Dark Pegasus Video Review: Full Impact Pro — Cage of Pain II

Posted by J.D. Dunn on 05.30.2008

The YRR get their pretty faces messed up by the Black Market and Heartbreaker Express.

Full Impact Pro — Cage of Pain II
by J.D. Dunn

This is a show I've been anticipating for a while, given the buzz surrounding it. The new ROH-ish lighting scheme debuts here, thus instantly making for more watchable DVDs.

I'm begging them to do something about the sound system, though. Inside the armory, it probably sounds fine, but on the DVDs I can hear individual fans but not who ever is speaking on the mic.

September 29, 2007

From Crystal River, Fla.

Your hosts are Dave Prazak and Lenny Leonard.

Opening Match, Triple Threat: "Cool" Seth Delay vs. Scott Commodity vs. Jake Crist (w/Dave Crist).
Delay hangs back as Commodity and Crist do a short sequence. Commodity gets armdragged and wristlocked, so he goes to the ropes and calls out Delay. Delay, no dummy, armdrags him and grabs a wristlock. Commodity goes up but gets knocked to the floor. He lets Delay clothesline Crist over the top and then jumps Delay from behind. He uppercuts Delay and goes for a splash, but there's no water in the pool. Prazak works in the "metal plate in the forearm" complaint about Delay. Crist comes back in with a crossbody on both guys and superkicks Commodity. Commodity is in the ropes, though. Crist goes up but gets yanked off by Delay in an awkward move. Delay finishes with the 450-senton at 7:11. Sloppy in points, but Commodity is interesting and should probably join the YRR any day now. **

FIP Champion Roderick Strong calls out Larry Sweeney, but Dave Prazak answers the call and challenges Strong on behalf of Sweeney. Prazak shoves Milo Beasley out of his chair into Strong's way, so Strong Rock Bottoms Beasley onto his chair in a sickening move. Sweeney blindsides Strong and delivers a beatdown.

The Minnesota Home Wrecking Crew vs. Daizee Haze & Sara Del Rey.
Isn't Daizee Haze just the cutest? Haze is upset because Rain interfered in her match the night before. She and Del Rey (The Hazy Angels?) attack and deliver double sledges. They isolate Rain early, and Del Rey knees her in the face. Leonard questions why there haven't been any women in DP Associates, but Prazak blows him off. Rain backs Haze to the heel corner, and they work her over. Lacey blocks a bodyscissors, and the MHWC hit a wheelbarrow facebuster. Daizee backflips out of a double suplex and hits a double Daizee Cutter. HOT TAG TO DEL REY! Sara avalanches Rain, blocks Lacey's spin kick, and gives Lacey a cradle backdrop. Del Rey tosses Daizee onto Rain and splashes Lacey all in one motion. The ref makes Del Rey get out, though. Daizee hits the Heart Punch and the Yakuza Kick to get a little revenge at 9:15. Good formula. Nothing too exciting. **1/4

Jay Briscoe vs. Gran Akuma.
Jay is one half of the FIP tag champs at this point, along with his brother Mark. Akuma is the guy who looks like a tiny version of the Commish and kicks like a son of a bitch. They take it to the mat early, though, until Jay gets bored with that and hits a huracanrana. Akuma drops Jay on his head with a German Suplex and hits a sad Code Red. Well, he got it eventually – with a lot of obvious help from Jay – I guess that's the important thing. Briscoe comes back with a sitout facebuster and a DVD for two. Jay goes up, but Akuma catches him and hits the Spider Belly-to-Belly Superplex. That sets up a moonsault from Akuma. ONE, TWO, THRE-NO! Akuma blocks the Jaydriller and rolls Jay up for one. Jay finishes with the Jaydriller at 9:45. Akuma's okay, but this made me want to see a Jay singles run. I think his brother is occasionally a bad influence on him, but when left to his own devices, Jay is pretty good. **1/4

