Ring Crew Reviews: WWE Survivor Series 2008

• Scheduled Card:
1. Traditional Survivor Series Elimination Match: Team HBK (Shawn Michaels, Cryme Tyme, Great Khali, and Rey Mysterio) vs. Team JBL (JBL, MVP, The Miz, John Morrison, and Kane).
2. Smackdown vs. RAW Divas Traditional Survivor Series Tag Team Elimination Match: Michelle McCool, Maryse, Natayla, Victoria and Maria vs. Beth Phoenix, Mickie James, Jillian Hall, Candice Michelle, and Kelly Kelly.
3. Casket Match: The Big Show vs. The Undertaker.
4. Traditional Survivor Series Elimination Match: Team Batista (Batista, R-Truth, CM Punk, Kofi Kingston, Matt Hary) vs. Team Orton (Randy Orton, Cody Rhodes, Shelton Benjamin, Mark Henry, and William Regal).
5. Triple Threat Match for the WWE Championship: Jeff Hardy vs. Koslov vs. Triple H (c).
6. World Heavyweight Championship: John Cena vs. Chris Jericho (c).

• Video package starts out with the typical talk of survival and the history of the PPV. Then, it focuses just on Cena and his return from injury only to be interrupted by Chris Jericho’s Save Us vignette. Jericho says he will show Cena that not every story has a happy ending.

• JR immediately opens us and gives us an update on Jeff Hardy being found unconscious at his hotel, kayfabe of course.

• Traditional Survivor Series Elimination Match: Team HBK (Shawn Michaels, Cryme Tyme, Great Khali, and Rey Mysterio) vs. Team JBL (JBL, MVP, The Miz, John Morrison, and Kane). Not a lot of storyline here other than beef between JBL and HBK and Kane mocking JBL’s leadership. Of note, we have all three commentary teams on this one just in case there wasn’t enough going on. Rey and MVP to start. MVP with some knees. They note he is currently on his VERY long losing streak. MVP tries a flapjack but Mysterio gets a rana and a dropkick for 1. JTG comes in and he and Rey get some combo kicks for 2. MVP comes back with a basement dropkick and the Drive-By and JTG is out at 1:41.

• MVP celebrates early but Khali is in and chops him down with the BRAINCHOP. Khali covers and MVP’s gone at 1:55.

• Kane rises to the challenge. Khali talks some Punjab trash and clotheslines Kane down. Khali chokes in the corner and hits some elbows. KHALI! KHALI! KHALI! Kane no sells and goozles him. Khali breaks the hold, hits the Brain Chop and tags in Mysterio. Mysterio off Khali’s shoulders with the splash and Kane’s out at 3:26.

• Morrison in and boots down Mysterio. Mysterio avoids a charge by getting the boot up and hits a violent headscissors. He tags in Shad who whips Mysterio into Morrison. Shad with a press slam. He tries a charge but Morrison dropkicks the knee into the turnbuckle. Miz in and he and Morrison work some quick tags but Shad hits a double clothesline and a running back elbow. Shad with a Bulldog powerslam and drops an elbow as all six of the announcers continue namedropping 80s musical stars like Captain and Tenille, Tears for Fears, and Bruce Springsteen. Morrison distracts and that allows Miz to hit with the knee/neckbreaker combo Reality Check for the 3 at 6:31.

• HBK and Miz now. HBK with some chops but Miz hits the corner clothesline. Miz catapults him into a shot from Morrison and then Morrison slingshots in with an elbow for 2. JBL in to boos. He pounds down HBK. JBL with a neckbreaker and an elbow drop for 2. Miz in with more rights for 2. Miz with some GnP and HBK has a bloody eye probably from JBL’s shots. Morrison in and goes to a chinlock. Morrison tries to shitcan HBK but he skins the cat. Morrison with a flying burrito and kips up to boos. That’s gimmick infringement. Morrison with a body slam and goes for the Macho elbow but HBK avoids. Mysterio in and Miz in. Mysterio with a seated senton and a springboard rana. Miz backdrops him but Rey lands on the apron and dropkicks Miz into the ropes. 619 and a splash later and Miz it out at 11:46.

