Views from the Hawke's Nest: Chikara The Ring of Wax 2012
Posted by TJ Hawke on 09.18.2012
ACH and Mr. Touchdown have one of the best Chikara matches of the year. Buy this show.
August 18, 2012
Commentators: Bryce Remsburg, Gavin Loudspeaker, Jakob Hammermeier, Ophidian, Lancelot Bravado, UltraMantis Black, & Chuck Taylor
The show starts with a backstage promo from The Batiri. Kobald is screaming into the camera about something. Ophidian shows up and says that they are under the guidance of Delirious and that The Batiri will win King of Trios.
Soldier Ant, CombatANT, & DeviANT vs. The Batiri (Obariyon, Kodama, & Kobald) (w/ Ophidian)
This is Wink Vavasseur’s version of The Colony that he created based on his CHIKARAbermetrics. The fake ants and Soldier Ant were not getting along at all as they got prepared for the match. Between The Batiri being positioned as a favorite for King of Trios and the Ants not getting along at all, this match feels awfully predictable.
The Swarm lost the night before when Soldier Ant punched CombatANT. The crowd chants “POW” for Soldier Ant. Promoting Soldier Ant as a “Prisoner of War” is…something. CombatANT hit a big suplex on Kodama for a nearfall. Kodama managed to take CombatANT to the floor with a running body press that took both of them over the top rope. Soldier Ant became the legal man and managed to run through Kodama and Obariyon. The Batiri were eventually able to isolate Soldier Ant, and they worked him over for a while. This heat segment went on longer than I expected. Soldier Ant eventually made his own comeback as The Swarm flipped out on the apron about not being tagged in. Kobald eventually caught Soldier Ant with a spear. Kobald kicked the Swarm off the apron. Kodama then dropped Soldier Ant’s head onto Obariyon’s knee: 1…2…3
CombatANT and DeviANT berated Soldier Ant after the match. The crowd chanted “Not His Fault!” Soldier Ant saluted the crowd.
Given the dynamic of five rudos and one tecnico, I really wasn’t looking forward to this match much, and it seemed like a poor choice for an opener. However, the crowd was really into Soldier Ant, and he worked the majority of the match, so this ended up being much more fun than I would have guessed. On top of that, the match established The Batiri as a very effective trio, and it did a good job of showing the poisonous dynamic that Wink has created. Match Rating: **1/2
Tim Donst vs. Saturyne
Since losing his hair in a match against Hallowicked, Tim Donst has seemingly become suicidal. The night before, Donst cost Jakob his semi-final match in the Young Lion’s Cup tournament.
Saturyne hit a nifty hurricanrana early. She then locked in a wacky armbar, but Donst reversed the submission into a backbreaker. Donst followed that up with another backbreaker on the floor. Donst proceeded to destroy Saturyne. Saturyne managed to low-bridge Donst to the floor, and she then hit a springboard cross-body to the floor. Unfortunately, Saturyne had trouble lifting Donst up to get him back in the ring. She then got ALL of the males in the building to lift him back into the ring. Saturyne then locked in the Chikara Special!!! Donst managed to grab her throat. He then killed her with a buckle bomb. Donst bashed her skull a few more times, before locking in a submission. Saturyne quickly tapped, but Donst didn’t release the hold right away. He grabbed a few pieces of her air before releasing the submission.
Second match in a row that was very entertaining, while also being really effective in telling the important story. Donst has clearly lost his mind, and one has to assume that he is a threat to himself and those whom he encounters in the squared circle. Saturyne is already showing a lot of improvement since she first debuted. This was a very effective match. Match Rating: **1/4
Lancelot Bravado vs. The Mysterious and Handsome Stranger
Word cannot describe my excitement for this match.
