The Name on the Marquee: WWF Championship Wrestling (7.20.1985)
Posted by Adam Nedeff on 06.30.2014
The Killer Bees in action...
-Originally aired July 20, 1985.
-Your hosts are Vince McMahon and Bruno Sammartino.
KILLER BEES vs. STEVE LOMBARDI & RON SHAW
-Bees have entrance music in this early appearance but I’ll be damned if I can identify it. Howard Finkel sneaks in to mention that wrestling is returning to Lowell Auditorium with action featuring top stars like Salvatore Bellomo, Ricky Steamboat, George Steele, and Junkyard Dog. Uh, I think you may have read those names in the wrong order.
-Elbow and a slam by Blair to daze Lombardi. Powerslam and it already looks like Blair could finish, but instead he tags in Brunzell for a double backdrop. Vince notes how surprised he is that the Killer Bees are doing well in the WWF, considering that they don’t have a manager.
-Blair works Shaw’s arm while speak-of-the-devil Classy Freddy Blassie shows up at the commentary table. As of the latest tabulations, he is in the lead in the Manager of the Year contest. Vince mentions that most of the votes so far have been written in Russian and Arabic, and Freddy thanks the Iranian and Russian embassies for the help they’ve provided in driving up votes.
-They’re getting really elaborate with the Updates now, doing the wide shot of the entire set to demonstrate that they, in fact, have a set that’s wide enough to do that with. Lord Alfred Hayes commends Tito Santana for his dedication to training and rehabilitating his injured leg. The hard work has paid off; Tito is once again Intercontinental Champion.
-The new issue of WWF Magazine is on sale. In this issue: Andre the Giant meets the Goonies! Captain Lou Albano clowns around with Joe Piscopo! The WWF is being turned into a cartoon! And Bobby Heenan meets a live weasel! Buy the WWF now, at newsstands or at Waldenbooks. Jesus, I actually went on Ebay and did a search after watching this ad.
ADRIAN ADONIS (with Bobby Heenan) vs. GARY STARR
-Adonis’ first TV match in about five months, and he now has Bobby Heenan in his corner. Vince & Bruno both note how incredibly tough Adonis looks, wearing a spiked choker, studded gloves, and a leather jacket. Adrian has a briefcase handcuffed to him. Vince & Bruno suspect it’s Heenan’s $25,000 bounty, but the briefcase has the cryptic message “Relax with Trudi” painted on it.
-Slam and an elbow by Adonis as the crowd chants “Orndorff.” A whole bunch of elbows by Adonis while Heenan excitedly pats the briefcase. Adonis’ finisher is a Dutch rub that causes his opponent to pass out, and Vince explains that the name of the move is “The Big Apple.” Oh my god, what a forgotten treasure for The Big List of Shit Finishers.
-Freddie Miller talks to Don Muraco about his next bout in Boston Garden. He celebrates his giant victory in the King of the Ring tournament and says he should start calling himself The Eliminator after he eliminated all of the wrestlers in that tournament. He’s looking forward to teaming up with Mr. Fuji to face Ricky Steamboat and the Junkyard Dog.
UNCLE ELMER (with Hillbilly Jim) vs. DOC BUTLER
-Vince is surprised at how few votes Hillbilly Jim has received so far for Manager of the Year and emphasizes that Jim is eligible for the contest.
-Butler starts with a dropkick and Elmer shakes his ass to celebrate how little it hurt. Vince slips up and calls Elmer “Plowboy” as Elmer drops the big leg on Butler and gets the three-count instantly.
-Freddie Miller talks to Ricky Steamboat, who says he knew as soon as he got the win on TV that Muraco & Fuji would want another piece of him. He eagerly proclaims that for his upcoming tag team match, he found the worst dog he could. Ahem. And he and JYD are ready for action.
TERRY FUNK vs. JOSE LUIS RIVERA
-Funk threatens the substitute ring attendant this week and reminds him not to wear the hat. Actually…I think that’s Kevin Dunn they have working as a ring attendant this week.
-Rivera gets off to a good start with a backdrop that sends Funk “five feet in the air,” which would make Rivera about three feet tall. Funk retaliates by throwing Rivera out of the ring, and Rivera lands with an audible “clang” on the barricade. Back in a HORRIBLE whiff on a leapfrog; Funk goes headfirst into Rivera’s balls and then staggers and collapses on the ropes, and Rivera gets right up and clearly apologizes to Funk during the next spot. Sleeper gets the win for Funk.
-Captain Lou strolls out with the Tag Team Title belts, celebrating his 15th championship combination. Piper calls Albano the biggest pig he’s ever met. A brawl nearly erupts between Albano and Piper, and Windham & Rotundo come out for a standoff. Windham & Rotundo challenge Piper & Orton to a match and even offer to put the belt up for grabs. Now that I’ve seen them tease and build to it, I can’t help wondering why it didn’t happen.
STEEL CAGE MATCH, INTERCONTINENTAL TITLE: GREG “The Hammer” VALENTINE (Champion, with Jimmy Hart) vs. TITO SANTANA
-Joined in progress from Baltimore. They brawl near the door. Tito gets Valentine away from the door and hits him hard enough that Valentine bangs his head on the cage and goes down. But Tito is so hurt that he can’t capitalize.
Both men are disoriented and Tito climbs the wall right next to the door, not realizing that the door is there. Valentine realizes it and opens the door of the cage, but Santana kicks it shut right in Valentine’s face, knocking The Hammer into the ring and reaching the floor first. Valentine, in a fit of rage, destroys the title belt.
-Hillbilly Jim reminds you not to leave your dog in a hot car.
RICKY “The Dragon” STEAMBOAT vs. MAGNIFICENT MURACO (with Mr. Fuji)
-Oh, wow, this is the first match for the “Dragon” name? Huh.
-Muraco dashes to the ring and attacks Steamboat from behind before Steamboat has a chance to take off his gi and his belt. They trade chops and Steamboat wins the shit out of that battle. Muraco catches him coming off the ropes with a slam, but misses every attempted elbow drop following that. They trade more chops. Fuji comes onto the apron and Steamboat elbows him right off. Fuji grabs Steamboat’s black belt and gets in the ring. He chokes Steamboat, ending the match with a disqualification. They tie Steamboat to the top rope with the belt and then let him drop to the floor, hanging him, and they whip away at Steamboat until Tito Santana and the Junkyard Dog come to the ring to make the save.
-Freddie Miller talks to Paul Orndorff, who has a tape of everything that’s gone down between he and Piper, from “Rasslemania” to “Saturday Night Live” and says that whether the fans like him or not, they’re all behind him.
The 411: A feud blow-off and some tremendous storylines taking shape this week. Another good show in a series of them.