411’s WCW Tuesday Nitro Report 12.12.00

WCW Tuesday Nitro Report 12.12.00
Taped in Shreveport LA
Announcers are Tony, Scott and BIG Stevie Ray
Report by Wids

We start out watching some cooking show. We all know what’s coming… KABONG! You missed one ingredient, you bayou slapnutz.

Clips of last week.

Luger makes a deal with Sanders.

Nitro open

Here comes Flair. Runs down Steiner. Sid and Steiner are here, but they can’t fight tonight or they are fired or something. Out comes Sanders. They go back and forth nicely. Sanders makes a match for tonight: Insiders vs. J&O vs. TPE. Flair makes Sid vs. Sanders.

Commercial Break

Scott Steiner arrives… sees Lash’s horrible sideburns and tries to shave them off with his fists.

Gene interviews Goddammit It’s Sid. He says something in Sid language that most of us cant understand.

Jindrack and O’Haire have some wires.

SARGE arrives, Disco mocks him, SARGE attacks Disco

Can I Be Serious For A Minute and Major Trash vs. Cat and Miss Jones
Storm on the mic, now Cat on the mic. Losing team has to sing the other’s national anthem on Thunder. What a stip! Chicks start out, Storm distracts Jones and Gunns with a dropkick! Chicks go at it, here comes the guys, and Cat is in control. Tons of wacky Cat antics. Tony mentions the “relaxed DQ rules” we haven’t heard about in many months. Feliner by Cat, Storm’s leg on the ropes. Oh, Gunns put it on the ropes. “Yack fight” on the floor. Ref distracted by chicks, Skipper is in, Cat fights him off, Duggan tosses in 2X4, Cat gets it, hits Storm and Cat covers.
Winner: Cat and Jones
Ref distracted by chicks, Skipper is in, Cat fights him off, Duggan tosses in 2X4, Cat gets it, hits Storm and Cat covers.
Winner: Cat and Jones

Goldberg has arrived!!!!!!!!!

Commercial Break

Jimmy Hart DJ horribleness.

Lash on the cell, presumably with Chavo. Rection walks in and yells a lot.

Sanders backstage in his office with the other NBT, they are not worried. Sanders hired Kronic for the Sid match. Reno is upset about the hiring of Kronic. Sanders says Kronic is all about business.

Crowbar and Daffney are at the announce position. Crowbar doesn’t know why he is out here.

Norman Smiley is out, he is going to once again conquer the hardcore division. Open challenge.

Norman Smiley vs. The MONSTER Meng w/Paisley and gold pants but no gold spike
Brawling in the ring. To the floor and into the aisle. Norman with some offense. They are near the DJ Ran position. Up in the house! Norman has Santa’s bag and hits Meng. What’s in that bag? Tony: it could be trucks made of STEEEEEEL! Brawling back to the ring. Santa in the ring, throws powder at both Meng and Smiley. Meng is blinded then hits the Tongan Death Grip on Paisley, Kwee Wee is here to top them. Santa is revealed to be…. TERRY FUNK! Funk takes out Meng with a chair. I guess this is a no contest. Funk on the mic, says he is the REAL Santa. Takes out Kwee Wee with a chair, then says “ho ho ho.” Funk is going to give this crowd 11 hos. Then says “ho” 11 times. Addresses Crowbar at the announce position, and challenges Crowbar for the Hardcore Title at Starrcade. Crowbar into the ring, accepts, then Funk lays him out.

Commercial Break

Sanders upset in his office, SARGE comes in yelling bloody murder.

Harris Boyz walk into some room which has 2 giant subs. They just start eating them, and Kidman and Konnan laugh at them on the monitor.

Gene interviews Steiner and Midajah. What about Flair? He doesn’t care about Flair, etc, etc.

Commercial Break

Pamela interviews MIA. Wall runs down Steiner as I laugh at his chances. Rection takes over the screaming about The Franchise and a War or something. Lash has franchise tonight.

Above Average Mike Sanders vs. Goddammit It’s Sid
Sanders on the mic. He has a paper of some sort. Sanders says he’s not cleared to wrestle, Sid ignores him and attacks. Powerbomb. Does the hand to the ear. Chokeslam. Powerbomb.
Winner: Sid

Oh no, Sid has a mic! Quotes Stevie Ray about something I cant understand.

DDP and Nash walk!

Commercial Break

Sid yells about keys to his car backstage.