FIP Florida Heritage Title, Falls Count Anywhere: Erick Stevens vs. Necro Butcher (w/DP Associates)
From what I can gather from Stevens' prematch promo, he says he didn't have an opponent for tonight, so he issues an open challenge. Necro Butcher and DP Associates attack him from behind, which would be fine, but they already had Prazak leave in the middle of the last match to "get ready for the next match." They brawl through the crowd, tossing chairs at one another. They trade chops and brawl to the concession stand. The brawl spills to the interview area where Necro chair-slams Stevens on the floor. To the ring, Stevens reverses a whip, sending Necro into the post. He catches him with a powerslam on the rebound. Finally, they make it to the ring where Stevens suplexes Necro onto a pile of chairs. Necro misses a chair swing and gets lariated. ONE, TWO, THR-NO! Pump-handle powerbomb! ONE, TWO-NO! Stevens puts Necro in a chair and goes up, but Necro jumps up and gives him a right cross. Necro ranas Stevens on a pile of chairs. Crazy. Necro seems to have cut his thumb partially off. ONE, TWO, TH-NO! He gives Stevens an Airplane DVD (no, not the one with Leslie Nielson). ONE, TWO, THR-NO! Stevens comes back with a Waterwheel Slam through some chairs. ONE, TWO, THR-NO! Necro fights back and backbreakers Stevens on the edge of a chair. Prazak tries to interfere with a chair, but it backfires, and Necro runs into Prazak. Stevens rolls Necro up and gets the pin at 15:27. Kind of an odd finish, considering there were so many harsh maneuvers that didn't get the pin. The brawl was crazy, though, and it let both guys do what they do best. Stevens is an offensive powderkeg; Necro takes a beating. This really let Stevens break out as a guy who has a lot of firepower. ***1/4

Dragon Gate Rules: Jack Evans, BxB Hulk & Yamato vs. Delirious, Hallowicked & Jigsaw.
IT'S INCOHERISAW! They do the lucha "pair off a do a brief sequence" thing. It's highlighted by Hallowicked getting an assist from Jigsaw to breakdance and also by this exchange between Prazak and Leonard – Prazak: What do you think of Hallowicked's stem (on his mask)? Leonard: Eh. I've seen bigger. All six guys get in the ring and do the world's longest Caterpillar Crab. Finally, everything goes traditional as Jigsaw plays face-in-peril. Prazak and Leonard start talking about Japanese wrestlers who came through FIP at one time or another, then they bust on the people of Crystal River for having mullets. What's funny is that Crystal River is their most faithful town in terms of reaction and attendance. Jigsaw comes back with an enzuigiri on Evans (they'd join forces in ROH as the Vulture Squad). Delirious gets the hot tag and cleans house. He headbutts Jack in mid-crossbody. Hallowicked hits Yamato with a tope. Back in, BB Hulk hits a running shooting star press. Jiggy, Hallowicked and Delirious isolate Yamato and blitz him with doubleteams. That leads to Shadows Over Hell. ONE, TWO, THRE-NO! Yamato kicks out and gives Delirious an Inverted Falcon Arrow. Jack Evans returns, and he and Hulk hit Hallowicked with a 630-legdrop Decapitation at 18:21. Crazy finisher. The match was a lot of high-octane moves with a little comedy thrown in here and there – like a lot of CHIKARA and Dragon Gate. ***1/4

