From the Bowery: Stone Cold Steve Austin - What?

Posted by Robert Leighty Jr. on 12.14.2008

3 Stages of Hell. What? Austin vs Steamboat. What? And that's about all.

Stone Cold Steve Austin: What?

-We open with a video montage and it shows what else, Stone Cold being a bad ass. It loses a little something when they start injecting “What” every few seconds.

-Austin tells us he doesn’t set long-term goals. He looks at things from PPV to PPV and only looks far ahead to WrestleMania. He discusses what it means to be in the Main Event of WrestleMania. That takes us to WM X-7.

-We now discuss the awesomeness of Rock/Austin at WM X-7. Austin calls it the best match he has ever had with the Rock. It’s hard to argue that point. I voted it the match of the year in 2001 on some Internet Wrestling Forum back in the day. We get a good video package for the match. The music they use isn’t the best, but I guess they didn’t want to spend cash on something more epic or fitting. As we all know the match ends with Vince helping Austin regain the title. Seemingly this was a heel turn for Austin, but by the reaction of the crowd it was a face turn for Vince.

-The Austin/McMahon relationship is covered next. Austin announces on RAW after Mania he doesn’t owe us an explanation. Just a better way of saying we have no reason why we pulled the trigger, so just accept it. Rock/Austin in a cage ends that RAW, and HHH looks to make the save for the Rock. Instead he turns heel, err, remains heel by blasting the Rock.

-Austin puts over the fact that Vince can take an ass whipping, and will do anything that he asks of his superstars.

-Now we discuss the 2 Man Power Trip of Austin/HHH. Austin puts HHH over as a tough son of a bitch, and it was proven when he finished the match after the 1st quad tear.

-We go back a bit and discuss the 3 Stages of Hell classic with HHH at No Way Out 2001 (one of the most underrated PPV of all time). I believe this won Match of the Year for 2001 by most accounts. I really can’t argue as it had a better ending than Rock/Austin, but personally I enjoyed the WM X-7 Main Event more. Another video package with crappy music, but it serves the purpose of showing how fantastic the No Way Out match was. Austin puts over HHH for carrying the ball and stepping up his game during the period Austin was out with the neck injury.

-Back to the heel turn, and more specifically Austin beating the shit out of JR in Oklahoma City. Vince screaming, “open him up” is still pretty funny. Austin says it was fun to do, but was difficult. JR mentions it wasn’t as fun for him.

-Michael Cole gets the hell beat out of him next, and I think that only made him more of a face. Next was some abuse for Tazz, and that actually helped as the crowd started to care about Tazz again.

-In a great angle Austin tried to get a petition signed to keep him out of the King of the Ring Triple Threat Match with Benoit and Jericho. He asked Spike Dudley and his bimbo (Molly Holly) to sign. Spike got pissed and bowed up against Austin by tearing up the petition. Spike got over huge for defending his girlfriend. In the end Spike got the piss beat out of him too, but it was a great moment up until that point.

-We jump to 05/29/01 and the SmackDown match for the WWF title against Benoit in Edmonton. One of the best matches you will ever see on free TV. The crowd was insane for Benoit, and McMahon was the special enforcer. Austin tests out that surgically repaired neck by taking TEN German Suplexes. The crowd counted along with each one, and Austin mentions that he felt those for a while. It would be awesome to get that match or the RAW match from 2 days earlier on a DVD set at some point, but you know.

-We hear from Arn Anderson as he mentions he first saw Austin at Center Stage in Dallas. We got talk about the Sportatorium and WCCW.

-Austin catches a break at WCW, and Stunning Steve Austin is born. Austin mentions that Stunning Steve was more of a pure wrestler instead of a brawler. No Shit! I love how everyone mentions they saw greatness in Austin from Day 1.

-We move to his feud with Ricky Steamboat. Austin says Steamboat is his favorite guy to ever work with. Steamboat probably gets that a lot. He also puts over Jake The Snake, and Ric Flair.

