411’s WWF Sunday Night Heat Report 08.26.01

Hello and welcome to your WWF Sunday Night Heat recap, but not yet. First we have a couple of non-wrestling and partially related to wrestling things. Fantasy Football news: I picked up Terry Allen, hopefully he’ll produce. That’s about it, I’m just waiting for the season to start now. If anybody wants to invite me, I’ve got a Sandbox team without a home. I promise not to beat you… too badly. Soccer update: The U de Proc won it’s first game of the ITESM Intramuros Tercera Fuerza League with a score of 8-0. Nasty beating, just brutal. The game was followed by a nasty pull-apart brawl initiated by the sore losers, and ended by the superior U de Proc. Sadly, the team’s ‘‘crack’’ player, Gaspar Cantu was ejected, and will be suspended for one to three games. Special props to my man Fede, for going nuts rudo style and nailing one poor idiot with a flying front kick right to the ribs. Birthday greetings: Happy birthday to Jacobo ‘’El Proc’’ Barocio who turned…. a lot this Monday. Another Happy Birthday wish goes out to the beautiful Maru Santos, who turns 20 tomorrow. Ok well, that’s it. Let’s get this puppy rolling, because it’s time for…

WWF SUNDAY NIGHT HEAT live from WWF NY. Your hosts are Al Snow and Michael Cole, with special guests Commissioner William Regal and ‘‘The Japanese Buzzsaw’’ Yoshijiro Tajiri. The show opens with the arrival of the commish and Tajiri.

Match #1- Hugh Morrus vs. Albert

You know, I wonder what Albert could have done to be stripped of his royal position. They lock up, into a Morrus headlock, off the ropes, they collide, both men upright, not anymore after an Albert clothesline. Big kick to the face on Morrus, that gets two. .Another clothesline, he attempts another kick but misses and Morrus nails a powerslam for two. Irish whip to the corner, big splash. Belly to back suplex by the laughing man. It gets a two count. Irsih whip reversal, countered with a kick to the face by Morrus, Albert charges again, but gets hit with an elbow. Albert fakes a pig punch, which coaxes Morrus right into a baldobomb for the victory.

Winner- Albert

The Coach teases HHH later on in the show, and JVC presents a recap of Milk-a-mania running wild, from Raw.

We’re back and Regal catches Tajiri looking at Stacy Keibler’s pictures from this month’s WWF magazine. Apparently, you’ll go blind doing that. Don’t buy WWF magazine people, it causes blindness.

Match #2- The Holly Cousins vs Palumbo and O’Haire

Hardcore and Chuck start out. They trade punches and Palumbo gets the best of him. He works on the arm until Holly nails a clothesline. He follow up with a beatdown, and tags Crash in, cross body-block off the top, irish whip, reversed. O’haire interferes with a knee to the back, Crash goes for a rana, but gets powerbombed, the heels double-team and nail a huge double team hiptoss. The pin is broken up by Hardcore. O’haire holds Crash for a Palumbo kick, and he follows up with a vertical suplex. Now Palumbo holds crash for the O’Haire kick, chinlock by Sean. Great tag team wrestling by the heels, they’ve cut the ring in half and are tagging in and out. Hardcore breaks up another pin. Suplex by O’Haire leads to more double teaming. Irish whip to the corner, Holly up in the corner and nails a tornado ddt. Hot tag by Crash and Hardcore dominates both heels. Super nutshot on Palumbo, best dropkick in the business on O’Haire. He goes for a pin but it’s broken up. Rana off the top by Crash on O’Haire. Jungle kick attempt by Palumbo, but it nails his own partner. He follows up with hotshot and a clothesline but crash kicks out. Hardcore is occupied on the outside while O’Haire nalis Crash from behind and Palumbo rolls him up for three.

We get a replay of Booker T’s beating of Tajiri. Regal and Tajiri are on the set now, and they help out on commentary.

Match #3- Chavo Guerrero Jr. vs. Spike Dudley w/Molly Holly

Chavo nails some chops on Spike, but Spike gets the advantage with an armdrag and a rana, He goes for another one but Chavo nails a hotshot. Belly to back, and Chavo taunts. He kicks the ribs and hits a backbreaker. Guerrero continues to dominate with brawling moves and some chops. Tajiri puts on a Statue of Liberty foam hat. Spike gets the momentum with a headscissors to the outside and follows with a double foot-stomp, back in, and Guerrero hits a clothesline, he drops the elbow and picks him up. To the corner, kick to the ribs, and hangs him on the ropes, springboard legdrop gets two and a half. Belly to back suplex reversed with a back flip. Acid Drop!

Winner of the match- Spike Dudley

When we come back from commercials Al Snow’s truck is getting a ticket from an NYPD cop.

Match #4- Lance Storm vs. Scotty 2 Hotty

They start out brawling outside and Scotty goes back in with a flip, headscissors and dropkick get two for Scotty, irish whip to the corner. Slingshot into the turnbuckle by Scotty. Lance beats him down in the corner and nails a dropkick. Irish whip reversed with a kick and Scotty scores with a missile dropkick. Punches set up a big back body drop which in turn sets up the bulldog. W-O-R-M uh uh uh, chop, but Storm rolls out, back in Scotty goes up top, super sunset flip, rolled through by Storm, into the Mapleleaf!

Winner- Lance Storm

We get a recap of WWF Excess. HHH is looking pretty good. Trish is looking better. Hunter does not care about who he faces when he comes back, all he wants is the WWF title. He won’t come back unless he is at 100%. When asked about wether he’ll ever be back in perfect shape, HHH takes off his shirt and does his water spitting schtick. Backstage, Regal is reading about Queen Elizabeth and drinking tea. He reaches for a cookie but Tajiri rushes in and bats it away. Apparently, he though it was one of Debra’s cookies.

Interview time. Regal gets his motives for making the Smackdown Austin vs. Jericho title match questioned. He answers by saying that it was his way of punishing Austin for screwing Angle out of the title. The Rock’s name comes up which cues a ‘’Rocky’’ chant. Tajiri does his Rock imitation. Regal: ‘’Is this any way for a grown man to make a living?’’. Regal is glad The Rock has control of the WCW title, and is looking forward to what is coming.

Recap of WWF Raw is War. Austin appreciation night is broken up by Kurt Angle and his milk. I didn’t think much or Raw, but Austin’s face during this segment is priceless. That’s it for me. Check in on Thursday for my Lucha Libre recap, if I can get my vcr to work this time. Also, a new Joshua Grut column is up right now. It’s great, as usual. It does not say so, but keep in mind it’s part one of a two-parter.

See you next week.