• Morrison now and Rey headscissors him from behind into the ropes as well (!). JBL with the blind tag and plows over Mysterio as he goes for the 619. Nice misdirection. JBL with a Batista kick and some elbows for 2. Crowd tells JBL he can’t wrestle but he ignores them and tags in Morrison. Morrison chokes and hits a backbreaker and bridges it for the submission attempt. Mysterio escapes and tries the wheelbarrow/bulldog counter but Morrison counters BACK to a backbreaker. Nice! JBL in and now goes to the ab stretch while holding the leg. Rey: “AHHHH! SHIT! AHHHHHHHH!” Rey kicks his way free but gets sent into the turnbuckle and boots to the head even though JBL almost ghosted him. JBL puts him up top. JBL wants a suplex but Rey blocks and elbows him off the top. Mysterio with a moonsault but is too out of it to cover. Rey makes the tag to HBK. He’s in with chops and a flying burrito of his own. He kips up and tells Morrison to suck it. HBK with an inverted atomic drop and heads up for the Macho elbow. He knocks Morrison off the ropes first. That allows JBL to roll to the floor but HBK hits a plancha on him. HBK teases a SCM but JBL ducks around. HBK slides in to beat the count and JBL’s out at 17:55. Nice unexpected booking of that exit.

• Morrison is behind HBK and tries his own Sweet Chin Music but HBK ducks and lays him out with the real deal. The faces take it at 18:16. Well worked. The match didn’t really get into a groove until HBK got in the ring and the story kicked in with HBK/JBL, HBK/Morrison and JBL/Rey. Strong second half with good booking. ***1/4

• Meanwhile, Triple H is in the back with Eve Torres. She wants to know what he thinks about “this Jeff Hardy situation.” Trips says that Jeff will likely be back in no time but instead tonight, it’ll be him vs. Koslov one on one. Crowd boos that announcement. He says that Koslov is big, bad and undefeated but he hasn’t been on this level before and tonight he’ll lose for the first time.

• Smackdown vs. RAW Divas Traditional Survivor Series Tag Team Elimination Match: Michelle McCool, Maryse, Natayla, Victoria and Maria vs. Beth Phoenix, Mickie James, Jillian Hall, Candice Michelle, and Kelly Kelly. Seeing this match with “tradition” in the stipulation is laughable. King: “Have you ever noticed how Kelly Kelly’s clothes are like barb wire: they protect the property without obstructing the view?” JR: “I can tell you there are no chaps like that in Oklahoma. I have searched high and low.” Beth and McCool to start. McCool kips out of a top wristlock and then gets a nifty headscissors. Beth shakes off some stuff and shoves McCool into the corner. Maryse tags herself in and then shoves McCool down. The whole crew of Smackdown ladies jump each other to separate the two. Maria now tags herself in. Beth boots her and gets a choke toss into the corner. Beth whiffs on a charge and Maria now hits a headscissors. Beth no sells and KK tags in for a sunset flip for nothing. Maria switches to a roll up for 1. They go through a roll up sequence for several 1 counts. Victoria now tags herself in only to get ranaed and pinned for the 3 at 2:54.

• KK goes for it again on Maryse but she kicks out at 2. Maryse with a Black Hole Slam backbreaker and KK’s out at 3:23.

• MJ clotheslines her down a few times and taunts. Maryse gets an elbow up in the corner and then tags in McCool. MJ shoots for a single and they do the Flair/Steamboat sequence and a Northern Lights bridge sequence for 2. McCool with a tiltawhirl Russian legsweep for 2. This is some nice chain wrestling if ultimately meaningless given the match it’s being performed in. MJ counters a whip with a burrito. Maria breaks up the corner but McCool’s pissed at her. MJ gets the DDT from behind and McCool’s out at 5:06.

• Maryse in with a school girl and MJ’s out at 5:27.

• Candace in but Natayla tags in as well. Natayla shoves her down and hooks in a Sharpshooter to a pop. Candace tries for the ropes but Julian breaks it up. Candace with a Spear and Natayla is eliminated at 6:44.

• Maria and Jillian in. Jillian with a Samoan drop for 2. They botch a whip and then Jillian hits a handspring elbow. Maria with a victory roll and Jillian’s out at 7:45.