Maria and Reno are walking near Kronic, he attacks them from behind, but they take control and beat him down. The other NBT are here to break it up. Vito appears too and checks on Reno. Vito and Reno hug, mysteriously back together as brothers.

Insiders vs. Jindrack & O’Haire vs. Perfect Event
Nash in with Chuck and O’Haire, they double team Nash. Finally Nash with a double clothesline, and he wants to tag and does. Here comes Page. Takes out both Shawn and Jindrack who were tagged in. Covers J for 2. Low blow by Shawn, DDT by J. Double team ensues. DDP drops down off a sleeper, “jawbreaker” and all 3 are down. DDP tries a tag, and gets it, Nash clears house. Big boot to Chuck. Powerbomb on Chuck. Jindrack flies at Nash, O’Haire with a Seanton! DDP climbs back into the ring, Diamond Cutter on Jindrack. Shawn whacks DDP with the belt as Chuck distracts. Chuck covers Nash.
Winners: Perfect Event

Commercial Break

NBT continued to beat on Nash over the break.

Sid has some van outside.

Nash and DDP ail backstage.

SARGE vs. Goldberg
Luger apparently made this match with Sanders. Goldberg didn’t know his opponent, and now sees Sarge in the ring. They talk in the ring. Goldberg says he ain’t gonna do it. Sarge insists. Luger out on the mic. Goldberg goes to leave, Luger said he’ll be counted out and retired. Sarge attacks. Goldberg isn’t fighting back. Finally he does. Spear. Tony: COME ON, WHERE’S THE JACKHAMMER? Goldberg waits, then does it.
Winner: Goldberg

Goldberg carries Sarge out of the ring.

Commercial Break

Meng, Daffney, Crowbar and Kwee Wee sit backstage. Jamie Knoble comes over and complains about Evan. Wait, here’s Evan, he gets this group to come with him.

The Franchise vs. 2 L-Shaped Sideburns
Shane on the mic, laments the absence of Torrie, and runs down MIA. Lash in control to begin. Snap suplex. Shane takes a breather on the floor, lash flies at him. Brawling to the announce position. Back into the ring, Shane takes control, but Lash does some splits to avoid clotheslines. Double clothesline. Chavo gives Lash a chair, Shane puts on the chain. Lash arguing with Chavo, Shane charges Lash, Lash uses the chair to the gut.
Winner by DQ: Shane

After the match, Shane takes out Lash with a chained fist. Rection makes the save. Rection argues face to face with Chavo.

Commercial Break

Chosen One comes in and gives the Harris Boyz a bag of sandwiches. But we already had sandwiches!

Sid is outside in a van looking crazy.

Pamela interviews Mike Awesome about the match with Bigelow at Starrcade. It will be an ambulance match.

Gene interviews JJ and the Harrises. They are sick. Jurassic Slapass. They have the Animals tonight and at Starrcade. Harrises walk out sick.

Commercial Break

Elimination Match
Jacked Up Termites w/Tygress vs. Chosen One and Harris Boyz
Harris Boyz are sick, you see. One of them runs to the back. And now the other. JJ attacks Konnan from behind to start. Konnan takes control. JJ all alone. Kidman and Rey are in too, and it’s a beating on Jarrett. Somehow JJ pins Konnan. JJ beats down Rey as Konnan returns to the back. Rey with a legdrop for 2. JJ with a long vertical suplex. JJ tries a powerbomb, Rey punches him, tags Kidman, powerbomb hits, missile dropkick by Kidman. Kidman with a big splash and JJ kicks out. JJ slumped in the corner, Kidman dropkicks the crotch, and broncobuster. Rey sent to the floor, ref tends to him. JJ kabongs Kidman, but Rey is back in and rolls up JJ.
Winners: Animals

Commercial Break

Recap of NBT and Nash/DDP feud. And more matches on the Starrcade card.

World Title
Big Poppa Pump (c) w/Midajah vs. Sgt A Worst
Steiner on the mic, runs down Flair, mentions Sting and Booker T to keep them fresh in our minds. Wall gets a bit of offense in the early going. Steiner rebounds and goes to work. Biceps kiss elbow drop, pushups. Steiner tosses Wall to the floor. Brawling. Wall knocks down Steiner. Wall gets a table. Steiner puts Wall through the table with a T Bone, and then Recliner.
Winner and STILL champ: Steiner

Sid on Turnertron, yells at Steiner. Tells Steiner to come outside for a fight. Steiner goes with a STEEEEL pipe. A ref follows. Steiner and Sid brawl near cars with other scrubby WCW guys cheering them on.