Dark Pegasus Video Review: Unforgiven 1999

Unforgiven 1999 by J.D. Dunn Mail & General Comments: Re: My own Scott Keith-like section where everything is easy to find. That’s something you’d have to take up with Ashish, although he’s pretty busy and will probably yell at you for bothering him. Take it up with Larry instead, who is also busy and will probably yell at you, but at least he’ll put it in a column for all to see. In the meantime, if you click on my name under my logos, you can get a list of my video reviews – 523 so far, and over 1200 including TV and PPV reviews. 😮 Onward: In the interim between Summerslam and this show, Triple H won the title from Mankind but then lost it to Vince McMahon himself. McMahon, then a babyface, said he wouldn’t go back on the stipulation to stay off WWF TV, so it will now be on the line tonight in a “Six-Pack Challenge.” I’ll give you three guesses which WWF superstar booked that match… and the first two don’t count. Also, the referees got tired of getting beat up all the time and went on strike. Okay, that’s actually a clever inside joke from Russo, who was always one to over-utilize the ref bump. Therefore, scab referees are being used tonight. September 26, 1999 Liver from Charlotte, N.C.. Your hosts are Jim Ross and Jerry Lawler. Opening Match: Val Venis vs. Steve Blackman. Val’s pre-match double entendre is pretty good. He says there must be remnants of the hurricane left in North Carolina because he got blown from one end of the state to the other. There was actually an issue here as Val’s vibrator somehow wound up in Blackman’s martial arts bag. Steve Lombardi (The Brooklyn Brawler) is your scab referee. Val gets crotched on the top rope, and Blackman takes over. He works the back a lot. A lot. A whole lot. The crowd is getting just too damn hyped, so Blackman applies a chinlock. Val suddenly comes back with a back elbow and hits the Kobashi knees. He stops to grind over Blackman, which by the Rick Rude Rule should be impossible with all the back work Blackman did. Blackman comes back with a spinebuster, but Val hits a bulldog and a DDT. That sets up the Money Shot at 6:33. This really belonged on Heat. 3/4* Val pulls out Blackman’s Kendo stick, but Blackman takes it away from him and nails him in the head. That brings out EMT Barbara Bush to give Val some TLC. Blackman gets in her face, so Chief of Security Jim Dotson spears him. I don’t believe anything ever came from this. The Big Show refuses to answer any questions about the Undertaker. There was a lot of speculation that Taker would jump to WCW, but it was just lengthy injury recover time. In the back, Mark Henry comes on to Lillian Garcia and gets slapped. And this is a woman who considered marrying Viscera. European Title: Mark Henry vs. D-Lo Brown. The story here is that Henry was a big fat piece of crap, and D-Lo wanted him to lose weight so he wouldn’t have a heart attack. I’ll leave it to you to figure out how successful D-Lo was. Actually, Henry looks significantly smaller here, but maybe it’s just the lack of Predator hair. Henry was so pissed off about having to lose weight that he turned on D-Lo and cost him the Intercontinental and European Titles. Jeff Jarrett was so grateful that he handed the European Title over to Henry. Henry tries to get out of the match by claiming Lillian’s slap gave him a “braineurism.” D-Lo storms the ring but gets tossed into the post. D-Lo flips over Henry and hits a Sky High, which is, understandably, not all that high. That gets two. Henry drops him on the top rope, but D-Lo knocks him to the floor and hits a freaking tope! Back in, D-Lo gets two off a crossbody. Henry hits the World’s Strongest Slam, but it was just a transition move at that point, so it doesn’t get the pin. D-Lo comes back with another crossbody. Henry slams him again and then reverse slams him off the top. Lawler jokes that Henry’s face is kind of gaunt. D-Lo makes another comeback with a rana. Henry avalanches him but climbs up to do the 10-punches, and D-Lo is able to counter to a powerbomb. That sets up the Lo Down at 9:11. Okay, watch this match and then think that D-Lo was jobbed out and released a few years