FIP World Heavyweight Title: Roderick Strong vs. Larry Sweeney (w/DP Associates).
Sweeney's Texarkana Television Title is not on the line (because this is not TV; it's a DVD release). Sweeney joined DP Associates at the Third-Year Anniversary Show. Sweeney stalls forever, prompting Strong to call him a chicken – and the fans eat it up! Hey, give me 400-500 rednecks with mullets booing the heels over 2,000 Manhattan Center smartasses any day. Strong uses his "freaky retard strength" (tm CM Punk) to crush Sweeney's hand off the handshake. Sweeney uses some well-placed elbows between the eyes to take over. He chokes Strong out on the ropes and catapults him into the bottom rope. Sweeney slingshots himself into a headbutt and then hits the Garvin Stomp. Strong catches Sweeney coming off the top and punches him in the gut. DIBIASE SELL~! Strong chops his way back but gets cut off with a Gourdbuster. Sweeney's arrogant cover only gets two. Strong comes back with a suplex, but Sweeney O'Connor Rolls him and gets two (with a handful of tights). They fight over a small package, and Sweeney gets two more. Sweeney hits El Paso Del Muerte for two. Strong comes back with the Gibson Driver into the Stronghold for the submission at 17:10. Sweeney's old school 80's heel shtick works well with Roderick's babyface act. At times, he evokes Rick Martel, Ted Dibiase, and Rick Rude. Strong just kind of did his thing, and that was enough to put on a fine match. ***1/4

Cage of Pain II: The Black Market & The Heartbreak Express vs. The YRR (w/Lacey & Rain).
Sal Rinauro talks about seeing Wargames in the Omni as a young kid, and he made a promise never to be in a match like that during his career. Now, he's had to break that promise, so he's going to make the Black Market & Heartbreak Express pay for it. Surprisingly good heel promo from Rinauro. The idea here is that it's a Wargames only with lots of plunder hung around the ring, and you can win by pinfall. Machete and Rinauro start, and that goes badly for Rinauro. He gets launched into the cage face first. Kenny King comes in as the YRR win the coin toss (duh). Machete still fares well, smashing light tubes over their backs. The YRR finally overwhelm him and work him over until Sean Davis comes in to even things up. He smashes a trash can lid over their heads. He tries to run them into the cage, but King and Rinauro put on the breaks and toss him into the cage. Jason Blade is up next. He pummels Machete but gets smashed with a light tube. Blood count: Machete, Rinauro, and Sean. Phil Davis joins the match but is immediately intercepted by the YRR. He sprays a fire extinguisher in their faces to come back. Great visual as Sal gets a chair smashed on his back and he screams into the camera. Chasyn Rance is the final member of the YRR – and the announcers imply that he's a pussy so this isn't his match. They work in a spot where King dropkicks a chair into Sean's face. Shawn Murphy completes the match and starts destroying people left and right. Jason Blade gets tossed into a light tube. Murphy javelins King into the cage. The YRR finally catch up with him and spike piledriver him on a chair. The YRR try to escape the cage, but the faces smash light tubes over them. The HBX toss Rinauro through the door and out to the floor. King superkicks Davis as Phil and Blade brawl on the top. Blade gets knocked off the top and falls through a table. The Black Market put some light tubes on a table and then slam King through everything. That's enough for the pin at 20:07. I've never really been into either the Black Market or the Heartbreak Express. This was pretty good, though, because the YRR have always been portrayed as rich douchebags in need of a comeuppance, and when they were faced with four brawlers, they certainly got it. ***3/4

Suddenly, the lights go out, and the Heartbreak Express set off fireballs in the faces of the Black Market. Oh, that is SOOOOOO Smoky Mountain. The ring fills with debris (what can make it in over the cage) as Sean tells Florida to kiss their asses. The babyfaces come out of the locker room to tend to the Black Market as Sean berates the fans on his way out.

In the back, Sal's back is a mess, so Chasyn tells him that they can go take a bubble bath.

The 411: I've heard this called the best show in FIP history. I'm not as versed in Full Impact Pro as I should be, but this seems like a fine indy show nonetheless. I like Redefined a little better because it did have a MOTYC in Stevens vs. Strong. This was just a top-to-bottom solid card. How much you like the main event will depend on how much you buy into the Black Market/Heartbreak Express rivalry. It's really a love it or hate it type of thing.

Very much a thumbs up show, though.

Final Score:  8.0   [ Very Good ]