down as Eddy calms things down with a sleeper. We learn that Edge hit a spear during the break. Edge goes up, but Eddy catches him with a huracanrana. ONE, TWO, THR-NO! Eddy is pissed now, and he pummels Edge from a wristlock position. That sets up a springboard huracanrana attempt, but Edge counters to a SICKENING powerbomb. Eddy's head bounced around on that one. Edge can't cover but goes out and gets the ladder. Eddy dropkicks it back into Edge and goes out to pick up another ladder. Eddy sandwiches Edge in between the ladders and delivers the slingshot senton into the ladder. Eddy gets two off that, even though Edge's shoulders are on the ladder. That's kind of stupid, but not as stupid as getting a pin on the top of a Hell in a Cell. Eddy sets up the ladder and goes up. Edge catches up with him, and they slug it out. The fans inch toward the edge of their seats, and they're not disappointed as Eddy hits a sunset bomb off the top of the ladder! ONE, TWO, THRE-NO! Eddy sets Edge up in the corner with a ladder and charges, but Edge backdrops him into the ladder! Eddy lands right on his neck. Edge sets up a ladder in the opposite corner for some reason, but Eddy catches him. This time, Edge wins the slugfest on the top of the ladder and hits the EDGECUTION OFF THE TOP! ONE, TWO, THREE! Edge finally polishes off the feud at 16:42. Awesome match for free TV, and it probably would have been the MOTY had "the Smackdown Six" not been on such a tear during the last half of 2002. Eddy gets a standing ovation in the loss. Eddy had momentum coming out of this, and the feud served its purpose of making both guys viable main eventers for WWE Blue, but they shoved Eddy back into a tag team with Chavo for nearly a year instead. ****1/2

#7 – The Rock Says…: We see some of the classic Rock moments including forcing Coach to sing "Copa Cabana" and teasing Lillian about his strudel.

#6 – Funeral Crasher (11/11/99): Really?! CM Punk calls this a youtube classic. We catch up with Big Show at his dad's funeral. The Big Boss Man storms the funeral and drags the casket – and Big Show – along behind the car.

#5 – Austin & Angle – Unplugged (07/12/01): You requested it earlier. Here it is. The bizarre father-son-younger-son dynamic between Vince, Austin and Kurt Angle is just creepy. Austin's intense "Kumbaya" is hard not to crack up at, though. Look at the look in his eyes!

#4 – The Pilot (04/29/99): Raw was riding sky high, and the WWF wanted to move to network TV, so they taped a special for UPN. That led to Smackdown becoming a regular series.

#3 – WWF Title: Triple H (w/Chyna) vs. The Rock (09/26/99).
Shawn Michaels is your special guest referee, and no one knows where he stands with HHH given that it changed every few weeks back then. They both go for their finishers early, and both counter. They brawl up to the entrance ramp where Rock gives HHH the Russian Leg Sweep. Rock starts dominating, so Chyna goes low on him, earning her an ejection. No, I said "ejection." If you're not already drunk, take a drink every time Jim Ross drops Jesse Ventura's name. Back in, Rock hits the People's DDT, but Shawn is arguing with Chyna. Shane McMahon runs down to admonish Shawn for not doing his job. Rock fights out of a chinlock and hotshots HHH, but Shane has Michaels distracted. ROCK BOTTOM! That sets up the People's Elbow, but Shawn suddenly steps in with Sweet Chin Music. Hunter recovers and hits the Pedigree at 9:40. Pretty typical of the Rock/Hunter matches outside of the superkick. Big moment to kick off Smackdown. **1/2

#2 - The Bigger They Are (06/12/03): Brock Lesnar was fighting Big Show, and at the end of the show, Lesnar sets Big Show on top for the superplex. SUPERPLEX! The ring collapses under the impact, earning a HUGE ovation from the crowd. I think everyone remembers that one.

#1 – 9/13/01: Striker exaggerates somewhat by calling this "the first public gathering of any kind." I believe it was the first of its size. Some people will like this placement. Some will hate it. CM Punk's thoughts are interesting because he was an outsider just watching like the rest of us. (I think Ivory's comments on the show are beautiful, by the way.)

The 411: Kind of a mixed bag on this one due to the format. Obviously, excising all but the slightest mention of Chris Benoit hurts the set since he was a big part of the show from 2002-2004 and again from 2005-2007. I would have rather seen the Top 50 or so and included Lesnar vs. Angle and some others. As it is, it plays like a forum discussion labeled "Remember the time on Smackdown When…" They never get too in-depth on anything, but they never overstay their welcome either. It's not something you need to put on your shelf in case you want to watch a specific match or moment, but it is a good time waster, and it would probably make a good one-time rental.

Thumbs up.

Final Score:  7.5   [ Good ]