• Candace runs in but he knee buckles! YEAH! She’s actually SELLING the damn Sharpshooter from Natayla. That’s worth a * upgrade right there. Maria front facelocks her but Candace gets a Northern Lights and bridges for the cover WHILE SELLING THE LEG for the 3 at 7:55.

• Maryse sinks weakness and knocks Beth off the apron. JR: “SHADES OF PAT PATTERSON, WWE HALL OF FAMER!” Maryse hooks in a Figure Four and Candace taps out at 8:38.

• Maryse with a sidekick for 2. Maryse tries a crossbody but Beth catches her. Maryse slides out and gets a school girl for 2. Maryse wants a DDT but Beth counters to the Glam Slam to win it at 9:39. Well, there was some quality chain sequences in there from almost everyone involved including plenty that get a knock for not being able to do jackshit in the ring. It’s just a collection of moves and a glorified group of singles exhibitions with each one taking a pin after a minute, but there was a lot of effort in this. **

• Matt Hardy is in the back with Todd Grisham. He gives an update on Jeff and doesn’t say much of note. Todd wants him to get specific, but Matt hides behind “I don’t know.”

• Casket Match: The Big Show vs. The Undertaker. In the package, Show says he realizes that UT gets his power from fear and he’s not afraid. Instead, UT should be afraid of his KO power. The casket gets its own entrance and druids. JR namedrops Kamala, the Ugandan giant. Taz: “I’m wondering if Undertaker is going to take Big Show to hell.” JR: “I think that’s on his GPS.”

• UT stares down the casket to start and wants the lid raised. Show with some gutshots and a headbutt. Taker ducks one and Show gets caught up in the ropes and almost winds up in the casket. Instead, he rolls to the floor. UT follows with shots but Show comes him off with more right hands and sends him into the barricade. Show sends him into the announce table now and preps the EAT (ECW announce table). Show with more headbutts and continues moving the furniture. UT recovers to waffle him gingerly with a moment. How nice of him. UT gets on the RAT and gives Show a legdrop through the EAT. They continue walking around slowly to sell. Back in, UT goes to work on the shoulder for Old School but Showster trips him up and hits a superplex. Show follows up with a side slam. Show wants the casket open and rolls UT in. Showster tells the refs to shut the lid but they refuse and say it’s his job. Nice little psychology addition. Show tries but UT gets his leg out. UT with rights and flying burrito. He goes for a Ho Train but Show gets the elbow up. Show goes to the second rope for no reason and then gets ChokeSlammed off. UT tosses him in the casket but Show blocks the lid. Show now gives him the ChokeSlam. He knocks over the casket and says he’s talking a walk. UT with a zombie situp and follows Show up the aisle. Some pyro blocks Show’s exit. The druids come back out with another casket and then leave without incident. Show sends UT into the stage and then into the stood up casket. They slug it out and UT wins that one. UT whips Show into the stood up casket and the lid shuts itself and UT wins at 12:47. That ending was certainly underwhelming but caps off an uneventful casket match as well. The only things of interest were Show’s refusal the shut the casket himself and then the druids bringing another casket out. **

• Carlito and Primo are in the back with the Bellas. He gets them confused and tries to play it off. The Gobbledygooker shows us. They think it’s Charlie under the hood because he was in the middle of parodying anything. But the real Charlie shows up and it turns out it was the Boogeyman. The lights change and his music plays. He stares into the camera with a straight face and says, “Gobble gobble.” MUAHAHAHAHAHA! Yeah.

• Next, Orton, Cody, Shelton, Regal and Mark Henry are in the back. Orton like a true leader says he didn’t have a choice in this and would rather be fighting Jericho for the belt. BUT he’s in this match and says if they want to win, everyone should follow his lead. Cody gives him some lip and Orton takes offense. They almost brawl but are held back by the others.

• Traditional Survivor Series Elimination Match: Team Batista (Batista, R-Truth, CM Punk, Kofi Kingston, Matt Hary) vs. Team Orton (Randy Orton, Cody Rhodes, Shelton Benjamin, Mark Henry, and William Regal). Kofi and Punk are the world tag champs and Punk is still face. Matt is ECW champ. JR reminds us that Orton has been the only survivor 3 years in a row in his SS match. Punk with a Stinger Splash on Regal to start and preps the G2S. He hits it and Regal hits the showers at :12. As Carlito would say, that’s not cool.