-Flair and Anderson put over the matches they had with the Hollywood Blondes. Thankfully a match with those 4 was released on a later Austin DVD (review coming at some point).

-We get a segment discussing Austin’s appearance on Mad TV. The cast put over how well Austin did, and how easily he picked up on things. Will Sasso does his Austin impression, and the real Austin approves.

-Austin lets us all know that he wanted to be a Rock N Roll Star until he realized he sucked. This leads to the awesome period in the summer of 2001 were Austin and Angle were fighting over Vince’s affection. Austin trying to cheer Vince up by singing a song and playing the guitar is still hilarious. I have no clue how all of them kept a straight face during these segments. Well, they answered my question as they show an outtake with Austin laughing his ass off during the initial taping. We get Kurt trying next and he sings “Jimmy Crack Corn.” This stuff is priceless.

-We got more of the Austin/Angle comedy hour. We get a clip where they tease fighting and then opt to take turns hugging Vince. They also show the infamous backstage segment where Austin buys Kurt a kid’s cowboy hat. Angle buys them badges, and Austin deliver the punch line everyone was waiting for. They mention that the reason all this was done was because both men were injured, and it was a way to keep them on TV.

-This all occurred during the InVasion, and Vince calls for the old Stone Cold to raise hell on WCW and ECW. The WWF then proceeds have Austin burn through the same conflicted angle that Sting went through with the n.W.o. The bad part is that it was an angle that lasted 18 months in WCW, and the WWF did it in one night.

-The origins of “what” are discussed. It started when Austin left a 15 minute long voice mail on Christian’s phone. It will be nice to have Christian back on future WWE DVD releases (assuming he is back in the WWE by the time this is posted). We get various moments of Austin tormenting wrestlers with the “what” chant.

-Things hit rock bottom with the “what” phenomenon when the crowd at MSG chanted “what” while Lillian sang the National Anthem. I remember a lot of people being up in arms about this because they viewed it as disrespectful. What made people even more upset was it was done not long after the events of Sept 11th.

-We eventually get the payoff for the Austin/Angle comedy hour when Austin joins the Alliance. This led to Superman Kurt vs. paranoid Austin at SummerSlam 2001 and it was another in a long line of Match of the Year Candidates for Austin that year. The WWF was booked into a corner, as they really didn’t want either man to lose and that sounds like a perfect place for a Dusty finish.

-Talk does shift to the events of 9/11 and the SmackDown on the 13th live from Houston. Everyone puts over that having SD live that night was the right thing to do. We grieved as a Nation and personally I was going a little stir crazy with the round the clock coverage, and I was happy to escape for few hours.

-JR mentions that Austin always gives more after the show goes off the air. We get footage of Austin messing with crowd and having a ball when the cameras go off. Mark Eaton (official beer thrower) discusses tossing the beers to Austin in the ring. He mentions he ran out of beer one time, and Austin made him pay for it. Everyone discusses the art of drinking beer like “Stone Cold” Steve Austin.

-We get words from Tom Stewart, camera operator. He mentions all the times Austin has played jokes on him. We get some pretty funny footage, and it shows how much of a blast Austin had during this time. Things obviously changed by the summer of 2002, but that’s for another DVD. Things end with one final video package.

Extras and Bonus Matches


No Way Out 2001
-Feb. 18, 2001

“Stone Cold” Steve Austin vs. HHH
-This was the payoff to the “Who ran over Stone Cold” angle from Survivor Series 1999. Rikishi was named as the driver, and when that fell flat on it’s face, the opted to put HHH in the storyline by saying he put Rikishi up to it. Of course there was no mention of the fact that the plan backfired on the Cerebral Assassin as Austin’s replacement in the Triple Threat Match, The Big Show walked out with HHH’s WWF Title. The build was that once the contracts were signed neither man could lay a finger on the other. So they played mind games with each other. Austin stunned Stephanie and HHH beat on JR. To add to things this is a 3 Stages of Hell Match. Basically, a 2 out of 3 falls match with a stipulation for each fall. In this cage we get: 1) a straight wrestling match 2) a street fight 3) steel cage. Naturally, nobody expected anything less than 3 falls coming into the match. In a nice touch this DVD actually gives the video package detailing the history between the 2 men leading to the match. I really appreciate that over other releases were they just give you the match cold.