There was a pre-match promo that defies reality. Has to be seen to be believed. These are GREAT men. The Stranger was incredibly over. Lancelot threatened to touch Stranger’s hat early, which most definitely drew the ire of this very Mysterious and Handsome Stranger. Lancelot took the Stranger down and put on his hat. Stranger was eventually able to table top Lancelot, and he then rode Lancelot around like a horse. Lancelot tried to charge at Stranger, but Stranger was too quick with his pistol. Lancelot called for a draw. Lancelot tried to jump him again, but the Stranger was again too quick on the draw. Stranger called for a Spinning Toe Hold, but Lancelot sent him into a ring post. Lancelot then got the heat by going after the injured arm/shoulder of Stranger. Stranger eventually came back with some big right hands. Stranger then hit a big atomic drop and an even bigger lariat: 1…2…NO! Stranger then hit three ax handles. Stranger went for a fourth one (and put on his hat), but Lancelot caught him with an armbar. Stranger made the ropes. Stranger then came back with a big boot and a Stroke! Stranger then went for a super leg drop, but Lancelot avoided it and hit a nice shoulder breaker. Lancelot then grabbed Stranger’s bag, but Sapphire was in the bag and pecked away at Lancelot! Stranger then locked in the Spinning Toe Hold! Lancelot taps out!
This is easily one of my favorite Chikara matches of the year. The Mysterious & Handsome Stranger, besides being very mysterious and handsome, is one of the best Chikara creations ever already. Lancelot Bravado also got a chance to shine here, and he and his brother have improved so much. Match Rating: ***1/2
Mike Quackenbush & Jigsaw vs. GEKIDO (17 & The Shard)
These men do not like each other.
Jigsaw started to limp towards the ring, which allowed Quack to jump the rudos from behind (ok…). They fell to the floor, and Quack wiped them out with a somersault plancha. Quack then hit them with an Asai Moonsault. Quack rolled Shard into the ring for Jigsaw. 17 tagged in, and Jigsaw got him in the Gory Special. Quack then hit a double stomp. Quack went for several submissions on 17. Quack and 17 fell to the floor. Jigsaw was in the ring with his injured leg, and The Shard kicked out that injured leg. 17 and Shard then worked over Jigsaw for a while. Jigsaw eventually was able to tag in Quack, who was very, very angry. Shard sent Quack to the floor. Shard went for a rolling senton off the apron, but Quack avoided it and The Shard CRASHED onto the metal ramp. Quack was giddy and called for the kill on 17. Quack hit three versions of the Quackendriver. The referee warned Quack to stop hurting 17 and to just pin him. Quack didn’t listen and hit the Quackendriver I. The referee disqualified Quack and Jigsaw for castigo excesivo.
Quack then got a leglock on 17. All the referees ran down to call Quack off. Jigsaw flipped out at Quack for costing them a chance at tag team title points. The crowd was completely supportive of Quack. 17 had to be carried to the back by other members of GEKIDO.
This was a really good match actually. There was a lot of great action, and all the work in the ring made sense. An unhinged Quackenbush is a different shade of Quack that what we’ve been seeing for a while, and it’s definitely something that I am interested in. 17 being written out of Chikara before a 1v1 match with Quack seems strange though. Quack turning rudo would be amazing as far as I am concerned. I know it’s unlikely to happen, but I think it could be a real shot in the arm of Chikara. Match Rating: ***1/4
The Spectral Envoy (UltraMantis Black & Frightmare) vs. Team Minnesota (Arik Cannon & Darin Corbin)
Yes, I’m still calling them Team Minnesota. Send the hate Chikarmy.
As usual, UltraMantis was very over with the crowd. The teams traded control early on. Corbin managed to hit Frightmare with a double knee gutbuster. AND THEN THE SLOW MOTION WRESTLING KICKED IN! YES! YES! YES! It eventually broke, and the Envoy were in complete control. Corbin hit Black with an assisted Sliced Bread #2 for a nearfall. Corbin then caught Frightmare with an Ace Crusher for another nearfall. Corbin tried to superplex Frightmare, but Black caught Corbin with a powerbomb. Cannon punched Frightmare and gave him a kneeling superkick, but Black then rolled him up: 1…2…3!
This match was so much fun. Not much of substance happened in the match, but we’ve already had plenty of substance on this show. Everything was so crisp and looked so good. Match Rating: **3/4
Eddie Kingston vs. Harlem Bravado
Bravado Bandwagon. Hop on.