• Layla throws a shoe at Punk to show her disdain. Shelton sneaks Punk with a school boy for 2. Punk slides out of a whip and hits a spin kick. Kofi in with a burrito for 2. Shelton flips out of a monkey flip attempt and lands on his feet but gets taken down by a dropkick. Mizark in with some power stuff. Cody in and this time he eats the monkey flip. Matt Hardy in with a back elbow and a elbow drop for 1. R-Truth in now with a double hiptoss for 2. Batista in and Cody bails immediately and tags in Shelton. Shelton with some rights and Batista no sells and hits the BATISTA KICK and a vertical suplex for 2. Batista with some shoulder surges and tags in Matt Hardy. Hardy runs into a back elbow and Orton’s in. Matt with some shots and a clothesline and a bulldog out of the corner for 2. Matt goes up for a moonsault but Orton rolls under and tags in Henry. Henry pounds him down and slingshots him into the ropes. Cody in with up and over and goes for a clothesline but collides with Hardy. Truth and Shelton in. Truth with some rights. Both he and Shelton go for hiptosses but Truth gets an inside rollup for 2. Truth with a leg lariat for 2. Truth with up and over, a split, and the barrel roll burrito. WHATS UP?! ?Shelton avoids a scissors kick and gives him Pay Dirt and Truth’s out at 7:39.

• Kofi in immediately with a crossbody for 2. Kofi with the double chops and a Bluechipper dropkick. Kofi with the Boom Drop for 2. Henry attacks Kofi behind the ref’s back to cut him off. Henry in now and boots Kofi on the back a few times. Orton back in and he goes to the Garvin-Malenko stomp. Orton then hangs him out to dry on the ropes. Orton then gives him the apron DDT and Kofi’s out at 10:35.

• Punk in with kicks on Orton and a leg lariat for 2. Cody in with a Bluechipper dropkick and drop toe holds Punk into a hammerlock. That was slick. Punk with up and over and a crossbody for 2. Punk with a neckbreaker for 2. Punk with a knee lift in the corner and a bulldog coming out for 2. Punk heads up top but Cody knocks him off and hits a DDT and Punk jobs at 13:12.

• Matt Hardy in with a Side Effect for 2. He wants another but Henry tags in. He wants a Ho Train but gets sent into the turnbuckle instead. Matt with an ax handle and a Side Effect for 2. Matt heads up top but gets caught in the World’s Strongest Slam and he’s out at 14:22.

• Now, it’s Batista versus four of the heels. He Spears Henry and sends him to the back at 14:33.

• Shelton in but eats a couple clotheslines and a spinebuster. Batista calls for the DemonBomb and hits it and Shelton’s out at 15:06.

• Cody in but eats a big boot. He heads up top but gets clotheslined down and eats a Bulldog powerslam. Batista talks smack to Orton. Priceless distracts but Batista is still able to get Cody up for the DemonBomb. Orton gets the blind tag from behind though and Cody is no longer legal. Orton slides in from behind while Batista tries to cover. Orton hits the RKO and Team Orton wins it at 16:13. Hot match especially once it was Batista against the slew of the heels. I like this one just a shade better than the opener due to better chemistry between the participants. ***1/2

• In the back, Eve is with Koslov. He speaks not English to boos and then translates to say he will be champ, tonight.