Fall One: Straight Wrestling Match

-This was a blood feud and thankfully the two men say to hell with the traditional slow start and lock-up as they start throwing blows immediately. Austin gains the advantage with a back elbow and then stomps a mud hole in HHH in the corner. The crowd is solidly behind Austin as HHH continues to get his ass kicked from one end of the ring to the other. Ironically, HHH gains the advantage by dropping Austin with a Stun Gun. The action spills to the floor and Austin introduces HHH into the ring post, damaging the arm and shoulder. HHH’s tries to apply the Pedigree, but he can’t due to the damage to his arm from the post. Nice! Things settle into a more traditional wrestling match (as this first fall is supposed to be) and Austin works the arm. A Thesz press from Austin and he goes back to using rights and lefts. Austin tries an elbow off the middle rope but catches a boot in the mouth from HHH. The crowd tries to rally Austin, but he gets caught with a neckbreaker, and then another. Good strategy from HHH as he knows Austin is just a few months into his return from a neck injury. He leaves that strategy and clips Austin’s leg. That’s not really a bad move either since Austin has a history of knee problems also. The ring post is used by HHH this time as he wraps the bad wheel of Austin around post. Back inside the ring, HHH pulls out a figure 4, and it gets a nice pop from the crowd. Ever the good heel, HHH uses the top rope for leverage and the crowd doesn’t like that. Heels should always cheat whenever they can. It’s an instant heat getter. Austin starts to fight and is able to turn the hold over, but HHH is right next to the ropes. HHH continues to abuse the leg, but Austin fights back by using the knee brace as a weapon. Another Thesz press and the F-U elbow drop gets 2 for Austin. He prepares for the stunner, but HHH counters to another neckbreaker that gets a near fall. The two men reverse each other’s attempt at a roll-up and it gets 2 each time. Austin finally hits the elusive Stunner and gets the first pin @ 12:22. JR and King play up the fact that Austin beat HHH in his type of match (a straight wrestling match).

Fall Two: Street Fight

-The action hits the floor immediately and Austin suplexes HHH on the steel ramp. Austin’s a sick bastard and decides to do it once more. They head to the announce table, and Austin takes a monitor from the Spanish Team to blast HHH in the head. While HHH attempts to leave, Austin tosses chairs into the ring. Austin follows HHH into the crowd and pounds away 5 rows into the fans. Back to the ringside area and Austin throws HHH back inside the ring. Austin foreshadows what was to come at WM X-7 as he beats the Holy Hell out of HHH with a steel chair. For some reason I love that spot from 2001 Austin. Back to the floor and back to the announce tables. Austin rams HHH into the timekeeper’s table and that reveals a barbed wire 2x4. The crowd starts chanting for Foley. HHH has had experience with this weapon before and he makes good use of it here as he splits Austin’s forehead. The brawl continues on the announce table as JR and King run for cover. HHH goes for a pedigree on the announce table, but Austin backdrops him from that table to the Spanish Announce Table. Good Lord! And here I though the Spanish Team was going to get saved for 1 PPV. Austin makes the mistake of throwing HHH into a ring full of weapons and not paying attention to what he is doing. Sure enough when Austin enters the ring he gets blasted with a ring bell (that Austin threw in the ring earlier). That only gets 2. HHH hits a neckbreaker on the chair and that also only gets 2. HHH gets desperate to even things and keeps going for multiple falls, but each team he only gets 2. HHH is extremely frustrated at this point, and opts to for the Pedigree, but Austin backdrops him over the top rope to the floor. You think HHH would have learned after the last time he tried that move. It’s time for HHH to bleed, as he gets plastered with a chair, and then gets hit with the ring steps. Some days you just wake up and things don’t go your way. You know? Both men do a great job of putting over their exhaustion as the struggle to stand. HHH finds a sledgehammer under the announce table next to JR. The King accuses JR of hiding it for Austin, and they have a great back and forth over that. HHH reverses a Stunner into a sledgehammer shot. Not satisfied, HHH finally gets the Pedigree and that gets the 2nd pin @ 28:11 (total time). Austin: 1, HHH: 1.