later, while Henry gets repeatedly repackaged as a main eventer even to this day despite having no discernible mic skills, charisma or wrestling talent. This is exhibit A in the evidence for Wellness Testing of the talent relations people. *1/4 In the back, some jobbers and midcarders beat up Chaz for allegedly beating his girlfriend. Yeah, wouldn’t want to promote violence against women… …so elsewhere, Jeff Jarrett threatens to put Debra in her place and violently drags Miss Kitty off with him. Intercontinental Title: Jeff Jarrett (w/Miss Kitty) vs. Chyna. Chyna is somehow a face despite being quasi-aligned with Triple H and using his music. I guess that owes to the heel power of Jeff Jarrett, who started beating up women up and down the roster. I know Chyna gets knocked for being a lunatic starfucker, but she was actually pretty good in the ring at this point. Then again, I just watched a Mark Henry match, so maybe it’s just looking good by comparison. Jarrett misses his splash against the ropes but crotches Chyna on the post. Back in, Chyna works in a Flair Flip but gets superplexed off the top. She counters to a small package, though, á la Dynamite Kid. Mae Young and Moolah argue with Jeff from the crowd. Chyna drops Jarrett with an Electric Chair drop. He comes back with a sleeper, but she counters to a suplex. Powerslam by Chyna for two. A powerbomb gets two more. She tries a huracanrana, but Jarrett powerbombs her. He goes for the figure-four, but she shoves him to the floor. She backdrops him on the Spanish table and goes for the Pedigree. Jarrett reverses and slingshots her into referee Harvey Wippleman. Miss Kitty slides the guitar in, but Moolah and Mae Young jump in and beat the everloving shit out of him. They even double suplex him! He comes back with a double clothesline, which is one of the most dementedly funny things I (and Lawler) have ever seen. Lawler: They started wrestling when the Dead Sea was still sick! Debra storms out, shoves Kitty down, and hits Jarrett with the guitar. Chyna rolls into the cover and claims the IC Title at 12:45. Oh, but head scab official Tom Prichard zips out and reverses the decision for the interference by Moolah and Mae. This was a really fun match, and it’s a shame Jarrett couldn’t have jumped to a competent organization while he was still at his peak. Chyna takes out her frustrations on Prichard. *** The Dudley Boyz vs. The Acolytes. This is the Dudz PPV debut with the Fed. Remember when Bubba used to have a stutter? Remember when Bubba and D-Von used to be motivated?! Jim Korderas crossed the picket line to referee this match, which becomes a plot point later on. Bubba gets flapjacked, but he blocks a charge and hits a senton. Lawler is *still* laughing at Moolah and Mae Young. He actually questioned whether or not they’ve passed through menopause yet, so I hold him personally responsible for the pregnancy angle. The crowd goes apathetic, so thankfully Lawler brought plenty of old jokes with him. Moolah and Mae tried to interfere in the last match they went to – the Christians versus the lions. The Dudz hit a doubleteam neckbreaker. Bradshaw comes in and backdrop superplexes D-Von for two. The Dudleyz hit the 3D, but Bubba pops up into the Clothesline from Hell. Stevie Richards sneaks in and hits D-Von with a superkick to pledge allegiance to give the Acolytes the win at 7:30. Stevie was in the middle of his copycat gimmick where he tried to emulate any of the WWF superstars in order to be accepted. He’s dressed like an Acolyte here. Faarooq offers him a handshake and then destroys him with the clothesline. Neither team was over at this point, and they didn’t have good chemistry together either. *1/2 WWF Women’s Title: Ivory vs. Luna. They start in the back as Ivory attacks Luna from behind. The brawl goes to an office where Luna slams her into the copy machine and makes some copies. Ross actually works in the Rob Schneider reference, so I won’t bother. Ivory puts Luna’s head in the trash, but Luna comes back and slams her on some boxes. She splashes her off the Caterpillar for two. Tori does a run in and saves Luna from a pole shot. Ivory shoves her aside and uses it anyway