• Triple Threat Match for the WWE Championship: Jeff Hardy vs. Koslov vs. Triple H (c). The video package for this focuses on Jeff’s quest to get one more shot at Triple H and win the belt for the first time. He was coming off a fantastic run in mid 2008 including the promo of his career as a Joker-esque madman. Vickie refused to give him the shot so Jeff went apeshit attacking everyone with chairs. Hardy then beat H on Smackdown with a roll up after Koslov interfered to get in this match. But since Jeff was left lying in a hotel and as Trips announced earlier in the show…

• WWE Championship: Koslov vs. Triple H (c). Koslov out first to mostly indifference. JR says this is Koslov’s PPV debut. At least that way, Trips can’t hide before, “THIS WAS SUPPOSED TO BE AN EXHIBITION!” Alright, this should be a fairly standard victory for the Hs. And here we go. Crowd chants for USA. JR: “I’m assuming not a lot of fans from Russia made the trip over to Boston.” Koslov with a takedown. As Trips works a headlock, JR calls Survivor Series, “a Thanksgiving tradition” which is a fucking sacrilege compared to what Starrcade was but the NWA is mostly dead so there ya go. H tries to do the Bret Hart Dickensian headlock on Koslov by refusing to release the hold but Koslov is no Perfect and instead this induces a “Boring” chant. H with an armdrag as the crowd chants WE WANT HARDY! And LOUD. Koslov goes for the top wristlock but H counters to a hammerlock and drives a knee into the back. Koslov counters to a fireman’s carry takeover but H goes back to the hammerlock. Ya know, despite the unenthusiastic crowd this is some quality matwrestling. Koslov shoves him into the corner and then whiffs on a slow charge. H goes back to the arm. Koslov drives him back into the corner. BORING! BORING! Crowd is killing them for the bait and switch on Hardy moreso than for the wrestling they are seeing. H with a clothesline and a high knee. Trips with a jawbreaker and a DDT. Koslov won’t stay down though. H goes to the rights as a small “TNA” chant breaks out. H sends him across but runs into a boot. He comes back with a spinebuster an the crowd perks up. Trips goes for the Pedigree but Koslov shoves him away and hits the Pounce. Double KO spot. H with some rights but Koslov whips him into the corner for H’s Flair flip. Koslov drives him into the apron a few times and slides him back in. Koslov catches him in the snap ab suplex for 2. Koslov gets double overhooks and headbutts Triple H a few times. Bulldog powerslam gets 2. Koslov goes to the waistlock. Koslov with a ribbreaker for 2 and the crowd is restless for this heat. ANOTHER RIBBREAKER! BACK TO THE WAISTLOCK! Crowd isn’t buying it and chants “Boring” some more. JR: “A mat wrestling match, something we don’t see that often.” Trying to re-educate your audience in the main event of one of the big 4 with a foreign heel who barely speaks English and isn’t over doesn’t sound like the best time to get back to your roots even if I appreciate the effort. Koslov with a powerslam for 2. Koslov is all NAIIIII! Because he doesn’t like the count. Then he goes back to the waistlock. WE WANT HARDY! WE WANT HARDY! If the shoe was on the other foot and they pulled a bait and switch with Trips instead and Hardy as champ was out there bombing (through little fault of his own) with Koslov, they’d bury him big time. H tries to break the waistlock but Koslov goes low and hits a belly to belly suplex. Koslov whiffs on a charge and eats turnbuckle. H hits the Pedigree but is too out of it to cover. BUT WAIT! VICKIE HAS COME OUT! She gets the stick and says as promised this will be a triple threat match! Crowd loves that. HE’S HERE! HERE HE IS! MY GOODNESS, IT’S EDGE! And with a full on Manson beard. Some of the crowd loves that but you can tell the Hardy-ites are pissed. No contest at 13:00.

• Triple Threat for the WWE Championship: Koslov vs. Edge vs. Triple H (c). Edge with a Spear on Triple H. He goes for the cover but JEFF HARDY HAS COME OUT! He goes crazy on Edge and gets a chair. He swings for Edge but takes out Trips instead and then waffles Koslov. Crowd is on fire for all this. He goes for Edge again but eats a Spear. Edge covers Triple H and wins the belt at 1:20 or 14:20 for the whole thing. In terms of random Edge returns and title victories, this is somewhere in the middle but they are all awesome. But the match itself, despite some commitment to the story and matwrestling from H and Koslov, just never gets off the ground, mainly due to a hostile crowd and Koslov being less than fleet of foot. This is an interesting experiment in crowd sociology that is only saved by the booking kicking in during the last few minute with the run ins. ***

• World Heavyweight Championship: John Cena vs. Chris Jericho (c). So Jericho won the title at Unforgiven in a scramble match and then retained against HBK in a fantastic ladder match. Jericho was on fire at this point and at this most epically douchey. Of course, Cena is returning from an injury and walks into the title shot. The video package makes Jericho and his run with HBK seem like an afterthought in the equation. Jericho out first and Cole plays up Jericho’s accomplishments in beating Punk in a cage match and his matches with HBK. Cena out next and Cole says we can “see the emotion pouring out of his veins.” Sure.