Third Fall: Steel Cage
-Since all the weapons are still in the ring this essentially becomes a weapons filled cage match. JR and King now play up the fact that HHH beat Austin at his own game. HHH pounds away at the cut on Austin’s head to open him up a little more. If that didn’t work then a trip to the cage sure does. HHH apparently wants more blood as he rakes the barbed wire 2x4 across Austin’s face to horror of the crowd. Austin counters by blasting HHH in the head with a chair. That was pretty damn effective. Now Austin gets to use the barbed wire and HHH gets ripped open even more. Austin gets a cover, but it only gets 2. Both Lawler and JR are begging for an end as they have seen enough. The crowd begs to differ, as they want more blood. The pace has slowed quite a bit (as it should) and each man just pulls out whatever moves they can when they have the strength. HHH uses all he has to snap off a DDT. Both men fight on the top rope and exchange shots into the cage. Austin gets the worst of it and gets dropped balls first on the top rope. Austin recovers faster than most normal men would and tosses HHH of the top rope (like Flair, Ric). Austin goes for the Stunner, but HHH reverses to the Pedigree, and it only gets a 2 count. Austin grabs the 2x4 and HHH grabs the steel chair. The race is won by HHH as he blasts Austin with the chair. Another Pedigree is reversed to a slingshot and HHH eats the steel cage. Austin gets the Stunner, and now HHH gets to kick out at 2. Guess that makes them even. Each man gets desperate and crawls for the nearest weapon. HHH gets the sledgehammer and Austin gets the 2x4. They hit each other at the same time, but HHH is lucky enough to collapse on top of Austin to get the 3 count and the 3rd fall @ 39:25

HHH over Austin: 2 -1 @ 39:25
-This was hyped as a blood feud and damned if they didn’t deliver the goods. This was just an awesome brawl where both men just beat the piss out of each other. I personally like Rock/Austin and Rock/Angle from later in the year better, but this one had the clean finish and thus gets the full nod from me. *****