for the win at 3:36. I can’t even remember the issue here. Something about Ivory burning Tori’s face, which would lead to Tori hooking up with Kane and then leaving him for X-Pac. 1/4* Moolah and Mae try to voice threats to Jeff Jarrett, but Ivory runs in and calls Moolah an old lady. She gets her ass handed to her for her trouble. WWF Tag Team Titles: The New Age Outlaws vs. Edge & Christian. The Outlaws reunified without explanation after months of feuding (don’t ask, it’s Russo). They won the titles from the Rock ‘n’ Sock Connection. E&C challenged them on Heat about an hour before this. Both teams are babyfaces, but E&C start playing heels after it’s obvious that the NAO are over. The usual R&R/Midnights formula follows with Roadie playing face-in-peril. Lawler is *still* on Mae and Moolah, needling Ross for not telling us where they played football. Roadie comes back with a crossbody on “Christopher” (I guess Jim Ross’ brain is on strike too). The Blonds cut off the tag, though. Roadie blocks their springboard maneuver and hits a double DDT. Billy gets the hot tag but takes a reverse DDT from Christian. The New Brood comes out and attacks E&C behind the ref’s back, though. Jeff Hardy hits Edge with the missile dropkick to set up the Fameasser at 11:09. **3/4 Lillian unsuccessfully tries to get an explanation from the British Bulldog on why he turned on the Rock to give Triple H the win. Hardcore Title, Kennel From Hell: The Big Bossman vs. Al Snow. I believe this is the only Kennel from Hell match in history. I also believe that there is a reason for that. The idea is basically the same as the Punjabi Prison match. The then-regular blue cage surrounds the ring, and then the Hell in a Cell surrounds that. In between, there are a bunch of hungry Rottweilers. To win, you have to escape both cages. Why Rottweilers, you ask. Well, Al Snow had a Chihuahua named Pepper (as a play on the Taco Bell commercials). The Bossman kidnapped the dog, skinned it, and fed it to an unsuspecting Al. Al tries to lock Bossman outside of the blue cage as the handlers bring down the dogs. Bossman climbs up the cage to escape the dogs. He and Al fight on top, and Al drops down in between the cages. The handlers hold back the dogs, which pretty much negates the purpose of having angry dogs in the first place. Snow runs away from them to the cell door, but instead of going out (which is supposed to be the point), he climbs up the cell so Bossman can yank him back into the cage. Bossman cuffs him and knocks him around for a bit. Bossman, ever the strategist, had the foresight to bring wire-cutters. He cuts a hole in the top of the cage, but Al Snow snaps his cuffs (say whaaaaat?) and crotches Bossman. He pulls Head out of a bag and nails Bossman with it. Bossman goes up the cage and literally sits there and waits for Al to kick his way out of the cage while hanging from the mesh. See, he didn’t want to get bit by the dogs. Not that there was really any danger of that since they were on the other side of the ring licking each others butts – much like the bookers of this match. Snow kicks through the door and escapes for the win at 11:41. I’d call this the worst match of the year, but it’s not even Bossman’s worst cell match of the year! 1/4* Chris Jericho (w/Curtis Hughes) vs. X-Pac. It was supposed to be Jericho beating Ken Shamrock, but Shamrock made a last-second decision to jump back to shoot-fighting. Kenny also had legit heat with Curtis Hughes for getting stiff with him during a beatdown. No matter because this is a much better match-up. They do a quick series of reversals, and Jericho avoids the Broncobuster. He makes X-Pac chase him around the ring and then kicks him on the way back in. X-Pac goes for the X-Factor, but Jericho counters it to a spinebuster. Pac tosses him to the floor and hits a springboard cannonball. Hughes nails X-Pac in full view of scab referee Tom Prichard. Prichard is too busy admiring his loud blue pants to disqualify Jericho, though. Back in, Jericho catches X-Pac with a tilt-o-whirl backbreaker. The fans get distracted by something, so Jericho kills the match dead with a chinlock until they start paying attention