• At the bell, Cole and Lawler talk strategy and say that Cena needs to keep his adrenaline in check. Cena goes for the FU immediately and Jericho slides out to the apron. Back in, Jericho grabs a headlock and gets the TD. Cena sends him off but Jericho takes him down with a shoulderblock(!) and Cena bails (!!). How often does that happen in that exchange? Cena barnstorms Jericho now with rights and sends him into the turnbuckle but the botch the boot spot. Cena with a suplex for 1 but now he wants the STF. Jericho rolls out of that too. Jericho sends Cena into the turnbuckle and hits a couple Batista kicks. Cena with a clothesline and an elbow drop for 2. Jericho avoids a charge and Cena eats turnbuckle. Cena comes back with the Throwback and heads up top. He decides against it for some reason and Jericho boots him and hits a double arm DDT for 2. Cena’s out of it and Jericho gives him a Batista kick into the ringpost but only grazes him. Cena collapses and falls to the floor. Chioda threatens to stop the match. He starts the count but Cena beats it at 9. Rather than sell, Cena decides to go full steam ahead and Jericho shitcans him to the floor and hits a NICE dropkick to the head. Jericho sends him into the ring steps. Back in, Jericho with a slingshot splash for 2. Jericho goes to a neck wrench. ASK HIM! ASK HIM! Cena contorts his face and just lays there like a sack of potatoes. Cena breaks the hold and goes for a shoulderblock but Jericho ducks and Cena wipes out. Jericho chokes him in the ropes a few times and goes to the MasterLock. Luckily, Cena brushed up on his Chris Masters tapes and powers out of the hold only for Jericho to reapply. ASK HIM! Cena powers out again. Jericho goes for the bulldog but Cena shoves him into the turnbuckle in a spot that looked horrible due to mistiming. Cena wants the Protobomb but Jericho slides out and hits a bulldog! Jericho wants the Lionsault but Cena avoids and now hits the Protobomb. That’s a nice reversal of the usual orders of each. He wants the 5KS but Jericho jumps him and hooks in the LIONTAMER! YEAHHHHHH! Cena powers out and legwhips Jericho away only to eat a clothesline. Jericho now locks in the Walls of Jericho. Somehow, Cole sells the idea of Cena losing to Jericho in his first match back from surgery as “potentially the most embarrassing moment in John Cena’s career.” Cena fights it for a minute or so and makes the ropes. Cena now with the desperation FU but is too out of it to cover. That’s the exact same spot H and Koslov did. Delayed cover gets 2. Cena and Jericho both jockey for position up top but Cena wins that and hits the Rocker Dropper off the top. He wants an FU but Jericho elbows out and gives him the Codebreaker. Delayed cover gets 2. Jericho clotheslines Cena down and talks smack. Jericho with another clothesline and gloats some more. Jericho tries another and Cena of course moves and drop toe holds him into the STF. Jericho reaches for the ropes but Cena goes to pull him back to the middle so Jericho kicks him in the face(!). Jericho with a small package for 2. Cena kicks out and picks him up for the FU and covers for the win at 21:21. That’s not a bad match; it just feels like a wasted opportunity. They had a lot of elements in place (Cena’s lack of confidence in returning from injury, Jericho outsmarting him and not allowing him to pick up momentum, etc.) for a really, very good match but some selling and chemistry deficiencies prevented it from getting there. Plus at the time, I was really looking forward to a Jericho-HBK continuation into RR and possibly Mania but that was taken off the table for JBL/HBK to invade the world title picture and then Edge to win at EC and him and Showster to fight over Vickie’s love. ***1/4

The 411: Most of the card is hovering around ***+ but nothing is great. Check out if you're an Edge fan for his title unexpected return and victory.
Final Score:  7.0   [ Good ]