Bash at the Beach ‘94
-July 17, 1994

WCW US Title: “Stunning” Steve Austin © vs. Ricky “The Dragon” Steamboat

-This was the biggest PPV in the history of WCW at the time due to it being headlined by the first meaningful match between Hogan and Flair. Much like WM III, Steamboat was left on the under card to steal the show in a match for the secondary title. This was in the final year for both men in WCW (and Steamboat’s final year as an active wrestler period). I must say that I miss hearing the ring announcing skills of Gary Michael Cappeta. Man was gold. Heenan and Schiavone are the announce team for this match. Tony immediately brings up the fact that Steamboat ended the TV Title reign of Austin. Why did he stop doing things like that during the n.W.o era? Austin jumps the bell and works on the left knee of the Dragon. Steamboat fires back with what he knows best: chops and lots of them. Austin won’t be denied and continues to work the leg. He gets kicked off and goes shoulder first into the steel post. Dragon takes advantage and goes Old School like Taker to further the shoulder injury. I must add that Austin’s “Dragon Slayer” tights are tremendous. Austin gets dropkicked and falls of the top rope, but gets hung upside down. Dragon gives him a few more chops and locks in an armbar. Austin appears to have blown out his knee after a leap frog. I fear for Austin’s safety, and I think the ref should stop this match. Dragon ever the poor sport attacks Austin while he is down. Austin bails to the floor and calls for time, and miraculously seems to have recovered from the crippling knee injury. Back inside the ring, and the Dragon continues to work the arm with the armbar. It’s at this time I notice Linda Hogan sitting front row with both Nick and Brooke. Wow, lots of jokes there and so little time. I’ll leave it for those in the comments section below to make their own. Austin nails Steamboat in the little Dragon and sends him to the floor. He brings him back in with a suplex as for some reason this match has little heat. Steamboat still pissed over the fact he got kicked in the dick, chokes Austin and slams him to the mat. He follows with another armbar, as the crowd is gone at this point. Dragon’s never-ending armbars aren’t really helping things. The pace quickens a little, but they slightly blow a pinning sequence. The crowd comes alive after Austin kills the Dragon with a version of the STO. That was pretty damn sweet. Austin breaks out his karate skills as he mocks the Dragon. Steamboat calls for Austin to come on, and Austin obliges with chops of his own. The crowd is stating to get into this and a hot near fall occurs when Austin gets catapulted into the post. More chops from the Dragon, but he gets backdropped when Austin reverses the Irish whip. A reverse chin lock from a standing position looks to rip Dragon’s head off. Austin goes for about a dozen pin fall attempts, but only gets 2 each time. Austin makes me smile when he makes Steamboat wave to the camera (“Hi everybody.”). The cockiness goes away though after he gets caught with his own move: The Stun Gun. The action spills to the floor where Austin gets bounced into the post. Back inside Dragon hits the axe handle from the top rope, but doesn’t go for the cover. Dragon looks to be in control, but Austin stops that with a well-placed thumb to the eye. Austin looks to get disqualified by tossing Dragon over the top, but he skins the cat. They go into multiple pin fall mode, but nobody gets the 3 count. They fight over a tombstone, and after 3 reversals it ends with Dragon planting Austin in the middle of the ring. He heads up top to deliver the chop, but Austin pulls the ref in the way. However, the Dragon is able to leap over the ref. Austin wants to get disqualified for that, but Dragon pleads his case and the match continues. Steamboat hits a cross body, but Austin rolls through and is able to get the 3 count (with his feet on the ropes) @ 20:49.

Steve Austin retains the US Title via pin @ 20:49
-This started slow and never really seemed to click as well as one would expect. Once they did kick things into a high gear things were great, but it seemed to end just as they hit their groove. Still, it was a high quality match, but if left me thinking they could deliver a lot more. ***1/2

King of the Ring 1996
-We don’t get the final match with Jake, but we do get the historic post match coronation interview. “Talk about your Psalms. Talk about John 3:16. Austin 3:16 says I just whipped your ass.” Once he finished you could hear the massive pop from the crowd and Vince probably had $$$ in his eyes.

Origins of 3:16
-Austin mentions 3:16 was born when someone mentioned to him at King of the Ring 1996 that Jake Roberts had just cut a religious promo. For some reason Austin 3:16 just popped into his head. The rest is history.

Arn Anderson
-Arn discusses a match in Japan where he teamed with Austin back during the Dangerous Alliance days. Basically the match sucked because the 2 of them drank for about 15 hours straight.

The Camera Guy
-Austin interrupts the camera guys segment from earlier in the DVD Main Feature. Austin tortures the poor guy again, and it is quite funny.

Wildlife
-Just like any good redneck, Austin loves hunting. However, he also loves keeping wild game as pets, and we get footage of the zebras, and other animals on his ranch.

The 411: The Main feature kind of bounced all over the place, but it mainly covered the events of 2001. This was still in the early days of WWF DVD, and Austin has had 2 other DVDs come out since this one. No real reason to buy this one unless you want to get some of the Austin/Angle/Vince segments from 2001. Still, if you can find it for cheap it's got 1 great match (available elsewhere) and 1 good match.

Final Score:  6.0   [ Average ]