There was some very amusing pre-match interactions with the crowd, where the crowd decided that they were willing to chant anything and everything with the exception of “Bravado.” Once they started the action, Kingston was in complete control Kingston was just running through Harlem until the latter ended up on the floor. Harlem then managed to get Kingston’s left knee and drive it into the ring post repeatedly. Harlem proceeded to go after Kingston’s knee. Harlem tried for a leg submission, but Kingston chopped his way out of it. Kingston went for a Backfist, but Harlem avoided it and kicked out the injured leg. Harlem avoided a saito suplex attempt, and he then locked in a STF. Kingston made the ropes. Harlem pulled out the “I’ve got till five,” which displeased the crowd greatly. Kingston got to his feet, and they traded strikes until Harlem kicked the injured leg again. He locked in another submission. Kingston locked in rear naked choke out of nowhere. Harlem almost passed out, but Kingston got bored. Harlem managed to hit a Russian legsweep. Harlem went to the top rope, but Kingston met him up there and hit a super Ace Crusher. Kingston then hit an urinagi for a nearfall. Kingston then hit a short-range lariat: 1…2…NO! Harlem managed to low bridge Kingston to the floor. Harlem followed up with a running knee off the apron. Back in the ring, Harlem hit a tornado DDT for a nearfall. He then locked in a leg submission. Kingston made the ropes. Harlem went for it again, but Kingston got a small package for a nearfall. Kingston then hit a saito suplex and the Backfist To The Future: 1…2…3!
Another really good match. This show is on fire. Both Bravado Brothers had great singles matches on this show, and I would have to imagine that Chikara would use them as singles and tag wrestlers going forward. Match Rating: ***1/2
Friends in Similar Tights and their Waterboy (Chuck Taylor, Matt Dillon Icarus, & Sugar Dunkerton) & Ophidian vs. The Colony (Green Ant & Fire Ant) & 3.0 (Scott Parker & Shane Matthews)
Sugar is not happy about being labeled as a waterboy, but he seems eager to make lemonade out of the lemons they were all given by Wink.
The tecnicos all took big bumps for Icarus revealing his back tattoo. I don’t think I can adequately describe how awesome the shenanigans at the beginning of the match were. Sugar D. and Parker did a lot of dancing while they were in the ring. Ophidian was not impressed. There was a seven person submission spot. Taylor then pulled out a grenade. Everyone scattered, but Matthews jumped on the grenade and swallowed it. Matthews had some nasty indigestion after that. Matthews left the match to go to the bathroom. This match is five stars. The rudos were able to isolate Green Ant after that, and they got the heat on him. Chuck Taylor went to the merch stand and put on a Green Ant mask. Green Ant was eventually able to tag in Fire Ant, who ran wild for a short while. Parker then came into the match. Parker got cut off, and the rudos then worked him over for a while. Finally, Shane Matthews returned to the apron, and Parker was able to tag him in. HEADSCISSORS! Everyone at a headscissors. Even Bryce Remsburg ate a headscissors! The Colony hit Ants Go Marching on Taylor, but Ophidian made the save. Everyone traded all the moves. Eventually, Green Ant hit Icarus with a Superfly Splash and a Drunk Slam variation: 1…2…NO! Green Ant locked Icarus in his version of the Chikara Special. Ophidian locked Green Ant in with the Ophidian Death Grip. They fell to the floor. Fire Ant wiped out a lot of them with a tope suicida. Sugar hit an Asai Back Senton. Taylor hit a tope con hello, but he pretty much overshot everyone. Green Ant then hit a diving plancha to finish off the sequence. Back in the ring, Ophidian accidentally gave Sugar D the poison mist. 3.0 then hit Icarus with an assisted lung blower: 1…2…3!!!
This is one of the best Chikara matches of the year. The comedy was fantastic. The action was fantastic. The character work was fantastic. This match was not about MOVEZ, but this match was professional wrestling at its finest. Match Rating: ***3/4
Mr. Touchdown (w/ Veronica & Dasher Hatfield) vs. ACH [Young Lions Cup Tournament Final for the Young Lions Cup]
The previous night, Mr. Touchdown and ACH won the semi-finals matches. ACH defeated Jakob. Touchdown defeated Anthony Stone. I am beyond excited for this match. There hasn’t been a match in Chikara for the Young Lions Cup in a year.