again. I’m guessing a female streaker, judging by the deep-voiced “boos” a few minutes later. The crowd finally starts dueling “Jericho sucks!” and “X-Pac sucks” chants. X-Pac fights out of it and hits a spinning kick. He hits Hughes with a dive for no discernible reason. Back in, Jericho blocks the Broncobuster with a boot to the nuts and hits a Butterfly Backbreaker. It only gets two, so Jericho gets frustrated and goes up top. X-Pac catches him with a superplex. He can’t capitalize immediately but puts Jericho into the tree-of-woe and finally hits the Broncobuster. Hughes has seen enough and decks Tom Prichard for the DQ at 13:04. This was a very WCW-ish match (in a good way) until the stupid finish. Jericho dropped about 25-percent of his moveset as he moved up the card. ***1/2 Vacant WWF Title, Six-Pack Challenge: Triple H vs. Mankind vs. The Rock vs. The British Bulldog vs. The Big Show vs. Kane. Steve Austin is your special guest enforcer, but he doubles as guest commentator. Two guys are allowed in at once, and you have to tag in. The Rock smacks the Bulldog (who is subbing for the Undertaker) around for a while and then does the same to Triple H. Kane tags himself in during the People’s Beatdown. Kane knocks Big Show off the apron, so Show shoves him off the top rope. Mankind tries his luck with Kane, but Big Show tags himself in and tries to snap Kane in half. Kane enzuigiris Show and then hits a dropkick(!). Bulldog tags in and vertical suplexes the Rock. Mankind refuses to tag in against his buddy, the Rock, so he tags right back out to Kane. Kane tries to chokeslam Mankind, but Mankind kicks him low. Hunter tags in and abuses Mankind until Rock goes out and chases him down. Mankind turns the tide and piledrives Hunter on the steps. Ouch! Kane and the Rock go at it on the other side. The Rock ‘n’ Sock team up to knock the Bulldog down over Austin’s objections (he wants Mick to have a killer instinct). Show and Kane trade blows as the striking referees strut down to the ring like some gay street gang. Look out! It’s the Zebras! Big Show hits a big back elbow on Mankind, but Rock makes the save. Rock fires off a few shots and knocks Show down with a clothesline. Rock gets knocked to the floor and steals Austin’s beer. Oooh. Back inside, Kane Tombstones Mankind, but Show makes the blind tag and signals for the chokeslam. Kane nails him with the flying clothesline, though, to break it up. The match breaks down with Hunter hitting the Pedigree on the Bulldog (they were supposed to be in cahoots). Mankind tosses Hunter and busts out the Sock on the Rock. Rock powers up and hits the Rock Bottom. Hunter saves the title, though. Show clears the ring and gives Mankind another chokeslam. ONE, TWO, THRE-NO! The striking refs pull out scab referee Jimmy Korderas and beat the hell out of him. Austin leaves the announce position and destroys the striking refs! AWESOME! That leaves Hunter and the Rock in the ring. Rock hits the People’s DDT as Austin returns to replace Korderas. ONE, TWO, THRE-NO! Rock Bottom and People’s Elbow, but Show and Mankind pull Austin out before he can count. Show tries to chokeslam Austin, but Austin kicks him low to counter. The Bulldog sneaks in and nails Rock with a chairshot. He’s about to hit Hunter too, but Austin takes the chair away from him and smashes Bulldog’s brains in. That allows Hunter to hit a Pedigree to reclaim the title at 20:30. Wild match with a number of different story threads intersecting at once. It probably would have been the WWF Match of the Year had it not been topped the following month. ****1/4

The 411: The WWF hit a big hot streak around this time with Fully Loaded, Summerslam and Unforgiven all being highly entertaining shows. This was also very much a transition show from the Outlaws and Acolytes to the Hardyz, Dudleyz, and E&C as well as from Austin and Taker to Rock, Triple H and Jericho. The wild, all-over-the-building brawls began to get phased out with more of an emphasis on wrestling. This was also the last U.S. PPV booked by Vince Russo before he bolted to WCW. Solid thumbs up both as a wrestling show and for historical reasons.

Final Score:  8.0   [ Very Good ]