The Name on the Marquee: WWF Championship Wrestling (07.28.1984)
Posted by Adam Nedeff on 10.13.2013
Something happened at MSG this week, but screw it, here are some squash matches...
-Greetings from...Well, actually, I'm still at O'Hare in Chicago, where they've just announced a 90-minute delay for my flight. So...back to wrestling.
-Originally aired July 28, 1984.
-Your hosts are Vince McMahon and Tony Garea. What I like about seeing these two side-by-side is that Vince is wearing a well-cut tuxedo that fits him perfectly, and Tony is wearing a clearly-rented tux that is completely hanging off of him.
TITO SANTANA (Intercontinental Champion) vs RENE GOULET
-Rene stalls a good bit while putting on his glove. Goulet goes off the ropes but runs into a monkeyflip, and Tito grounds him with flying headscissors. Ominous glove shots help Goulet get free, but Tito gets right back to work with a side headlock. Goulet gets free and suplexes Tito for two. Goulet applies a claw. Tito mounts a comeback and throws a dropkick, but Goulet dodges it and drops an elbow for two. More elbows, another two-count.
-Goulet tries another claw. Tito slugs his way out of it and rams Rene into the turnbuckle. Backdrop by Tito, and the flying forearm connects for three. Crowd LOVED this match, and I can't say I blame them. Again, when you make your opponent look good, you'll look like an even bigger star for beating them.
ARM WRESTLING: IVAN PUTSKI vs JESSE “The Body” VENTURA
-From St. Louis. Putski's the face and Ventura's the heel. I'll leave it to you to fill in the blanks.
IRON SHEIK (with Ayatollah Blassie) vs RON HUTCHINSON
-”Iran sucks!” chant erupts. This is SUCH a great crowd. Every face is their hero, every heel is the most evil man walking the earth.
-Sheik taunts the crowd with poses while putting the boots to Hutchinson. “We want Slaughter!” is the next chant and Sheik is naturally offended. Belly-to-back suplex by the Sheik, and the came clutch gets the submission.
-Post-match, Sheik proclaims that Iran is #1 and demands “the fat sargeant.”
-This time around, a montage of squashes showcasing Big John Studd, Sgt. Slaughter, Pvt. Terry Daniels, and Paul Orndorff.
-Vince McMahon recaps the Cyndi Lauper-Captain Lou issue.
-Piper promises that his guest next week will be the winner of the match at MSG. And then quite suddenly, Piper pulls out a piece of mail, apologizing for the actions of Jimmy Snuka and saying that at night, he cries. Piper says the letter is from Snuka's son. Piper crumples the letter and spits on the floor.
-Now, if that reads like last week's Pit, you're right. Here's the WEIRD part...it's not the same segment. Piper's in a different empty studio this week. For whatever reason, they had him cut the same promo twice and then aired them on back-to-back weeks.
SUPERFLY JIMMY SNUKA vs TIGER CHUNG LEE
-Dueling martial arts poses to start. Tiger takes a shot to the throat and then hauls ass to the floor to avoid Snuka's wrath. Back in, they lock up and go into the ropes, but break cleanly. Garea notes that both men seem cautious toward each other. Lee finally shows some fire with chops. Snuka chops back.
-Lee is in control with more chops. Snuka starts to get pissed and Lee begs off. Snuka sends him into te ropes but gets shoulderblocked. Another whip into the ropes goes better for Snuka and he connects with another chop. And then Lee chops him. Slam by Lee and he goes to the top rope. Snuka slams him off and connects with a diving headbutt, but that's not quite enough. Snuka comes off the top rope with another diving headbutt for three. Good, but needed more chops.
The 411: Another one of those "holding pattern" nights. I mean, they pre-taped the show before doing a BIG angle live on MTV, so their hands were tied and you can't really blame 'em, but you're missing nothing here.