ACH wanted a handshake, but Touchdown would have none of it. ACH really wants a handshake, and the crowd really wants the handshake. The crowd called Touchdown a nerd, and Touchdown was starting to lose his mind. ACH actually managed to get a handshake when Touchdown wasn’t paying attention. Touchdown was pissed off. They did some trading of holds. They played hot potato with the football. ACH got fed up, and Touchdown caught him with the Heisman Palm Strike. ACH then asked for Touchdown to go long for a pass. Touchdown got excited and ran throughout the very large building for the catch. Touchdown accidentally ran into a wall. Touchdown came back to ringside, and Dasher chewed him out for getting distracted. ACH tried to hit him with a slingshot plancha, but Touchdown caught him with a gutbuster. Touchdown got the heat after that. ACH came back with some chops. ACH then hit his running lariat in the corner and landed on the floor. ACH went for a diving cross-body, but Touchdown rolled through and hit a pair of backbreakers: 1…2…NO! ACH got a small package for a nearfall, but Touchdown came right back with a leg lariat to cut him off. Touchdown got caught up in the ropes, and ACH managed to hit a scissors kick. ACH set up for his Arabian Press Moonsault, but Touchdown caught him and drove him head first into the apron. Touchdown worked him over in the ring some more. ACH eventually came back with a diving hurricanrana, an enzuigiri from the floor and a slingshot Ace Crusher. ACH then hit his Arabian Press Moonsault. ACH even then checked on the woman he accidentally crashed against. Tecnico! They stayed on the floor for a bit, and Touchdown was able to send ACH into a wall. Touchdown tried for the countout win. ACH got back into the ring at 19. The crowd is going wild. Touchdown went for the football tackle, but ACH avoided it. ACH got a nearfall with a hurricanrana. Touchdown killed him with a HUGE back body drop. ACH caught him with a double stomp for a nearfall. ACH went for the Cram For The Exam, but Touchdown avoided it and hit his suplex/Ace Crusher: 1…2…NO! ACH came back with a knee strike, a Stunner, and a big running knee: 1…2…NO!!! ACH hit a middle rope 450 splash for a phantom pinfall, but Veronica had Bryce Remsburg distracted. ACH should have built that move up more, as the crowd had no idea what they just saw. Dasher sent Veronica away. Touchdown then hit his suplex Ace Crusher: 1…2…NO! ACH then hit his Cram For The Exam: 1…2…NO! Touchdown started berating ACH. ACH hit some strikes and a lariat to the back of the head. Touchdown caught him with a headbutt to the gut and a HUGE pop-up spinebuster: 1…NO! He kicked out at one! They traded slaps to the face and chops. More strikes! ACH hit a million kicks and then another Cram For the Exam: 1…2…NO! ACH set up for a charge into the corner, but Touchdown managed to send him into the turnbuckle. Touchdown went to the top rope, but ACH somehow hit a backflip kick! The phuck was that? ACH went for a super hurricanrana, but Touchdown somehow reversed it into a super spinebuster: 1…2…3!!!
One of the best, if not the best, Chikara matches of the year. ACH and Mr. Touchdown have been the two best “rookies” in independent wrestling this year, and they got to show off everything that they have right now in this match. Touchdown was on point with all of his mannerisms and character traits, and ACH proved to the perfect foil for him. Chikara best bring back ACH. In the meantime though, Mr. Touchdown is the perfect choice to restore some importance to the Young Lions Cup. Match Rating: ****1/4
ACH cut a promo after the show in the back. He says this one loss won’t hold him down, and that he will be back for the Young Lions Cup, which he believes, belongs to him. ACH vs. Mr. Touchdown II is now the Chikara match that I am most interested in.
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The 411: I don’t write about Chikara on 411mania that often, because Kevin Ford, the premiere Chikara writer in the world, posts all of his reviews to the site. Thus, there doesn’t seem much point to me providing a less informed analysis. Also, I’ve been pretty down on Chikara this year as the main angles (GEKIDO, Wink’s wacky teams) and the lack of interesting Grand Champion challengers, have actually taken away a lot of my enthusiasm for the product (although I have enjoyed several shows). However, the main event of this show was something that I was very interested in, and it really motivated me to break out my keyboard. And boy am I glad I did. This show was absolutely fantastic, and it may have even been better than Chikarasaurus Rex (the best Chikara show of the year by far at this point). Everything on the show made sense and/or was incredibly entertaining. Highest recommendation. Go to Smart Mark Video and get the show as a $15 DVD, a $11.99 MP4, or as a $9.99 Video on Demand. And remember to check out Kevin Ford's Chikara Special Blog and a Chikara Special Tumblr. Both are must reads for wrestling fans.
Also, check out a full/organized list of all the wrestling show reviews I've done at 411mania.